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friends, internationalstressday, nationalstressawarenessday, nationalstressday, Stress, stressday
How are you doing today? Happy? I spoke to a guy today that has suffered with Depression all of his life, I won’t pretend to know what I am talking about or say I am an expert on the subject. Because for sure that’s not true, but what I can tell you how I have dealt with things. I know that when you shake a bottle of pop, then take the top off it goes absolutley everywhere. It’s the same with stress, I think personally that Anxiety and stress are in the same family and both CAN lead to a state of depression. Although I don’t understand fully the medical state of depression there are many thoughts I would like to talk about in this blog, and share my own experiences and talk about how I overcame stress.
My first bit of advice to anyone that is suffering from stress is to make sure that non of what you feel belongs to someone else. For example the way someone parks outside your house. That someone has not finished something, the way people live their lives. Anything that’s not yours to worry about is NOTHING to do with you.
The garbage truck Talks about that and how you have enough problems of your own without worrying about what others do, it just fills your back pack up with other people’s junk! What’s the point.
The only way to over come stress in my mind is to Let it go. Look at it like this, that it’s a pop bottle with the top on it. That with the top on the pressure can build up, like us if we have no outlet at all! The stress builds up and can lead to serious illness. Where as a bottle with no top on can be poured out any time you like and no pressure builds up at all.
Credits: Lukas Gojda/Shutterstock
So I have to go back to the man in the Dacia Duster again reversing into a space next to me and I was getting bothered about it. Why, just let it go, it is after all nothing to do with me what so ever. Unless of course he had hit our car, then I would have had to react appropriately.
There are many tools available to us, mindfulness, mental health is a real issue. (I know here I go again right) cancer changed my life and helped me see a new world. Although sometimes I let little things others do affect my day I do want to be a better person tomorrow than I am today. I learnt that if I have tension that I needed an out let. I don’t have the energy of a normal man, so excercise although important was and is not a method that keeps me stress free. So I had to achieve a number of things that did not involve expending energy. I thought maybe writing and having something to think about would help. So I started a blog and challenged myself to write everyday for a whole year. 365 blogs in 1 year. I did that and you are now reading the blog that I stated writing.
To overcome stress, you need another focus, I have a car that I take out when I need a smile putting on my face. I will go out for a drive just to hear the exhaust note.
When I was at my junior school I used to sit in front of a fish tank and watch the fish. Mr Glover thought this was a punishment to me, but I loved it so used to be naughty to get out of his boring lessons. The led to me having a pond where I watch my fish and allow my heart rate to be lowered, thus relieving me of stress. I believe stress leads to anxiety and depression, and is a serious problem that people need pressure releases to overcome it. Boxing, cycling, walking, swimming, a hobby like my fish are, boating, hill climbing, canoeing, shooting, classic cars, writing, art, gardening, being part of a group that challenges you. All these things release stress, I used to dance, (badly) but it released stress. Weight training helps to, as does anything that keeps coming into your mind like a job that needs doing in the house. Get it done and it’s not an issue anymore, that can cause stress to the longer it goes on for.
One thing I realise is no one will help you if you don’t help yourself. But helping yourself makes you feel good as does helping others. You will need to find your own stress reliever, but having our dogs is a massive stress reliever as are cats. Our cat was put down a few weeks ago which was sad. But times a healer, our two dogs have given us a new perspective and always are with us.
Laughter with friends is the same as the whistle on an old kettle, actually why don’t all Kettles whistle when they boil? But that whistle is what’s happening to your body when you laugh, you let off steam. Only yesterday I talked to a friend about how important it is to have something to look forwards to and something that will help you release pressure from your system. Even a stress ball can help,
Stress can be revealed in many ways, here are a few. People that are stressed respond differently to people that are relaxed. They snap, take things personally. They clench their fists, they don’t hug their partner enough. Take it out on their partner rather than talking about it and hugging it out. Stressed people also don’t make their bed and have piles of things yo do in the house that have mounted up. I know because I have been, and have created all these problems myself. You will go to bed and still be arguing, you will drive to fast. For me there are lots of things that don’t cost money that can help with stress relief. Time with friends and a game of pool is really good for mental health aswell. Your not a failure if your stressed you have just gotten into a situation where you have taken to many things on. Don’t take on any more and get the jobs ticked off one at a time and don’t look at it all at once. If you look at the 101 jobs that need doing you will never do even just 1 job. So just do one at a time. Once one is done move onto the next ect ect.
Trust me ticking some boxes, and having a holiday to look forwards to. Will help your mind set. We got back from Scotland and booked another cottage for next year. 2 weeks away with our dogs, my mum n dad will come and my brother and sister in law with my nephew Zac. It will be fun and something ahead we will enjoy together.
Take care of each other, your important. More important than you know. Make sure you look each other in the eyes and hug. Hugging and loving others is a tremendous way to relive stress. Say sorry, even if it’s not your fault. I tell myself. You don’t have to be right, it takes effort to be stress free. But for sure a stress free life is far better than anxiety and depression. Releasing your stress will go a long way to helping yourself in other areas of your life.
Hugs to you all, wow and thanks for reading. Just think if just by sharing this you helped someone. Just a thought.
Fonz
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Everything you read are better based on my own experipence and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone
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Here is one way to deal with stress…The Veterans Administration recommends it to Veterans with anxiety and PTSD…
https://www.nearariver.com/just-breathe-near-river-bj-rae-eagle-encouraging-words/
BJ, author of near a river
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Thank you.
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I guess I have tended to be driven by stress and it can be quite exciting – having deadlines to meet,challenges, but that’s good stress, motivation and a bit of pressure to help us reach for excellence, something more. Toxic stress is when it all starts to get too much and it can turn inward, becoming depression in the end, or some kind of negative behaviour to try and manage it. Going through such a massive trial as serious illness must lead to a completely different perspective. It’s good to be reminded of the need for quality of life, not just what we think of as ‘achievements’. Makes me very sad to think of what you have had to go through, even though you seem to have been able to derive many positives from it.
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It’s how we respond that matters isn’t it 👍
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Yes, because we are unlikely to get away with no toxic stress at all in life. Sometimes it’s not knowing how that is the issue though and that is something we have to learn in our own way., through reflection, sharing experience with others or
seeking professional help.
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Loving yourself is the starting point, Caring about ourselves helps us overcome all stress. Toxic stress is something we accept in our lives or let go of. If it’s toxic it’s not good for us. Let it go I say.
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Yes, it has never crossed my mind – I doubt I have thought much about myself ever, just doing what needs to be done, paying my way, fulfilling obligations. I have done stuff for other people that I wouldn’t do for myself. If I had ever taken a step back and had a look at myself in the equation, my own needs, I wouldn’t have got into those situations or stayed in them. But as your dad quotes in the previous post, the years we invest come back to us. Better to try and fail than never to try at all.
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Totally agree in that, it’s better to do something than to do nothing 😊
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Reblogged this on rimaalalamy.
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Reblogged this on Dream Big, Dream Often.
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I need to read this several times over to get the words and the meaning into my stubborn head, being 67 you think I would have learnt these lessons ages ago!
Excellent post!
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I hope you find it helpful my friend? I think we are learning all of our lives..😒
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That is one of the joys of Life; there’s always something New.
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Well said!
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Thanks very much..
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