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Cancer changes lives by there becoming a new normal. Some may even say that normal does no exsist after you have been touched by cancer. I don’t know about that, but what is a very real fact is that many people that have suffered cancer do not ever find what’s normal again. I do have an idea for a solution though. I do feel it’s appropriate to know where you are going, to have an end game goal. It does however seem to me that people are putting to much pressure on themselves to be the normal that they were. That it’s unacceptable to have a new normal, does normal exsist on a daily basis.i think people confuse normal with comfort or continuity, that life has no change in it. Is it not the change that we face that causes people to feel depressed. Is it not mearly how we interpret the change that we face and how we choose to deal with it. I know depression is not a choice, but positivity is. Speaking good, happy and nice things are a choice.
People don’t like change and that is a fact, we like things to be predictable. Unfortunately cancer is far from predictable, I think in allot (not all) it’s our attitude to what may be ahead that may mean that we are able to beat it or not. Depression is after all a state of mind, and only those that have depression may disagree because they are happy to predict that they will be depressed tomorrow. People that say they are depressed will be that way, that is unless the person suggests it may be the case and are not happy to be in this state.
What I say to people is, you are what you want yo be. If you say it, it’s so. I have heard it argued that depression is a condition, I agree. But it’s a condition you choose to NOT have, someone today put it like this. I am in that black hole they call depression, the place where everything seems bad.
Please don’t misunderstand me I know only to well what it feels like to feel helpless,mot not want treatment anymore. To not have the strength to carry on. I know how it feels to have no answers, to put into google the word “positivity” because I was in a place where I had non. So never think that I don’t know what it’s like to be at my lowest eb because I do. I really do.
When I wake everyday, I do my best to say positive things, to avoid at all costs the black hole. We say what we are, and we believe what we say. Why wouldn’t we after all we are the person we know best in the world, so if we say we are depressed we are right. Yes that’s right you are, because you said it. Oh rest assured you will be depressed if you have said it, say it again and you will be even more. You say you can’t do something your right. The only person stopping you doing anything is you, the only person giving you the ability to say yes is you.
You are the solution to your happiness, yes of course if your happy to be in that condition you will disagree with this whole blog.mpositivity is an action, a decision. These are my opinions based on my own journey, I am not a doctor, but I am drawing on choices I make everyday. Start speaking life to yourself, start telling yourself your happy to be alive. I wonder how long it will be before you realise that day you do that, that you have had a better day.
Have a great day
Fonz
http://www.fonzandcancer.com
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It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.
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Thank you, Fonz, for sharing what you’ve learned. You always encourage me.
I try to stay positive, too. Some days it’s harder than others.
I just put up a blog about my sweet pooch, Cooper. He has been my best most constant sweetest companion during my cancer challenge and journey.
And tomorrow Coop is having surgery. I’m worried for him. And sorry he has to go through this pain. 😦
(((HUGS)))
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Oh nooo, I watch a programme called “vet on the hill” last night. I broke my heart. Please let me know cooper is ok. I will be concerned to. Sending you a hug. 👨❤️💋👨
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Hi appreciate what you are saying about choosing to be in a certain mind state but depression is not a condition. It can be but Depression can be an illness that’s title is very misleading because a lot of the time being depressed has nothing to do with feeling sad. People with Depression have certain reactions to treatment – medication or ECT to name a couple. Just because depression is in the brain that doesn’t mean it isn’t any easier to fight than say Cancer. The body and mind if unbalanced affect the other and are more often than not connected. Not all Cancer survivors are in the same kind of mind set. Some are like you and some are more predisposed to a pessimistic attitude.
I am in awe of your courage and your mind set to fight and live with your illness.It is a great mind set to have if you can grasp it. All the best
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I am most certainly not going to disagree with any of what you have said. Only to say. Positives can’t exsist without a negative. How we view the negative and live with it is the key to a good life in what ever we are dealing with. And thank you. X
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Hi I wonder if you could help me
A month ago I was diagnosed with kidney cancer
Thru the positive actions of a great surgeon and me pushing them the op took place in 2 weeks and I have been informed by the surgeon that he believes he caught it all and with future check ups should make sure it is captured early if it returns
My dilemma
Do I celebrate the all clear or do I sit and wait for a potential return,
Glass half empty half full scenario
Regards
Roy
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Roy Hi, the question you ask is a quandary every person has that gets the all clear. Join our group and get a discussion going it’s an interesting topic.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/1595998743956536/
What I have surmised is that, I should not worry about what is not there, but be grateful I have another chancer at life without cancer. Does that make sense? I hope to see you in our group Roy.
Kindest regards
Fonz
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Thanks fonz
Yes that does make sense
I have joined the group as it is very informative and helps getting opinions from others who have been visited by the big C
Regards
Roy
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Your words mean a lot, staying positive through everything is not easy.
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Thank you, you say such nice things x
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