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It’s 7pm and I am leaking again the pain is unbearable like having glass wounds all over the soles of my feet and hands not even my positive thinking is helping today . Feelings of negativity have flooded me again. It’s so hard to shun some days. Needing pain killers for an invisible condition no body sees. Yet still I continue to move forward to encourage and do my best. That seems absolutely fruitless some days.
I actually feel crushed. Such a positive person with so much to give should be slammed down like this. It’s hard to bare and wonder some days why the hell I had my treatment. Thoughts then turn to positive things.
You have to do your best to draw yourself back.
Thoughts of gratefulness and words said by a then near stranger “you maybe loud but your positivity and happiness is great and makes me smile”
The person does not need a name he knows. The point is that what you speak to others can be a blessing. Just one sentence can help to maintain your spirits and to help you Re focus.
So I want to say, if you think it and it can have a positive effect on others please please say what it is. It could be the foothold someone needs. You only truly know the true value of life when you have faced losing it.
It’s very cruel people can be treated then left with severe side effects for life. Yea I guess I am feeling sorry for myself a bit. Yet I am still doing my best to rise. Success for some would be to walk up stairs to others to rent a penthouse. Well for me it’s smiles on faces.
I am very privileged to know so many quality people.
What ever it is you do in your day. Make sure you say the words that will bless someone it really really does matter. just say it and choose to bless someone.
Your pain is a reminder your alive.
God bless you all and remember “ your more than what you have become”
Mark
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Hey, Mark. I haven’t been around much because I’ve been taking care of my dad. He just died two days ago, so now I’m preparing for the funeral on the 5th. I’m sorry that you’re going through so much, but I’m glad that you’re still trying to rise above. My best wishes to you.
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Louise please accept my sincere condolences that’s very very sad for you and your family. It’s hard to say but I am sure he has no pain now and for that it’s a good thing but no part of loss or grief is good. Many many happy memories to recall I am sure and I hope you find comfort in all you did and not focus on what you have lost. Much love to you with all our love Mark and Andie x x
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So sorry to hear about your dad! Your never alone and I am only a message away . Remember the best times they will help your grief process xx
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