Plucky Brits, a few people with an idealism are not going to change us. Your messing with the wrong people if you think we are going to roll over and let you sley us with your cowardly actions. We will always stand with each other when it comes down to it. When we need each other we are there for each other.
Tonight I am watching truly brave people, not just the people that are standing with Manchester but the people that have gone to that concert. Showing unity, solidarity, love, compassion, and a kindred spirit. People joining together to say “WE” to say “Together” to say “we are one” people that were at the concert, people who have been affected by hate. personally I feel a sense of pride and passion for my fellow Brit. You live in a special place, your connected to special people. You see our flag is not a few colours thrown together it’s ‘GREAT BRITAIN’ you take from us. We will be there for each other and I personally think that’s amazing.
You see in my mind is far more powerful to love your fellow man than to hate him or her. To give is better than to take. I have written in my posts in the last 2 years often about paying it forwards and loving each other. Even as I faced the worst days of my life I always felt to love our fellow man was better than the opposite.
Ariana. Grande has stood tonight after a horrific tragedy created through hate and 50,000 people responded by going to a concert organised at the last moment as a sígn that we are not alone.
Saffie Rose Roussos is with us no longer sadly taken but for sure her name will be said many times in years to come. That young girl lived in our village, but we stand together with love for each other. NOT hate. Hate is born of the devil and we are born of one far stronger. The Bible means ‘Basic Instruction Before Leaving Earth’ it teaches us that GOD is Love. Then surely to love another is done because you have life.
So I say and give you this, do something in love is the very best gift of all. Love always wins over all.
Fonz
Bless someone, by sharing. You never know who needs to read this.
In life sometimes we just have to accept who we are, and who we are not. When you have had the battles that cancer fighters have even a small achievement is better than no achievment what so ever. So today my challenge having arrived at 11.29 at a walk that set off at 11-20 was to play catch up. Me and faith were keen, faith (my lab) was excited. She does this whining when she is excited, she jumps up and down, with her tongue out. Even though I sent her on ahead, to follow the trail ( I made her smell the car of one of the walkers) she led the way for me but never let me out of her sight, it was to amount to nothing however. So why am I blogging about this, well it’s because when you are faced with cancer you place goals in your mind. You hope that one day just one day that there may be some level of the normality that once was. I personally hoped to make new friends and to befriend people with new perspectives. You see, when someone (anyone) gets cancer. People show true colours they tend to not understand what you face and that has a result of loneliness. People show you how much you mean to them by the actions they make towards you. The commitment some people show towards you in your time of need is humbling. But there are not many that stay by your side, most don’t understand and leave you to deal with it alone.
I remember being in that room imagining the very walk I endeavoured to do today, you know uphill with running streams and fallen trees and wildlife although I never envisaged cows. But there were.
I was hopeful I could take some great shots today and make some memories, to get better at using my IPhone whilst enjoying other people’s company. Now those that know me know I have a lot of pain killers and today I took 90mg of codine to enable me to be able to walk. I had food and water and was prepared for a walk. I was told it was an easy walk and I would have no problem. However the night before my friend (he’s the type of friend that carlsberg would make) if they made friends. He told me it would be to much, the lakes is for seasoned walkers he said. Of course I am a beginner in every sense. As I moved forwards as fast as I could I slipped and fell and hit my head, fortunately I was wearing my trappers hat. I realised right there and then, the condition of my body is such that things like this are beyond me. I sat on a stone and knew that I had higher expectations of myself than were actually possible. It filled me with sadness and I don’t mind saying I even shed a tear as I sat there. Faiths head on my lap, even her eyes said “Dad its to soon”
It was with regret that I turned around and began to face what I had not allowed myself to do before. Accept I was not able, and whilst I had been wildly eager and went against all the advice of all the people that know and love me. I then had to accept that I needed to do lesser walks. Steep slopes are not within my capabilities, with a lump in my treat I headed home. No phones were in service and hope was gone.
As I walked back I took a couple of pictures to remember where I had been.
Some of you know I love pictures and that they speak to me, this photo speaks of life. That this little river I was stood in was going somewhere else to where the walkers were going. It was somewhere different to where the walkers were going where it flowed to and maybe my path although different. Would still have a meaning somewhere, I didn’t give up I got there, me and faith shared time together and whilst I feel like I have failed in some way, we did get onto the hill.
So what’s the punch line, well it’s this.
” what ever you think in your mind, where ever that is. Remember that just because it does not end up how you imagined, that does not mean you failed at something. It’s just different. ” our paths even though we choose them, don’t always end up the way we had planned. But what’s important is that we have a goal, and in doing something you will achieve something. I mean this blog for a start, will be written forever and will encourage someone somewhere. That’s because today did not go to what I had planned. So already there is something positive. You just read it.
Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)
It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.
Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them hereby to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
My names Mark, Fonz to my friends. My story isn’t a A heart wrenching one or anything, it’s just my life. A life I never expected to live. I always had plans to be a dad some day, but with the right girl. The girl that made me quiver, the girl that loved me for me. I was not especially good looking normal I guess, mr average although not in all departments. I always thought I would be a high achiever. Live in an above average house, not that the house was big, just that it would be full of love. One song I can’t forget was ‘feel’ by Robbie Williams.
I always dreamt of feeling the feeling of love in the home that we live in. My first marriage was born out of hate, a bomb in Ireland my girlfriend bk than was stood 10 feet from the bomb when it blew. We married and love was born out of a tragic bomb that affects people’s lives today and will forever. Married life failed. Back then I wanted to end the hopes and dreams, I felt as though I should die . Leave you all behind as it were. I decided to travel instead to look for my Mrs right. To have some fun whilst doing it, I drank to forget. When I drank I was numb,numbed by the alcohol. I lived and did things I loved. Went to Sydney on New Year’s Eve, Brisbane at Christmas. Travelled New Zealand. Along the way I turned down life long dreams. Swimming with dolphins, seeing a glacier, many things that I wanted to do with a true love. I did go to an F1 grad prix in Melbourne though and came home soon after. Tears rolled as I flew back to GB.
I moved to Manchester. Where I met some amazing people, but one I met in the most unlikely of places on the most unlikely night. A night out with a friend, a different pub and there she was. Blonde hair, the most amazing smile and sourounded by men. I whispered in her ear ( I will be back when your boy friend is gone) I then flicked her hair into her face. That was the start of our lives together, the girl I had gone around the world looking for was there. You know, the one that makes your heart melt. The one that’s for you.
We worked hard, moving into a really little semi detached house after 4 years renting a big terrace. Then losing her mum to cancer so suddenly it shook us both. 4 years later we moved to Preston where we now live. Little did we know what was ahead. 1/4/2011 we moved in June 2011 I was told I would die with out treatment diagnosed with cancer. July I started treatment. They told me I would become infertile so I had to store some boys. Swimmers or sperm to the medical among you. I did, and hoped one day I would be able to use them after the fight to beat cancer. 6 months of treatment, chemo every 2 weeks. We had Christmas together 2011, friends disowned us. Family did not understand. Our fight carried on, until I started to get better, work again, the extension I started when diagnosed was finished. I started to do bits in the garden, help a friend, my energy came back a little and we bought our dog faith.
Faith was my shadow, a wonderful dog. She still comes with me where ever I go, and loves her dad like no other. For me she would do anything.
Ah but then I have to say, she licked me on my neck, again and again and barked at me often. She was telling me it’s back, my cancer had come again. A Bone marrow transplant, a tiny room. All the time believing my deposit would be used one day. 18 months ago I had that transplant weak though I still am and not able to work full days, we hoped that IVF would be given to us. My wife was 39 but got to 40 when we had our appointment, we were told we would be able to go ahead to now eventually have a child. A gift from God, although stored by me and saved in the nitrogen bank.
Then that day, the letter came. No it said, your wife’s to old and you should have tried earlier. You are not able to have children. But not giving up we made an appeal, supported by phycologist doctors and reports. Yet still the answer is no. Is it?
That’s when we decided to let our beloved faith have pups.
So here we are, that’s where our journey has led us.
Meet our puppies that will get a new home. But also our blonde girl Lilly Hope. Our new blessing.
Ps, I have committed to doing this for 365 days every morning, what I ask of you is that you share these i make on email, facebook twitter, you can affect people by pressing a button. Please do that. I asked ppl to share yesterday 18/05/2015 at 8pm they did and 100 people saw my blogs in 2 hours. It only takes a click or two.
Our support group on our FB
Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)
It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. I
Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone
else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
Strange statement some may think, but it is true that people suffering illness get tired of being strong. Continually smiling at those that don’t really care about you. They just ask how you are to make themselves feel better. Maybe they feel they are doing a good turn. They ask a person recovering from cancer how they are “how are you”? They say. They don’t mean it, they don’t come and have fun and laughter knowing the person still suffers but bringing at least some happiness. For some they ask for themselves, so they can say they asked how the person was. Well I am tired of those people that don’t really care, the people that do for show. I am sad that people don’t ask and mean it, I am sick of meaningless chit chat. I would rather no greeting than a fake question they want a “yea great,how about you”?answer. I am tired of appearing strong for them. Those people that never send a text or phone. But ask you when they see you, because it’s convenient. Do they really care? Are they bothered really? If so why do they never visit, why do they say words but have no actions.
I have people in my life that love me, they know they love me and I feel it. Others know they should do, but they don’t because you are not as important as the things or people they regard as important. But I ask you this question. Are not some of those people that you regard as important, people that provide or give something to you. Or do you want nothing from them but they do anyway. Do you maintain relationships because you benifit from them, or do you show those that you love that you do for no reward. If you want nothing but still do, that’s true love. That’s unconditional love.
Please watch this short video, it says all this post is meant to be.
Unconditional love for another, is one of the most precious actions a person can be. Do you do because you want to do, or because it benefits you to do. What ever your thoughts on this subject only you will truly know, what the relationships you cultivate mean to you. A true friend will love you anyway, there are many people that I have discovered don’t really care. True colours come shining through, in illness. It makes me so sad, people do for themselves and not the person that really needs them. Maybe because it’s convenient to them, and it’s of great benifit to them you maintain your friendship. There are people I love now, that I did not some 10 years ago. Why? Because they have been there no matter what, a shoulder no matter what. A friend no matter what. They have given to me not wanting reward, or anything in return. People like that are precious, people like that are for sure people that give strength in our fight. Treasure those that treasure you. Remembering that, what you give is not how much it cost, but whether it came from each your head or your heart. When someone gives from their heart, they are the Angels of the earth. People that don’t care if you are weak or strong. They are just there, and don’t mind if you are not strong. They just love you anyway.
Thank you for being you, and allowing me to be a real person. Not expecting anything from me, it means a lot. Because I want to be who I truly am. Not strong all the time.
Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)
It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.
Should you think your blog or someone else’s are a blog with a giving nature, tell me in the comments. If you think someone has a giving heart, someone that is selfless, out to help and better others lives. I WANT TO KNOW. I will publish my bloggers I love blog every Monday, so more people come to the site of choice. This blog is for others not me, to give something back to those selfless souls out there.
Please share those people, I really love making the world a better place and love people in it that make the world a better place. What’s better than loving your fellow man and wanting the best for your fellow man. We are after all, each and every one brothers and sisters.
Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)
It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.
So as someone recovering from cancer, I find small things mean more to me than big things. But why do people find it so hard to give you a little love, when you need it. Well I have come to the conclusion, to give from your heart is a gift. A gift given to you when we were created. You have heard the expression, are you a giver or a taker. I concider myself a giver, I find it quite easy to bear my heart and to exspress how I feel, surely it’s a gift? because I have not had to work at it in any way. Writing just happens for me. All I have to do is be a willing vessel. It’s funny though isn’t it how some folk only like a particular post when it’s something they like personally. Don’t people like a post because it may mean something to someone else. I find religious people get hung up on their own religion as apposed to accepting all people from all walks of life.
Well that part has not been an easy ride, I believee ALL people whatever their belief deserve the gift of giving. That’s why I write because you, (the reader) you are what you are right. I accept you, I accept you as you are. Some people I have met in the blogging world are broken people and do not know where to turn, desease has put them where they are. Generally home bound, or to and from from hospital, it’s funny how a couple of friends on here I think about a lot. Dray0308 and Michael33 they are both givers from their heart and what motivates them is to give to others where they are at. Not judge them for where they are at.
My way is to give, sometimes it comes back. But mostly I have to believe by faith that some how somewhere someone has heard a message someone greater than me wants to say to someone. To give unconditionally is called love, Gods love is perfect and called Agape. I hope with all my heart you are blessed today, that you find it in your heart to give to someone that which has been given to you as a gift. The gift of giving that you did not even know that you had.
When you don’t exspect anything in return, that’s when you feel real joy when someone stops by and says “thank you for sharing” that’s when I get my gift.
Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)
It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own.
Bless someone, by sharing. You never know who needs to read this.
Failure is not an option, speak life to yourself. I have blogged similarly before about “we are what we say we are” but isn’t it true that once we choose to love ourselves that we then find our life takes a different path. That things start to fall into place, rather than finding road blocks at every turn. It takes me back to a time in my life where I was a recovery driver, I was in turmoil with myself and made constant mistakes. I had quite a few accidents at that time in my life, looking back because I was not as considered as I am these days. But then I was not in a secure loving relationship like I am now.
For me it was impossible to attain what we have now until I loved myself, because how could I give myself to another when I quite clearly did not like who I was. It’s about choosing to take care of yourself, not only physically by eating well and excercising well which I did. It was about my mind, and spirits health to. It was a choice I had to make, I got into the wrong relationship and confused myself possibly. Sometimes we need to have a new focus, and in my exsperience it’s about putting others first. Making it about others and not yourself. It’s oh so easy to keep talking about me me me. But so much more of an effort to make it about others. Or is it?
On starting my blog in May this year, it became about using what I have learnt and choosing to be open and honest about my experiences with the world. To let others know that maybe what they (you) feel is felt by others as well. Thus maybe helping others to feel that it’s normal to feel what we feel in a possibly horrible situation. We are after all, unique people, yet we experience the same emotions. We feel the same sadness as others in completely different circumstances.
For example: last night we went to dinner with a couple from newyork. No names I will mention, but he was a fire chief. In charge of a battalion of 9 stations, I respect him greatly and is for sure one of life’s successful people. He’s a man that has been honed by many seemingly sad situations but has for sure used those situations to make himself a better man. A man that has allowed life to shape who he has become, making sure he blesses people on the journey we call life. I could go on telling you the stories that he told us, but maybe that’s not for today. The point is we all have sadness to deal with, but it’s our reaction to it that’s the most important. The way we deal with it that really matters.
We can proactively do what we can to make sure that the situation does not occur, but we cannot stop someone else’s actions. All we can do is respond in a good way, our responses are everything. If we are choosing to love ourselves daily, those around us will feel loved to. We effectively affect those around us spreading the love we share, it’s a great place to be.
Have a great week and I hope you choose to love yourself.
Mark http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.
Bless someone, by sharing. You never know who needs to read this.
As someone that has had cancer and beaten it TWICE! I am one of the few people on the planet that knows what it takes to beat it. My NO 1 thought has always been. “How much of me will cancer take from me” how much of me will be left after all the chemo and procedures are finished. Well the last procedure was done on Friday by having my pentamidine. I just have to have a lung function test done on Monday, then my dear friends reading this, then I will be walking free from cancer. I will leave southport hospital free from this dreaded disease, from all the things that’s needed to fight. I have slowly weened myself off of the medication and am out the otherside.
All the drugs leave you with kidney pain, chest pain, leg pain and nerve pain. But you know what non of that seems to matter. What matters is that the battle is now won. During the whole journey I have concentrated on going away with the lads as my end goal. To jump up and down together celebrating that this huge battle has been won. To see the smiles on the faces of the people that really care outside of my immediate family. To feel the freedom of being cancer free, and to share it with those that have been spurring me on.
This will happen 1 week after my last test, the feeling I have within me is amazing. The prayers that have gone up by the many thousands of people around the world, the miracle granted to me that’s called life. I am so thankful, grateful, and blessed to have this life. I only hope that the people that have read my journey have been able to relate it to thier own situation, struggles, and challenges that you have had to face whilst we have been fighting to beat cancer. My wife is shattered, totally spent emotionally. She has faced everything with me, even holding my hand when I have been on the brink of losing my life. She has helped me find the strength to carry on. As have so many people along the way, people I was not to exspect to help have been there.
I went to see 1 of those people the other day, I went and had a Brazilian coffee with him. His children really loved interacting with Faith, and the feeling of freedom and being cared about were prevalent in that visit. i felt as though it had all been worth it, that there was a reason for a fight to have been won.
Happy family day, that’s what Sunday is to me. A day when me and Andie try to be together enjoying each other, giving our time to each other. wow how amazing that we can even have a family day. In my journey beating cancer, I have learned what good people are, what selfishness there is in some people. I have learnt that people can surprise you. I have learnt that not everyone is prepared to send you a message to wish you well, even IF people have had bad motives I always have tried to wish them well. I am also finding some diamonds on my journey. I am finding there are a few people that we can lean on, people that are reigniting my positivity for folk. People that want the best for you, accepting your situation but looking at the person not the disease. People that I want in my future, and are welcomed with open arms, because there is no hidden agenda.
It’s now time for me to remove all the cotton wool and bubble wrap, to start to live a life whilst I continue to blog and encourage those still fighting what it’s like on the otherside of Cancer. You may be able to pick up my excitement and expectancy of the things we will enjoy. Also the places we will visit whilst enjoying being cancer free. I can’t say those words often enough.
Have a great week
mark
http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.
Bless someone, by sharing. You never know who needs to read this.
fonzandcancer blogging to encourage. 