I don’t know how to say this, but I am pretty sure I can articulate it well enough in a post. When I had cancer once, my eyes were not opened as much as what they are now. Although the ABVD treatment was horrific, it was only a snippet of what have ICE chemo BEAM and then a Bone marrow transplant is like. People can’t understand what it’s like, for that I am grateful. It’s quite easy for me to be relieved that a person has not had to have just one of the treatments I have had. Because when I say “I would not wish it on my worst enemy” I really mean just that.
I find it a struggle these days to know of someone having to have treatment, I don’t mind telling you, it makes me weep and drop to my knees and pray for that person. The compassion I feel for the person is overwhelming, and a real emotional roller coaster. When I set out on this journey of writing my blog 365 times in 365 day, I had a lot of time on my hands and no energy. I remember not being able to pick up my I pad even, I don’t expect you to believe me. It’s not possible to understand unless you have been through it yourself. A friend reminded me how hard it was today as she shared some of what her BMT (bone marrow transplant) was like. It took me back, to not being able to write, but guess what I did. I wrote. Why, because I wanted the world to know how it was for me in there. How feeling unable but doing anyway felt. How hard life really is, that in comparissum to a parking issue my life was in the balance and I was fighting for it.
It’s really difficult for me not to be emotional these days when I learn someone has to have any kind of treatment. I have empathy and compassion in massive amounts. It’s tough having that much compassion you know it really is. All I hope is that it’s not you, that by reading what I have written in my blog that you realise that life is more precious than you ever thought it was before reading my blog. Each day I awake is a bonus, I say thank you audibly to God for each day I have. On Saturday someone said to me how they enjoyed my blogs, that they come across well. Someone else told me off for not writing everyday. I can only apologise to you all, I have been busy. My wife wants a conservatory so I am making that happen for her. For me I don’t care what it takes, if I can make my wife happy then at least I have some purpose to this life I have been allowed to live.
It’s been a funny old week, I have seen a man cry who remembered another’s journey. I have seen compassion in people beyond belief. I have seen a friend smile whilst we went out for a trundle in my TVR seemingly small things, but things I never thought would happen again. So when you know someone is in treatment, treat them. Give them something to smile about. Even if it’s just a visit, a home made cake, what ever it is. Trust me that persons day will be better, and you will of made a difference in their life. Is that not amazing that you CAN make a differance in someone’s life. Wow that for me although the best is the toughest thing to do, to reach out to someone in treatment. Yet it means so much to the person. There is no rule book, we are not supposed to know what to say or do. But to show love to someone in that lonely time of treatment is unforgettable to the person, and something that gives you fuel for your day.
I will always find it hard because I know what they face, but that’s given me a love for people that will never ever wilt. I hope you all have a great week, give to someone this week you have never given to before. Be grateful for the life you have what ever you face. It could always be worse, so why not choose to makes someone’s better.
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Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.
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