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How many of us don’t do something, simply because we are unsure of the outcome. How will we know what the outcome will be if we don’t give it a shot.  It’s something people think I have in spades “confidence” Which is quite true, confidence is half the battle, if your confident then all the worrying small stuff is not considered in your forward thinking. Only those that are worriers will take into consideration all the bits that cause issues. Let me explain.

When I was about to have a transplant I went to see the doctor, who would tell me of the risks that my treatment would Entail, included in the list were heart failure, lung failure, kidney damage, irreversible nerve damage, pancreatic failure and many others. As I walked out of that room I put all the words and warnings he had said to the back of my mind. I had signed a consent form agreeing that I would have the treatment and if any of the side effects happened I would not sue. That’s what the point was, that I would blame no one if something went wrong. 

What do you do, wallow in self pity. Ask why me? Get depressed and overwhelmed with what you are to face. Or, get on with it. I chose, oh and it was a physical choice. To carry on regardless, helping myself to focus on what I could do, as opposed to what I could not change. The potential possibilities would always be there no matter what. So what’s the point in worrying, yea just gotta stand up and move forwards, doing the things that are in your control, giving yourself the best chance at surviving that’s possible. Like giving up smoking, thinking positively, never allowing people’s words to bring you down. Keeping away from germs that little ones maybe carrying. But no matter what keeping focused on a long term goal, moving closer towards it. 

The goal I set for myself was a holiday, a friends brother in law speaks about always having a holiday to look forward to, he always books the next one as soon as he gets back off holiday which makes each day that bit nicer. We were not able to book our holiday as we had no idea what side effects I may have after treatment. But what I did have was confidence that I would make it. Saying the words that you know I say, I WILL and I CAN. you can be what ever you want to be, you just need to have that confidence to remove all barriers that are in your way. To believe whole heartedly that I would win and stand on that beach with my friends, then in turn swim with dolphins with my wife which has been a life long ambition. Even turning down an opportunity to do this in Kiakora New Zealand simply because I was doing it solo. Doing that with my wife will be amazing.

  It’s now our time, a time for us to shake off the cobwebs and live our life. 10/09/2015 means I am 47 and oh how proud I feel to have made that happen. To have triumphed over that horrible thing we call cancer. There is a song that’s very dear to me, it’s a song that we have wanted to fulfil the words to. To feel real love in the home that we live it, now after our triumph we do. How amazing is that.

Have a great week,


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Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.