One of the toughest things about cancer for me.

Tags

cancer, chemotheropy, comfort, Compassion, courage, fatigue, giving, hope, love

I don’t know how to say this, but I am pretty sure I can articulate it well enough in a post. When I had cancer once, my eyes were not opened as much as what they are now. Although the ABVD treatment was horrific, it was only a snippet of what have ICE chemo BEAM and then a Bone marrow transplant is like. People can’t understand what it’s like, for that I am grateful. It’s quite easy for me to be relieved that a person has not had to have just one of the treatments I have had. Because when I say “I would not wish it on my worst enemy” I really mean just that.

  
I find it a struggle these days to know of someone having to have treatment, I don’t mind telling you, it makes me weep and drop to my knees and pray for that person. The compassion I feel for the person is overwhelming, and a real emotional roller coaster. When I set out on this journey of writing my blog 365 times in 365 day, I had a lot of time on my hands and no energy. I remember not being able to pick up my I pad even, I don’t expect you to believe me. It’s not possible to understand unless you have been through it yourself. A friend reminded me how hard it was today as she shared some of what her BMT (bone marrow transplant) was like. It took me back, to not being able to write, but guess what I did. I wrote. Why, because I wanted the world to know how it was for me in there. How feeling unable but doing anyway felt. How hard life really is, that in comparissum to a parking issue my life was in the balance and I was fighting for it.

It’s really difficult for me not to be emotional these days when I learn someone has to have any kind of treatment. I have empathy and compassion in massive amounts. It’s tough having that much compassion you know it really is. All I hope is that it’s not you, that by reading what I have written in my blog that you realise that life is more precious than you ever thought it was before reading my blog. Each day I awake is a bonus, I say thank you audibly to God for each day I have. On Saturday someone said to me how they enjoyed my blogs, that they come across well. Someone else told me off for not writing everyday. I can only apologise to you all, I have been busy. My wife wants a conservatory so I am making that happen for her. For me I don’t care what it takes, if I can make my wife happy then at least I have some purpose to this life I have been allowed to live. 

  
It’s been a funny old week, I have seen a man cry who remembered another’s journey. I have seen compassion in people beyond belief. I have seen a friend smile whilst we went out for a trundle in my TVR seemingly small things, but things I never thought would happen again. So when you know someone is in treatment, treat them. Give them something to smile about. Even if it’s just a visit, a home made cake, what ever it is. Trust me that persons day will be better, and you will of made a difference in their life. Is that not amazing that you CAN make a differance in someone’s life. Wow that for me although the best is the toughest thing to do, to reach out to someone in treatment. Yet it means so much to the person. There is no rule book, we are not supposed to know what to say or do. But to show love to someone in that lonely time of treatment is unforgettable to the person, and something that gives you fuel for your day.

  
I will always find it hard because I know what they face, but that’s given me a love for people that will never ever wilt. I hope you all have a great week, give to someone this week you have never given to before. Be grateful for the life you have what ever you face. It could always be worse, so why not choose to makes someone’s better.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.

Copyright © 2016

Tired of being strong.

Tags

commited, giving, grace, love, passion, patience, unconditional

Strange statement some may think, but it is true that people suffering illness get tired of being strong. Continually smiling at those that don’t really care about you. They just ask how you are to make themselves feel better. Maybe they feel they are doing a good turn. They ask a person recovering from cancer how they are “how are you”? They say. They don’t mean it, they don’t come and have fun and laughter knowing the person still suffers but bringing at least some happiness. For some they ask for themselves, so they can say they asked how the person was. Well I am tired of those people that don’t really care, the people that do for show. I am sad that people don’t ask and mean it, I am sick of meaningless chit chat. I would rather no greeting than a fake question they want a “yea great,how about you”?answer. I am tired of appearing strong for them. Those people that never send a text or phone. But ask you when they see you, because it’s convenient. Do they really care? Are they bothered really? If so why do they never visit, why do they say words but have no actions. 

  
I have people in my life that love me, they know they love me and I feel it. Others know they should do, but they don’t because you are not as important as the things or people they regard as important. But I ask you this question. Are not some of those people that you regard as important, people that provide or give something to you. Or do you want nothing from them but they do anyway. Do you maintain relationships because you benifit from them, or do you show those that you love that you do for no reward. If you want nothing but still do, that’s true love. That’s unconditional love. 

Please watch this short video, it says all this post is meant to be.

Unconditional love for another, is one of the most precious actions a person can be. Do you do because you want to do, or because it benefits you to do. What ever your thoughts on this subject only you will truly know, what the relationships you cultivate mean to you. A true friend will love you anyway, there are many people that I have discovered don’t really care. True colours come shining through, in illness. It makes me so sad, people do for themselves and not the person that really needs them. Maybe because it’s convenient to them, and it’s of great benifit to them you maintain your friendship. There are people I love now, that I did not some 10 years ago. Why? Because they have been there no matter what, a shoulder no matter what. A friend no matter what. They have given to me not wanting reward, or anything in return. People like that are precious, people like that are for sure people that give strength in our fight. Treasure those that treasure you. Remembering that, what you give is not how much it cost, but whether it came from each your head or your heart. When someone gives from their heart, they are the Angels of the earth. People that don’t care if you are weak or strong. They are just there, and don’t mind if you are not strong. They just love you anyway. 

Thank you for being you, and allowing me to be a real person. Not expecting anything from me, it means a lot. Because I want to be who I truly am. Not strong all the time.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.

Copyright © 2016

Pain is a driving force.

Tags

blogging, faith, gain, giving, happiness, hope, love, pain, success

I heard this said by Ron Dennis in an interview with Martin Brundel. The once dominant F1 racing team, now paired with Honda, they have struggled and the two famous racing drivers, Fernando Alonso and Jenson Botton are struggling with them! Although totally committed. Using the pain of losing as a tool to carry on, could this be something we could use In a cancer fight? That was what my thoughts led to, did I actually use my pain as a driving force to beat cancer. Well for sure I did and it’s a way many more could use to beat it to, that the pain is a way of encouragement and not discouragement. 
It is what I have done the whole way though cancer, used pain as a way of overcoming the pain; caused by the cancer treatment. But how would I communicate that with you, how would I explain that.

  
 Well it’s like this, for me I have wanted my journey to be documented, so that none of what I have faced in cancer has been wasted. So because I was in effect explaining how I felt, what I was experiencing in the hope it would help someone somewhere. It meant I had the pain for a reason. That pain had become useful a vehicle even, to benefit others through the very pain I was experiencing. Effectively because of what I have been feeling it has a positive effect on you the reader.

Because it is now seen, that the treatment that of course I had an option to have or not have. Has cured me of the cancer that caused me to have this treatment, whilst the nerve damage is painful and even a permanent lead weight weighing me down. It’s almost worth it, because I am still here to share it with you. So what was the choice, die or live with pain. That’s it really, to just know that the journey we are given is for a reason. I don’t know what your situation is in your life, or what you have faced and will face. What I do know is though, is that I have chosen to use my seemingly negative journey to bring hope to others that fight. It was never certain that I would make it, it was never guaranteed that my treatment would work. But I am certain that my attitude to it was part of winning the battle, and it’s my job to tell you that by saying the word can and believing you will not fail certainly gives you the best chance  of success. 

  

Don’t think I have not had days that I wanted to give up, to throw in the towel so to speak. I DID.  You don’t have to either, you can. Speak life to yourself. It’s a choice how to use what you are experiencing. Let me know what you think? What ever you think, what you go through today can help the people of tomorrow. If you let it.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.

Copyright © 2016

Bloggers I love.

Tags

author, award, bloggers, giving, help, hope, love, recomended, selfless

Bloggers I love, that I have found to be selfless this week.

  
http://marieabanga.wordpress.com
One of the kindest bloggers to walk the planet, an encouraging soul that just wants to give to the world.
Sometimes I may only find one, but this week I found 2 in particular.
Also 
http://kwoted.wordpress.com
This lady does her best to encourage those around her, I thought she was a very kind hearted individual.
http://firefly465.wordpress.com
Although this blogger is new Adele is most certainly someone who is for you not against you. Someone who is selfless and provides informative information to her fellow bloggers wanting nothing in return.
That’s who I found this week, I wonder if you will be in the bloggers I love blog next week. 
Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.

Copyright © 2016

Giving. Is it a gift.

Tags

a gift, agape, beauty, giving, grace, gracious, love, perfect

So as someone recovering from cancer, I find small things mean more to me than big things. But why do people find it so hard to give you a little love, when you need it. Well I have come to the conclusion, to give from your heart is a gift. A gift given to you  when we were created. You have heard the expression, are you a giver or a taker. I concider myself a giver, I find it quite easy to bear my heart and to exspress how I feel, surely it’s a gift? because I have not had to work at it in any way. Writing just happens for me. All I have to do is be a willing vessel. It’s funny though isn’t it how some folk only like a particular post when it’s something they like personally. Don’t people like a post because it may mean something to someone else. I find religious people get hung up on their own religion as apposed to accepting all people from all walks of life. 

  
Well that part has not been an easy ride, I believee ALL people whatever their belief deserve the gift of giving. That’s why I write because you, (the reader) you are what you are right. I accept you, I accept you as you are. Some people I have met in the blogging world are broken people and do not know where to turn, desease has put them where they are. Generally home bound, or to and from from hospital, it’s funny how a couple of friends on here I think about a lot. Dray0308 and Michael33 they are both givers from their heart and what motivates them is to give to others where they are at. Not judge them for where they are at.

My way is to give, sometimes it comes back. But mostly I have to believe by faith that some how somewhere someone has heard a message someone greater than me wants to say to someone. To give unconditionally is called love, Gods love is perfect and called Agape. I hope with all my heart you are blessed today, that you find it in your heart to give to someone that which has been given to you as a gift. The gift of giving that you did not even know that you had. 

 
When you don’t exspect anything in return, that’s when you feel real joy when someone stops by and says “thank you for sharing” that’s when I get my gift.

Thanks for reading

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.

The picture.

Tags

gift, giving, helping, kindness

Wow, isn’t it amazing how generous people are, what happens because you happen to. I was minding my own business the other day and I came across a picture a photographer had taken. It amazed me, not because of the subject or where it was taken but because of what you could not see. That made all the difference to me. Because my life is all about what not having a life could be like. I have dedicated myself to loving others each hour, and each day I have the pleasure to live. So I compliment and encourage folk along the way where I can. I could just see that this person was dedicated to each picture as I am to each person (if that makes sense)

May I introduce you to Tony Harrat,     https://thefujifreak.wordpress.com/    my friend who has been so amazingly kind in sending me this picture that he took in the Snodonia national park.

  
Little did I know that our paths in life, have been touched in similar ways. Not only that but we live in the same part of the world. Maybe we will meet one day, who knows. What I found amazing about this phot was that you can’t really see the trees branches unless you look at the reflection. Look where it has managed to grow aswell. 

This post is about human kindness, and the fact that Tony decided to give me permission to use this photograph, both personally and possibly to raise money at an event for cancer research. Moments like this are rare in life arnt they, Tony does not have a web site so I have encouraged him to set one up. Thank you Tony for your kindness, and bringing me some happiness.

Remember human kindness is such an amazing gift, I wonder if you will give something of yourself to a total stranger today and pay it forward. I hope so, it brings depth to your life, and a happiness only the giver will understand.

Have a great day

– Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.

Bloggers that encourage.

Tags

bloggers, encouraging, giving, help, humility, kindness

Every week whilst I  meet people online, I have been looking out mainly people that I did not know. People that seem to blog because they have but one motive, to encourage and reach out to other people. Here are the people I have found this week, people that are there selflessly and not for stats, or hits, or  their own gain. But selfless kind people that get overlooked. It’s my hope that every week  I am able to share links of these type of people. 

If you yourself find someone you think is worthy, please draw them to my attention?
https://www.visionofpoets.wordpress.com
https://www.bmonshelldraw.wordpress.com motivation health and wellness. 
https://www.bmobshelldrawer.wordpress.com/2016/01/26/how-to-keep-your-memory-alive/
http://www.Kaitkingthewriter.wordpress.com said wonderful things about her sister 
http://www.lilisr.com/
http://www.breakawayfromsorrow.wordpress.com
A very nice blog of poetry, filling the world with positivity

https://dizzylizzie72.wordpress.com

helping others is her tag line. If your having issues she sure understands.

Not really that good at sharing links just yet, but I hope to get better. 

To be a person that gives selflessly,you make the world a better place, there are many more we need to acknowledge. But for now I want to thank all the people that have their links in this blog. You help people be positive and to carry on, that’s a great thing. I don’t take part in these awards people seem to nominate you for. But I did want go find a way to recognise others in the form of a weekly blog.

So here you go, this is my contribution for the people making a difference in people’s lives. Please if you have any feed back on this blog, this post, or even on me. Please feel free, maybe you think I could do something different that would help in next weeks post. Thanks for reading and I hope you gain something from the blogs I have included here.

Have a great week

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.

It’s taken Dedication.

Tags

cancer, giving, healthy, love, pain, passion, time, together

It’s a tough old challenge to make happen some times, I set it for myself. To blog everyday for 365 days straight, I am still on target although I am having a bit of a break this weekend. I hope you don’t mind, but my wife has the weekend off so I am going to spend it with her. We are going to hold hands, walk, talk, eat, and generally enjoy spending time together.

I think it’s vital to make sure that my marriage remains healthy. It’s all very well taking on a challenge that huge. But Andie is my world and not to be neglected.  She got her last management feedback last nigh before entering into the executive world. I could not be more proud. That lady has helped me though cancer in a year and maintained an impeccable record working full time. Now there is one amazing girl. I am incredibly proud of her, and whilst she won’t like me putting it out there, it won’t change that I am proud of her.

  
It’s time for us now and I am gonna enjoy it, it’s rare she has time off call, faithy is coming to. I will take some pictures today and no doubt blog about where we have been and what we have done later. Until then, have a great day everyone. Don’t forget the people that love is in our daily lives, they are after all the people we have chosen to love forever. Whilst I love blogging, and all you bloggers that have decided I am value enough for you to follow. We all have lives and people that we need to give to in the physical. 

Have a great day

Fonz

  http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.

Giving a little, can mean so much.

Tags

cancer, Cancer stories, given, giving, happiness, health, hope, love, reap what you sow, Rita

Yesterday. I wrote about a lady I met called Alice. It was amazing seeing all the comments from around her home town and indeed from around the world. Just how many people were liking reading about her. But why has writing about her been read by so many, it is without question the best day for views my blog has ever had. Why because of a lady who wanted me and my wife to meet her family. I won’t mention Nichola by name but (oops) it’s funny how a chain of kindness had lead to so much happiness.

How just writing a few words, can have such a profound effect on so many people. I can’t tell you how many messages I responded to but it was allot, I just love the circle of life how when we bless someone it blesses us in return. You may not see what your kindness does, but it is a fact that people love hearing about people’s lives. That’s why this is your life did so well I guess, people love to hear good things and great stories.

   

Giving in this selfish world I guess, is unusual. Everybody rushing around trying to make a decent living, undercutting people, making sure that their lives are the best they can be. But I think today has revealed one of life’s secrets, something I have believed for a long time. Me and my wife live by one sentence “you reap what you sow” we can kinda see my blog as sowing seeds daily.m All I have in my head every time I blog is “encourage someone” nothing else. I am finding it amazing how because I am doing this everyday.mi never don’t post. I am committed to doing it for 365 days we are on day 203.

  
Watching a video made by Clare Blackburn and all of the comments people have taken time to write was so special, but this is just the start for me. I have beaten cancer twice and feel fortunate to be alive, my intention is to bless people everyday of the life that remains. It’s like a mission that I am on, to affect people’s lives, to make a difference. To help people to see light where there is darkness, to enjoy seeing faces light up when they are blessed. I just hope it’s infectious and others start to do the same like in the movie paying it forward. Spread a little love

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. It took me an hour to write, but will take you a second to share.

Your first step.

Tags

belief, encouragement, faith, finding, giving, hope, love, reality, remembering, together

My journey learning continues, it’s amazing how some people on this planet can amaze us. It’s generally the people with less that give the most. The people that have exsperiences of having nothing, or having to fight like there is no tomorrow. I am finding out that true love comes from a pure and grateful heart. In our group Cancer stories 

https://m.facebook.com/groups/1595998743956536

I am finding that the love in people that have and are suffering is relelntless, it’s never ending. Why? Because we know how much something small means. We know how much a small amount of encouragement meant to us. I continue to blog every day about the stuff I am learning, so that the hope I have in my heart may touch 1 person a day, that’s all I want. That someone has a new start, or a change of heart maybe, or is reminded of what’s important in life. That someone somewhere has the drive to carry on, that someone is encouraged to maybe encourage someone themselves. 

  
You see we are all winners if we search our hearts and give with the compassion we have ALL been given. I choose as I live to do my best to give something to someone that only I can give, you are the same. As in, only you can do what you do. We are all special people, from shop keepers to surgeons we all have a place. We all have a space in society that’s ours. What we give is relative to what we have, but does not everyone have compassion. I think so, it’s just the people who have been through the mill (so to speak) realise maybe more than others what gifts they have within them. 

  
A journey starts with a step, it involves tanacity and selflessness. I have been woken up to write this blog, no idea why.  My journey in blogging started with one sentence. “I am a cancer fighter, and I will win” I did not know I would win the battle again but I believed it with my whole heart and stepped out in faith believing I would. Are you willing to do that, to step forwards into the seeming darkness. To move forward, even though there is uncertainty. When ever I sit down to write I never know what will be written only a word sometimes, or a statement that I hear or say myself is the begining of what I write. What happens if I don’t sit down and write it, you will never have read these words. You may never have been spurred on to fight what is your fight. Be it cancer, anxiety, or something else. We can all be achievers, you really can you have just got to make the first step. Then keep moving forwards as you find your own way.

  
You are more amazing than you are aware of, that first step will take you on a journey of discovery. But that’s up to you, you and only you can make that choice.

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Determination.

Tags

belief, best, determination, energy, faith, family, friends, giving, hope, love

Your will and desire to overcome? Is it a choice, or is it part of your nature? What makes someone want to carry on or even have the drive to carry on? Well here is my experience of it, what I think and how I have managed to maintain my determination. 

  
For me it’s about happiness, it’s about love and enjoyment. When you have spent quality time with quality people that have a quality mindset or as one of my best friends says (Proper people) your desire to want more of that in life changes. For me it makes me determined to make sure my cancer does not return, making sure I eat well, that I have a nutritionally balanced diet. That life is quality in all areas, I was having a conversation with my Andie today. I was saying how I must never have to go in isolation ever again, I got quite upset thinking that if I did what I would miss out on. The company of my good friends, the quality moments that allot of us take for granted. The nice things in life that we all enjoy, the peace, the feelings that others give to us because they care about us. We can’t change the actions of selfish people that only think for themselves, but we can make sure the friends we have are quality. 

  
It’s funny you know, how people have been towards me having cancer. It’s also amazing how good Some people have been, people tend to bless good people. I am for sure a blessed man, I write this knowing the people in my life now are there for a reason, and the ones that are not in it now because they have chosen not to be, have no place in my future anyway. The good people I have met give me energy, they help me to stay determined to keep cancer at bay. I always say if a friend does not make your life better then they were never a friend in the first place. 

  
So my conclusion, for me there has to be something to look forward to in life, there has to be a reason. There has to be something that drives us every day to remain determined. This blog you are reading right now helps me be determined because I know that others are touched by it. We had a dinner party last night for our anniversary, we were with Proper people. People that gave me energy and I hope we did them to. It’s about doing our best, and being the best you there is. One thing is for certain I am more determined than I ever was to remain cancer free. I have to much life to live, and to much love to give. I cannot and must not get ill again. The people I speak of in this blog know who they are, the ones that have turned their backs on us know who they are to. 

  
Friends are the family we choose, they help us to remain positive and determined.

Choose well.

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Help yourself.

Tags

cancer, Cancerstories, future, giving, help, helping, hope, kimd, love, reflection, yourself

What’s the point in knowing the answers and doing nothing about it. It’s a shame you know, how some folk always have someone else to blame. It’s never the fault of the person, it’s always the system at fault or such and such a bodies fault. Well how about, it’s our life and the buck stops with us. If we don’t help ourselves how will we be the best we can be. The NHS is filled with people that don’t help themselves, people that are not thinking about anything else apart from what they want. The booze, fags, kebabs, fatty foods. I am horrified to say I was one of those people, one of the people that went out on a Thursday, a Friday,Saturday, and Sunday night. Yup that was unfortunately my life, maybe I craved it because I was sheltered from it as a child growing up. Maybe I thought it was cool, but what ever way you cut it I did not help myself.

  
 Helping yourself starts with liking, then loving who you are. Looking in the mirror and respecting yourself enough to want to become a better person. To love yourself enough that you can help someone else. I know what it’s like to be on both sides of the fence, But I do now know that to love yourself is like the most precious gift you can give to yourself. There is no way of doing stuff to benefit your future If your in self destruct mode. The other thing is people don’t see you as a friend, they see you as a burden. The only way to improve life is by starting with you, but believing in you and treating yourself well. Stop giving yourself a hard time, start giving yourself you time. Time where you can find the real you, the you that’s beneficial to others.

  
I actually went out looking for me, I travelled from one side of Oz to the other giving myself time to think, cogitate and reflect on who I really wanted to be. Finding the true inner me with no distractions, just me and the road so to speak. I found who I didn’t want to be and who I wanted to be. I found I had qualities that I never knew were there. When I was in a good place, a place where I not only believed in myself, but loved myself to. That would be the time to meet the girl that is now my wife, it’s great to be a part of a team where we can always find something positive to say and do. But all we now do is to be a better us, not a richer or wealthier us. A better us, when you decide to be better it’s like a miriacle happens. You see the world in a different light, because you don’t think selfishly. You start to think of situations in others shoes. You start putting yourself in their situation so you can understand better where they are at.

  
All of the above and much more helps us to keep our mental health good, hey I am not saying we have it right, but I am saying that we have it better . It’s about waking up and being a better person today than yesterday, it’s about not looking at the circumstances. But concentrating on the part of you, that you want to improve. The circumstances will always be there, the excuses will always be there. Your choice is what will you choose to get in your way, or what will you choose to overcome. It’s all about mind set and the choices you make. Be kind to yourself.

  
Have a great week.

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
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Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Today is a gift.

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belief, believing, Belive, empathy, fear, gift, giving, healing, hope, life, living, love, motivation, self, today

I am remembering a story I was told as a child, a parable about a blind man. Jesus put mud on his eyes . After removal of the mud, the man could see. This is a bit like me now, knowing what it’s like to have cancer makes you see the world differently. It’s like you have been blind but you can see again. I saw life very differently before I had cancer, maybe even thought I was indistructable. I did not ever think that the man that I was would become so ill. I never thought I would have to fight for my life. 

  
One thing I always believed though, was that I would win. Don’t get me wrong I had days even weeks where I felt I would not make it, but I always believed with Faith no matter how hard it was. I know my friend Deanna watches my journey as I do hers, we have both been on a similar journey both beating cancer twice with similar attitudes to life. You can’t feel what we feel unless you have had to fight like we have. Beating it twice makes the world seem like a different place, I am still here with a life. 

  
What am I trying to say, well I want you to know that life after cancer, is like have the mud removed from your eyes. It means you can see again, we imagine our future very differently to life before cancer that’s for sure. Compassion is more real, love is more meaningful. Family becomes more important, things become irrelevant. Whilst at the same time appreciating what you have. One thing I do know is, that my life needs to benefit others daily. My life needs to help others, after all I would have been dead without the fight that’s now behind me. 

  
Parts of me are glad I have been touched by cancer, to enable me to see life in this new positive way. I have always been positive, but it’s a different  kind of positive now. It’s a place where I see the good in nearly all situations, a place where I am grateful to have what we have. I am pleased to see the sunshine or the rain, what ever happens it’s a new day and the past is behind us. We can only change who we are today, it’s the only day we have. That’s how I see life now, that today is a gift. That today is more special with you in it, your reading this because you have a life. Because you are living your gift, don’t you think that’s amazing.

  
Well  be amazed because you are amazing. But you have to believe that. You have to look in the mirror and tell yourself that. God knows I have made mistakes, I still do.  Am grateful to be alive, and I hope you are able to see a snippet of what today really means.

Enjoy today,

Mark

Why I share my storey.

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battle, cancer, chemo, chemotheropy, giving, hope, lost, love, war, winning., won

Morning, how are you today? It’s a funny old place to find yourself, having a storey to tell. My mind is full of gratitude for the NHS. My heart is full of gratefulness to have beaten cancer again, I feel a love towards others fighting. My heart is to help other people get checked out and hope they get into remission as well. Everyone that has faced cancer, are some of the bravest people on earth. Pioneers emerge like “Steve Prescott” Although Steve lost his life after the pioneering surgery, his name will live on because he was willing to put himself under the knife, in turn paving the way for others lives to be saved.  I love hearing about people like that, people that have a giving heart. I was getting a take away yesterday, and the LEP was there on the counter. With our storey in it, the man said to me “that’s you isn’t it” “how much you get for doing that” he said.

  
It was like someone had stuck a pin in me, I did not even think of making money out of the article. Only that I hoped a life would be saved. That’s all I want, for others to exceed the life expectancy by stepping forwards, fighting and winning. No one but the cancer sufferer knows how hard cancer is, and like my dear friend at the Indian said ” I didn’t know what chemo was until my dad had it” it’s time for unity. Time for us all to pull together no matter what our religious beliefs. It’s time to stand together, to work together to help more people choose to beat cancer. 

  
It is a choice after all, after diagnosis the person chooses to take what life is left for them or to have the gruling treatment. Obviously I chose to be treated and WON, I am not in persute of financial gain. Just the look on a persons face that says “I won” you see when you have won many battles to eventually win the WAR. It consumes you, it energises you to want that for others. I want to encourage you today, what ever your facing. That you have what you have, so use it to benefit someone else. Give without wanting anything in return. You will be blessed but maybe not with a new Ferrari. Maybe it’s life with out cancer will be your gift, you won’t find out unless you stretch out your arm to help someone else.

  
Of course there will always be that person that thinks about how much. But remember that’s how that persons brain works, we learn to be compassionate. Then we choose to be compassionate or not, allot of people are driven by money. I was guilty of it to before I realised that no matter what life is the most precious gift of all. What will you do with yours? 

  
Giving is such a selfless thing to do.

Have a great day

Mark  

love

Tags

belief, bible, concern, consideration, dogs, emothion, faith, fiendships, friendship, giving, insight, living, love, loved, lover, loving, quality, religeon, warm

I am writing a book, it’s been on the go for sometime. Unfortunately I keep making excuses not to pick it up again and really get stuck in. Not something I want to be doing in here anyway really. I am here to heal and beat Cancer. Today I am going to talk with about love made perfect. What perfect love is and how some of us aim for that goal and some just give up on it.

What does love mean to me? Love is unconditional, it just gives. It does not count how much something  costs, rather gives you overwealming joy to give love to someone everyday.

We have a dog she’s called faith

She is 1 of the rare pink nosed beasts. My brother also has a dog named coco Chanel, I call her hippo as she is allowed to gobble anything in her walk, after eight mints, cat food, treats often. Then we have this fine beast you see before you, well trained. Obedient and ball focused, she loves other dogs and does not try to dominate other dogs rather just love them. I think coco loves faith but not in quite the way that faith loves coco.

The love I am trying to exsplain though is nothing Like what coco thinks is love towards her cousin faith. These are 2 girls and coco has not realised that putting herself on faith is the right way, although it’s her way. Both girls need to be loved and are loved. Both are unconditional. Just I am not so sure both parties feel appreciative of the method. We all in life have different ways to show how we care. Show how we love.

“Love cures people,both the ones who give it, and the ones who receive it” Dr Karl Menninger

It’s clearly exsplained to us what love is in 1 Corinthians 13 of the bible (basic instruction before leaving earth) my friend Jimmy, sends me everyday some words of encouragement. He does not want anything in return. He gives freely his words as a gift from him to me. Which everyday has a knock on effect, and encourages me to write here blogs everyday.

As a Cancer suffer for some 7 years I have learned that we ( the sufferer ) can use this Cancer to benefit and encourage others. We are after all people on the same rd. the hardest people to love though are the ones that don’t see eye to eye with us. Love them anyway, try not to judge them. Just love them anyway. Don’t speak of it, bring them a coffee in the office every morning. Surprise them by being nice. I am always saying to my wife “it’s nice to be nice” be nice to that guy and love them without condition. The bible speaks of a statement that I follow.

  
 “You reap what you sow” I sow allot but reap sometimes. Cancer does not have to be a curse we can use it to bless others. In the heamatology ward at southport they have a drinks machine. When I go in for bloods ect I always go and speak to every person on the MDU and ask them if they need a coffee or tea. We Engadge in chatter if they like to. But no matter what happens I just love to see the smiles as my own heart gets warmed as well by doing such a menial thing. Finally perfect love CASTS out all fear. This is called agape. Google it and see for yourself.

I hope you have had a smile whilst reading this today, if you enjoyed it. Why not mail it to your friends to have a read. No one has passed my blogs on by mail as far as I am aware but I would appreciate it. Let’s make a domino effect of loving people today.

You in?

Mark