What you choose makes a differance.

Tags

airport, business, cancer, chemotheropy, everybody, gift, happiness, hope, love, men, morories, turkey, women

It’s so very important to set achievable goals when you face cancer. When your facing chemo or a terminal cancer it’s important to have short term goals that are obtainable. I mean some goals I had were getting to the next second. Smiling because even though I have illness it’s up to me to make some sunshine. 

It’s down to us to make something good when facing something bad. To look for something positive in life even though we think there is nothing to be positive around us. On thing I used to have as a target and still do, is to remember something that made me smile, a time we enjoyed together. I remember how many times I watched our wedding DVD, the happy day that we shared together, the love we shared with our friends. 

Don’t get me wrong some days I would just cry, I would not be able to help crying, I just did. I cryed and cryed and cryed some days. I learnt that days like that were good as my brain was being washed with all the toxins chemo had left me with. I learnt that even those days were good days. Why because I was able to have a better few minutes afterwards. Cancer taught me that life can be taken from us as we know it in an instant. One moment we are doing what we love then the next moment so it seems, a doctor says those dreadful words. “You have cancer” then the old normal has been left behind. 

Only right then can we understand what the importance of laughter friendship and love is. How important it is to recall all the good we had in our lives and how important it is to make happy moments in our lives today. Because as you and I both know, there is no tomorrow. There is only today for us to make a differance, but we also are able to recall the good times we had before cancer came and it’s for sure been a vital part of my life with cancer. There is always something we can do, don’t give up, remember the beauty you have had and have in your life. Me personally I believe in Jesus, I believe in the power of God also. I also believe that we are given strength by his people. That it’s up to us to see the good in someone, and also do good for someone. What ever you may believe in the spiritual world, that’s your choice. But does it matter what another believes. Should we not love our fellow man anyway, find something positive and do anyway.

Don’t get me wrong there is evil in this world that we will never understand, but the only way to make this world a better place is to do something yourself. Choose to do something, remember something good. Give something good to someone, even if that which you give is a memory, or a reminder of a memory. There is always a way to bring sunshine to someone’s life. 
I hope you choose to.
Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com
Our support group on our FB
Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 
It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories.
Copyright © 2016

It’s about determination.

Tags

belief, determination, eu, fear, fulfilment.grace, hope, love, referendum

This weekend I have had the honour of meeting many people, yet I should not really be here myself. I when I got cancer the second time realised I could let it beat me, or I could fight. So like I had the pleasure of sharing this weekend, the first post I wrote was. ” I am Mark, a cancer fighter. I will win!” Arrogant, or determined. Well arrogance is not based on what is not seen, so I would say determination. In life, it’s what we choose to do that matters, what we choose to not do has no effect on our lives, except negative. What really? Well yes because doing nothing is erm just that isn’t it, doing NOTHING.


I love people that do with thier lives, people that say yes to doing rather than making an excuse not to do. Are you with me? Ok so people that want to do and don’t just say they will but do do. I saw pictures today that would be hard for some to comprehend. Like a hook as big as a house. Yea like I said some will not be able to imagine. There is a point to this trust me. 

So for me giving up in that room was the easiest, it was really really easy to just let go of my life that my parents had given me. They had joined together and made me, I was made in love through their passion and love for each other. Now whilst I may never totally understand my parents, I do want to thank them for my life. But do I just have them to thank, do I not also have someone else to thank much greater and knowledgable than me. Do I not have my maker to thank, the person that put my parents together. Well that’s thanks to Bible collage, yea I know wild right. 

It does not matter how your life started, it matters how you value what you are, who you are and what you stand for. what your life means. Well for me mine is a statement of what can be achieved. We live in a generation where we hear of much going on all around us on social media. Love hate and much inbetween. Yet it’s our choice still what we choose to do or not to do. I have chosen in the past to hate, and I was proberbly hated aswell. But I have this to tell you today, loving someone and being loved by someone is a gift you give and a gift you take given to you by someone else. People choose to love you and I find the most amazing times I have had since choosing to beat cancer have been choosing to be myself. To be who I am, for years before cancer I had times where I tried to please others by being something. But not me. I did try to be a person I did not know. Tried maybe to impress where there was no need, forgetting that the real me was actually me.

That the real me was the best me there is and was. That I am not a failure, I am not living a life for nothing. So I leave you with this statement. 

“The real you is the best you, just be you”! 

Trust me if someone does not want to be in your future it’s their loss.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories.

Copyright © 2016

The EU and my thoughts on the subject.

Tags

conservative, eu, forwards, health, hope, labour, love, nhs, primeminister, referendam, together, unity

Many of you know me by now, and know that I like to turn things around into positives. We have just had a referendum and  England has chosen to be out of the EU. We have as a nation decided to Leave, it looks quite close when you look at the percentage. But that equates to 1,269,501 more people decided to leave compared to remain. I don’t know about you, but that’s a lot of people in my mind. Do you know that’s more people that the whole of Wales and northern Ireland put together that chose to vote. The total of the two combined being 1,212,784 in Wales and Northern Ireland that came out to vote. A LOT of people.

Now to me what we are faced with here is an oppertunity, it’s not an accident. It’s a choice we have made and for me it’s something we can not change. What we can change though is how we respond to it, what we do as a nation and what we do from now on has to be surely an oppertunity for unity. I found this on what is today 24th June, interesting how the article says day 24 yet written nearly 8 years ago, making reference to the verse I refer to in Psalm 133. Day 24

So for me this is what we now are going to become, we are going to have a new Destiny. A new start, a new beginning. Let’s see what our future holds not as a curse but a clear chance for us all to bless one another going forwards. To hold out our hands to those that struggle, there is absolutely nothing to be gained by fighting what we have chosen to do going forwards. What ever Wales, Northern Ireland, and Scotland do is up to them. If they don’t want to be a part of the United Kingdom, will we still be in unity and be a blessed nation. There will always be consequences to any decision that’s made, we WILL deal with those as they come. Please stand though, please stand together and face what ever it is that we face. Together. Let’s walk forwards in unity as we leave the EU and become the Stong people that we are. 

You have a choice, help or complain. I say, lets role up our sleeves and work together to hold on to the Britain that we all want but let’s do it Together. In unity with one voice without pointing fingers and remarking on what we would have been without leaving the EU. We are where we are, the only thing we can do is to now choose who we want to run our country and that what we need to concentrate on. The change what you want as a sovereign country is now down to you. You can either complain that the vote did not go your way. Or you can choose the government that you want moving forwards, because surely moving forwards is better than looking back.

But let’s move forwards TOGETHER.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories.

Copyright © 2016

Destiny

Ironic that I see this today, 1 year since I wrote this blog. Please read the original. This is a really good post, even if I do say so myself. 😊

fonzandcancer blogging to encourage.

When I think about how I got to where I am, I am not quite sure how this party animal ended up here, As the picture suggests I am not unhappy about where we have ended up. All my blogs are about really is to help people (you) think outside of the box. (So to speak) not looking at what’s straight in front of you but looking a little further than you might have looked before. Less and less people read them so today I am going to learn how and where to put them. Because I am only using facebook and Twitter at the moment. I am gonna find some new avenues to exsplore today. Please feel free to share what has worked for others with me.

When I travelled across Australia, the only plans I had were to go from west (Perth) Australia to Brisbane on the north…

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How I gave up smoking.

Tags

belief, chemotheropy, family, hope, joe, killing, love, mcmillan, nicotine, strength, winning.

I don’t know about the rest of the world, but for me when I got hodgkins Lymphoma. I was told that there was no evidence to people getting my cancer through life style. Ie drinking or smoking, or eating. So for me I was not being told to give up cigerettes and it’s not going to give me a better chance of not getting it again by not smoking. So I didn’t, I smoked throughout my whole cancer exsperience. Even when I was in treatment I still smoked at home. .

Your mountain, to climb.

Inspiration from my brothers picture.

fonzandcancer blogging to encourage.

Good morning, I have woken up on the settee, So knowing I over did it yesterday I hope when I climb the wooden hill I will sleep again. But for now, I want to encourage you, to press on up that mountain. To focus on your next few steps as apposed to the massiveness of the mountain that’s yours to climb. Believe in yourself, know that you are the most amazing person that you have ever been, and tomorrow you will be more amazing than you were today. You will have learnt more, be able to inspire more. You are the most amazing person alive. You have to believe that though. Only You can have the faith you need. Only you can reach out your hand when you know you can’t make it alone.

The help you need is everywhere, God is omnipresent, he uses people to help us on…

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Accept who you are not what you were.

Tags

belief, chemotheropy, depression, google, hate, hope, love, mistake, prison, yourself, youtube

U can be who you want to be, that’s what I tell my wife. Some words I may have said before but I know that what I write now will help someone today or sometime in the future. I have not been here for a while, I apologise. I have been helping my good friend to errect my conservatory. I have spoken before in my last post about impossible, that the only part of impossible that stops it big possible is the I’m in the word. Is not the only person that matters holding your past against you. Is, erm you? Is it not you that’s giving you a hard time maybe feeling guilty for your past, something you did or did not do? One thing I do know is that what someone else’s opinion is is both nothing to do with you, and nothing to do with them. Let go what someone else thinks about you, what you are is in your hands and your past does NOT define your future.

Your future starts in the next hour, the next afternoon. But always today, your future does not start tomorrow. You are the one that chooses who you are. You also chose what you were, but that’s not a part of your future , only if you want it to be. Your past is in your hands, it’s up to you yo hold on to it or let it go. It’s up to you to let your past mood you and benifit your future. No one is to blame for your future, only you. Don’t start yo tell me yes but such and such and this and that, you choose what happens next. You really do, don’t be a head hanger. Hold your head up high and keep moving forwards, keep believing in yourself and keep doing. 


Believe me I could show you pictures of me that say I want to give up, I could tell you stories of how cancer has made me want to check out, how I have thought badly of myself because of who I was and what I did. Trouble with that is that people will believe what ever it is you believe of yourself and there are plenty of people willing to be negative about you out there so why actually be one yourself. Be good to you, say good things about you. Above all do good to others every day of your life, that’s really important. Use your life, don’t regret your life.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.

Copyright © 2016

A death sentence.

Tags

blog, books, c, cancer, chemotheropy, health, hope, Laughter, love, me, post, radiotheropy

Is that that what cancer is? A death sentence we didn’t choose? A journey we didn’t choose. A part of our life we never even thought would be part of our lives. Before you read this blog I want you to know, that people that face cancer in what ever form be it as a patient, partner,  family, carer, or friend. I want you to know these people are amongst the most courageous in the world. All cancers are different and how ever we decide to deal with it rest assured the journey is one through Hell. 

Today I found myself in the presence of someone amazing, someone who has fought the fight like I have and are. He is an inspiration and a seriously generous person with his time. Today I left hospital one year ago, the same hospital the man I speak of left 2 years ago after his bone marrow transplant. Yet we find ourselves together errecting a conservatory. Part of that day involved standing on a trellis on tip toes for a while with my arms in the air holding the cross beam in place. It was 10 mins before my next pain killers. What you don’t know is walking is tough, never mind standings or a period of time. The pain as I stood began yo surpass the pain that was normal and bearable, and I found myself feeling so very sore and horrific pain in my legs.

There I was with my friend who I knew was one of the few people on the earth that understood my pain, one of the few people that understood what I felt inside. Understood the actual pain I felt. Here tonight remembering what’s happened today and what we have achieved. I don’t feel sorry I cried, I feel amazed I have a brother who knows and understands what I face and what I have been through and what appreciation I have for life. Holding that bar up feeling the pain I felt made me cry, it made me feel useless whilst being useful. We did something today that was hard to do. Maybe some would see as impossible. For me and my friend we believe in the impossible made possible.

Sometimes the only thing standing in the way is ourselves, and maybe we just need to fight through the pain and get to the otherside. The side where there are people that have life because they fought, people that have overcome grief in loving the very people that do have life and are living today. 

Maybe you feel today is impossible, well let me tell you that it’s amazing what you can achieve if you keep on keeping on. Did you know impossible means the opposite to what you think. See  you are possible, it’s just the I’m in the way of possible isn’t it. Try and find something you enjoy in this life, it’s there if you look for it. I know one thing . 

I have gained many friends through cancer. Keep on keeping on your one of lives courageous people and you CAN.

Fonz

Survivors guilt!!

Some may need this today.

fonzandcancer blogging to encourage.

Right up till today I thought survivors guilt did not exsist in my life, I would go so far as to say I did not even feel it existed at all, today is a hard day. For sure a wave of oppression is and has been on me today, I am using all my trix in positive thinking. It’s all in vein though, I just feel like it’s an impossible task to pull myself out of the deep sinking sand. I have seen a couple of people on my Facebook of late grieving their lost ones, it has made me feel guilt. Guilt that I wish there was someway to take their greif from them. Asking questions like “why did I survive” “nothing special about me” I am struggling to exsplain how I feel but I will give it my best shot.
You see I am learning how human I…

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The most important thing in life.

On watching the c word tonight on bbc1 I thought this appropriate.

fonzandcancer blogging to encourage.

The most important thing in life.
You ever stopped to think what’s the most important thing on earth. Whats more important than anything else. I have had a dream for about a year now perhaps a little longer. Since I went to a lovely village in Pembrokeshire. A dream to live in a house there, and run a holiday cottage separate to the house.

It’s something we all need, no one of us is excluded from animals to humans. We rely on it for our very existence, so much is dependant on it. As you all know by now I am recovering from cancer, in something that some call, Recovery, or remission. I have been here before, but the dream did not exist back then because I had never been to Pembrokeshire and seen the amazing place. You see, it really does not matter what your post code is as…

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Sunshine and Bees.

Tags

business, cancer, chemotheropy, desease, garage, hope, life, police, scanner, treatment

Do you ever just stop, look and listen to the natural world. Listen to the bees buzzing, watch the birds communicating as they sing their chorus. Appreciate the smell of the flowers in the garden, gaze in wonder at all that has been created. I often look out of our window at the birds feeding at the bird station. My wife always buys thes coconut shells filled with fat that the birds love. But then today I was wondering why I appreciated the small things so much, why I appreciated the smells and the world of nature. How I had become so grateful for my surroundings. Well I guess the answer to that is simple, and obvious.

I know what it’s like to be unable to smell the flowers, to watch the bees. I know what it’s like not to be able to here the birds. It was only 3 weeks where I experienced life unable to hear the birds  the bees and the wind russling between the leaves. To be unable to smell the sweet fragrance of flowers in my garden. I was not even able to feel the sunshine on my face such was the reality of the small room I was cooped up in. But you know what, I am grateful I have had that experience in that room isolated from the world. With my I pad my wife (during the day) and the days on fan that kept me cool at night times. Because I can hear the birds today, I can smell the flowers today, I can hear the birds chatting in the morning.

Life is without doubt a precious gift, one that we never truly appreciate until we are not able to experience life with all of its senses. Is then life not a gift to you to me, to all the creatures that roam the earth. Are we not all fortunate and blessed that we have air to breath and eyes to see. I have found myself not being bothered about what is going on in someone else’s world, found myself becoming a curtious driver. I have found giving gives me a great deal of pleasure, where as before it was what I wanted that as most important. 

Right now there is a valeter disrupting all this tranquility with his loud jet washer. But hey, it seems to make no differance to the birds. They still sing, they are still playing in the trees, and seem happy to be alive. The point is, the birds and the bees don’t care what we do, they just carry on enjoying what they can. Accepting the world they live in for what it is, take a moment to pause today and admire the world that’s all around us. Take a moment to appreciate what you do have rather than what you don’t have. After all, what we have today is a gift. A gift to be enjoyed appreciated and cherished. But will you? Do you? A year ago today I had no option but to continue life with out the enjoying senses that I have been given. One thing I did do though, because I was able to. That was to encourage my fellow man to keep on keeping on, what ever that path maybe. Blogging 365 times in as many days. 

I hope you find time to enjoy what is all around you today, enjoy what you do have.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.

Copyright © 2016