Garlic Salve

https://nativesojourner.wordpress.com/2018/01/14/garlic-salve/

Anything that helps us keep cancer away can only be a good thing right.

This is good stuff.

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Acceptance.

How’s your Christmas been? Have you had a good New Years celebrations? It’s not all been good for us, although we have been reminded what’s truly important for our health. Today I have found myself feeling low, due to my expectations. As I drove back from my shopping trip yesterday I found myself depressed at the situation. As what I hoped for had not met my expectations. You see I am the type of person that wants to give, a person that wants to provide and encourage people to enjoy what they do with us. I was driving slowly, well below the speed limit as it’s not good for me to drive to my mood despite the power of the car I drive.

As I drove I found myself praying, that possibly I might find some answers as the day went on. It’s surprising where answers come from in our lives, that when we need them and ask for them they do indeed come. M

My last blog post was about having higher standards, that something may have been right at a certain point in time, but that there is nothing wrong with having a higher standard in the future. We have lived in places close to the city in the past, noisy neighbours are one of my pet hates. People that do things without a thought for other people, yet I have had to question my standards. That maybe I am being to fussy or possibly petty about certain things. That possibly I should lower my standards, that people’s reactions or attitudes are not mine, and just because someone decides to behave in a certain way. How could I stop that from annoying me so much. Why would I even let someone else’s actions affect my life, this was my prayer that I would find a way to overcome others actions and for it not to affect me, or possibly infect my own standards.

It does not matter where you live on this planet, unless your budget is multi millions of pounds, you will always have a compromise. But how do you stop that from annoying you and affecting your state of mind. I don’t know about the rest of the world only how I feel and how I respond to things. You see, I have a do mentality. Not a do later mentality. I have been called ‘the dream maker’ before now. Because for sure I love, oh so dearly love to make people happy. But not so much feel happy but to make them feel like their dream has been fulfilled.

Yet I found myself upset, a consequence it would seem of me having a certain standard.

I put my shopping down on the side and our friend who always comes on a Friday; asked if I was ok. I could not say yes and explained how I was feeling and how frustrated I felt. That I could not shake how I felt off. I was shocked at her response. “I was in cloud cookoo land she said. No one will live up to your standards, no one one in life should expect someone to. Instead we should just love what someone chooses to be. Unconditional love you might think, otherwise known as ‘Agape’

To accept what I can’t control is a new way of living for me, it’s different and requires change on my part. My blog that your reading has always been there to encourage others, yet I find myself every time I write being encouraged myself. But this post is particularly life changing. Because it means acceptance, acceptance of a situation and another’s actions.

People think I am the black sheep of our family, and possibly even a scape goat. But that’s not my fault, what is my fault is not accepting what I cannot change. I have found myself trying to change opinions, instead of accepting what people do. It’s caused me great turmoil in my life but for sure feel that my new way I will now learn of acceptance, and not trying to change what’s outside of my control will give me peace. Rest and possibly even lower my stress levels. Perhaps even lengthening my life. It makes me wonder how many other parts of my life I will be able to introduce this into. After all my dogs just accept me, they love me for who I am. They don’t want me to change, but I wonder if they would have a better life living a life of acceptance.

“Be the person your dog thinks you are”

Jesus loves us just the way we are, but to much to let us stay that way. Do you love yourself enough to change the way you deal with things in your mind. I know I do, and I am very pleased I have a friend that feels she can be honest with me.

Because from now on, I will accept what I cannot change. I will love where I can, and if people don’t like my honesty it’s quite obviously their problem and not mine. I am from now on accept another’s opinion, and not try to change it. Why is it important for people to see my point of view anyway. Others around us will only be happy when they accept what someone else chooses to do. Even if that is unforgiveness. Acceptance is part of loving, where it says in 1 Corinthians 13 about what love is. “Bearing no record of wrong” as a parent you have far more responsibilities in this area. So now it’s time to move on, leave the judgments behind and accept that we can’t change other people’s choices only our own. Acceptance means a willingness to accept a difficult situation that you are unable to change. What’s the point in trying to change what is not your choice.

It feels liberating!

Have a great weekend

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

@fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.

Everything you read aure better based on my own experipence and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleople share with others, if it meant something too you it will to someone

else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2018

Higher your standards.

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2017!

What Has that meant to you? Are you a better person at the end of 2017 than at the beginning? As you reflect on your year, have you had a good effect on the world. Or have you gone through the year just paying the bills going to work, to find you owe a little less on your mortgage than you did in 2016. Are you happy to step or do you want to stride. You know neither is wrong right? You know that what you choose to do is ok and that your choices are not wrong. Just different to everyone else’s.

What’s in your mind as you live each day? To get through it or to become a better you, to learn from the mistakes you may have made. Remember, if someone else thinks you made a mistake. Their standards maybe lower than yours, you may have a completely different way of thinking to them. Opinions are not wrong, because they are theirs and not yours.

I have made many mistakes this year, I have had personal struggles and for sure made efforts to be a better me. That means I may have moved on, or maybe had the same struggles over and over again because I have not highered my standards.

If we never higher our standards and always have the same ideas, we will just go round and round in the same circles as you always have done. At one point in my life I was happy with a tiny little stream, until the day I realised that it was as much work to look after a bigger pond than the tiny stream I had. We had a bridge, we still have the same bridge. It’s just that the area the fish have to swim in is a lot bigger. 5m long infact. Which actually is the exact length of the old one, it’s just it’s deeper and has a far bigger volume. We have fish in the new pond that were in the old one. But I like to think that they enjoy being in the bigger pond more than the small stream. We have moved forwards in my opinion, creating something better for the fish.

Because we have higher standards we are able to have bigger fish in there. It’s more enjoyable for us and hopefully more enjoyable for the fish also. I think quite possibly when we do have higher standards, that other people have a better time aswell. Yet my first stream was amazing, better than not having a stream right. So that’s my point. Doing something good is most certainly better than doing something bad. But what ever it is you do do, maybe it would be a good thing to improve on that in the future.

What you did this year may not have been bad, but for sure 2018 brings you new opportunities to be a better you. You have the chance to do something new, be someone better. To higher your standard is a special gift to the world and yourself. Yesterday will remain in history, yet today you have a chance to change your tomorrow.

My challenge to you is to be a better you than you were in 2018. I know that’s what I will do. I will exercise more, care more, love more and higher my standards. Will you?

Have a great 2018 and here’s to being better than we were, not accepting what we have become. But being a better us in 2018.

Happy new year everyone.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

@fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.

Everything you read are better based on my own experipence and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleople share with others, if it meant something too you it will to someone

else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

Thank you,

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Thank you all for being here, for your faithfulness in reading my posts in this blog. You all mean a lot to me. When I started this blog 2 years ago, I hoped that my writings would bless one person or perhaps even save a life. Well it’s done that and more, so why do I keep on writing? Because I am hungry for more people to be affected by positivity in cancer. That the choosing to do/write something makes a difference.

I always say to people, that doing something is so much more affective than just thinking about it. I think we can all say here that I do and don’t just talk about it. But yet I feel inspired because you read, because you reblog, like and comment on what I write. Many times like now I never know what words will be written and what order they will be written in. Many things have happened this year including the birth of Faiths puppies which has taught me so very much. That life’s precious and that there is no point in wasting this gift of life.

My advice this Christmas, don’t keep doing something if it makes you unhappy. Break free and be happy, even if your in a relationship where you don’t talk. Start talking, start saying nice things instead of making things worse. Say something nice even if you don’t feel like it, and appreciate what you have. Be happy for the haves, not the have nots. Because trust me where ever you are on the ladder of life, you will always have those choices.

Show respect to who ever it is that you meet, even if they are sat on the street. You can if you like do something for someone that did not expect it. Sometimes we don’t feel like doing, or loving even. But I say do it anyway. Bust open that thief called pride and start to appreciate what you have not the have nots. We all have and have not. So this Christmas I want to say thank you. Just that you are you, and that you encourage me to carry on by reading.

So merry Christmas to you and your family and I hope you all have an amazing time. God bless you all and thank you for all that share my thoughts to, it means a lot.

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

@fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.

Everything you read are better based on my own experipence and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

If only we all loved like dogs.

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What’s the importance of Love?. It’s a bizarre life. I mean are you important or is what you do THE most important. What you you do, is so much more important than the importance of who you are. Good people will be surrounded by good people. I once said to a friend, “it’s not about how many friends we have, it’s the quality of the people you call friends that matters”

The world is a complicated place if we make it that way. Yet, if we just did our best for everyone we have in our lives. It becomes not so much about us but what we do that matters the most. What matters is what we do with ourselves, blessing someone with what we have makes what we have important to someone.

It brings us to the story of the rich man and the poor old lady. They both gave at the church collection. One gave a seemingly large amount, yet compared to his wealth it was a drop in the ocean. The older lady gave ALL that she had. There was nothing more to give. Yet it seemed like she had been stingy compared to the rich man.

The point of that story today is to help you to realise, that when someone suffers what they give may seem small, but they may have given you everything they had. It’s difficult for some people to give a lot of their time, when it’s so painful to move. But when someone gives all they have, that’s such a special gift.

When it comes to love, what’s the point in loving if it’s not with your whole heart. My dogs never ever seem to let up in the love they show. It’s always everything they want to give me. Not a bit, then run off. They smother us with kisses and love never is it to much trouble, if only we were like that. That we love people anyway. Wouldn’t the world be a fabulous place.

To love someone without condition is a precious gift. What I have I give, because what’s the point in enjoying it to myself when I could be sharing.

Don’t hold back this Christmas period, life has shown me that life’s precious and what you do for someone else could really make a difference in our lives and more importantly theirs.

Have a great Christmas everyone, and enjoy your holiday. More importantly enjoy giving.

Have a great 23rd of December.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

@fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.

Everything you read are better based on my own experipence and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

Unheard Incantations: A Collaborative Poem

This is awesome.

Heartstring Eulogies

The following is a collaborative effort by myself and eight other writers. It’s always a pleasure to bring our minds together. Enjoy!

The words we cannot say
Will be wept
Into silence between us (CER)

Breathe deep, dear love;
Be still with me
Listen to my heartstrings
A song meant just for you (KMA)

Each tear
An eloquent elegy
To tortured truths (AP)

Each note played
On a hand carved lute
Strung with strips
Of my soul (JWL)

Your breathless aura
Beats in time
Undulating ululation
With my exhaled psyche (AP)

Intertwined, tangled,
Unified: whole
Healed. (JWL)

Yet with hearts torn open
Bleeding out the notes of our song
You turned from me (ME)

I am fire
Drowning
In desire
Weep
I beg
Save me (1W-W)

Fetch me an instrument,
For the untrained ear
Is soothed by that
Which it cannot comprehend. (LEL)

Not everything is black and white.
For…

View original post 83 more words

I feel like saying goodbye.

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I can honestly say if I knew life would be like this that I would not have had a transplant at all. I have been patient and although the doctors said I will be better after a 2 year period. I am not. Everyday I do my very best to be upbeat and helpful and encouraging to people. Yet I am sat here feeling sad with a lump in my throat. It feels unfair to go through so much and to give with your whole heart yet still feel like this. I know for sure other people will feel the same way but are afraid to be honest. Well I am if one thing, not afraid, everyday I stand when my body says no, everyday I smile when my body says cry. But some days like today, I have to allow myself the honesty to myself. Everyday I do my best yo lift others, but it’s not possible when I can’t (yup I said it) even lift myself. My spirit is torn and my mind wonders how long I can carry on feeling like this. I keep myself busy so as the pain depletes, you can’t feel pain whilst focused on something else.

Well pain, today you win. You have dragged me to the depths I did not feel possible. I have very strong pain killers, OxyContin and gabapentin. Sometimes I need two of each just to complete a day. What people’s opinions of me don’t seem to matter anymore. My dignity has been taken and another’s opinion has near no effect on me these days. What did I have the transplant for? To render me unable, to make me depressed. Well I fight both of those each day, aside of that encouraging others that they can as well. Because if I can you can right.

Yet although my honesty is unrivalled here, I still have a small smoulder that needs fanning to make the fire. So now even though all is seemingly against me! I will look for positives where I am unable to see. Not even the birds sing today, but like Job. I will rejoice anyway, I will say thank you for what has been given to me. Life where I should have non, warmth that I should not feel. Acceptance of what has been taken away and gratefulness for what I still have. This is a true battle today, one I must be grateful to have. Because without a battle, how can you win. Giving up means defeat, slumping because of the torment of pain. But NO I will not, I will win the battle and understand one day why it had to be won. Today I have the victory, because Jesus paid the price.

So with a thankful heart, and a grateful soul. I say thank you lord for the prickles, because without the prickles there would be no blackberries.

I hope you win your battle today to.

Smile at someone, you could help them find some sunshine.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

@fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.

Everything you read are better based on my own experipence and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

Don’t let anyone steal your dream!

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Dear life, thank you for the doubters. Thank you for the people that thought I can’t. Thank you for the people that want to discourage me to remain in a box they see is fit for me. Thank you for the people that think a way is ok for them, because they are the people that make me want to be something. They are the people that make me want to and not try to. People talk to me about what they want to do, and I rarely hear people talk about what they will do.

One thing I love to do in my life is to encourage other people. For many years I have considered what to do with my life, what business to be involved in. Yet, it’s always been staring me in the face. It’s not about a product, or bad circumstances. It’s about my state of mind, about what I am am determined to do. When you are determined to achieve something for sure you will achieve it. It got me thinking about the things I have been determined to get, the things that I have been determined to get but did not achieve. Negative? For sure not. It also hit me thinking about the things I wanted to do and which of those I achieved. Then the things I have been told in my life I can and can’t achieve.

Is life really about circumstances? Does disease really have any right what so ever to take away your dreams. Why have you not got the car you want, why are you not in the house you want to be in. The watch you want is still in the shop and you are making do with one that’s perfunctory. You want to be in a detached house yet you live in a semi. You hate your train journey to work, your job is not what you want. You feel depressed, your in a life that you feel your being treated unfairly or that you have been given a bad hand that life has not treated you right. Who on earth has the right to do that, why do you do that.

I love it personally when people tell me “you can’t” because I am very stubborn which makes me want to prove people wrong. It makes me want to say. “Really, well I don’t feel the same way” I weight trained 3 times a week for 2 1/2 years. NOTHING would stop me. Why was that though? When we bought our second house together, it HAD to be detached. When we bought our dog car it had to be a certain car, yet a few years previous I made do. Although maybe we allowed our circumstances to dictate to us what that car would be.

It’s time for change, but how what will that involve. A job? An online business? Well I have my ideas, I have the solution and so do you. It’s staring you in the face as well. That you and only you have the answer.

Raise your standards, because you will always get what you HAVE to have. Never in the world have people had what they want in their mind. YOU have the opportunity to achieve, there is no possibility here. There is a reality here, that you have right in front of you. Commitment to the end goal will bring an achievement. Doing something over and over and over and over again. What ever that is that your committed to you WILL achieve it. 7 years ago I became passionate about getting well. I did not just want to be well again though, I wanted to be cured. To rise up once again and to help others to believe that they can also have a better day tomorrow. Yet I believe that what matters the most is TODAY, not the next day. Get rid of the people in your life that hold you back. Show me a man that said I could not beat cancer, I will tell you now they are no longer in my life. Get rid of anything that holds you back, it does not matter what that is.

“Who has the right to stop you” nobody! Yet you stop you all the time because your standards are to low.

I want you to know today, that what you have failed at in the past does not make you a failure. What makes you a failure is not getting up again and perusing your passion. Perusing your dreams. Dreams are normally more than what you have, unobtainable. But I want to challenge you today to stand up and say “I am going to fulfil my dreams” see you are the problem, that your thinking, your mind what you choose to be. Will actually be.

Einstein said “imagination is more important than knowledge”

What do you want? To be influenced, or to be a person that influences others? That’s my question to you.

I have been frozen, I have been held back by others opinions. You have the power to be who ever you want to be, you have the power to bring into your life what ever it is that you want in your life. There are a lot of complainers, excuse makers. People that don’t mind settling for what they have, people that let things happen to them.

No ones journey is easy, but you do have the chance each day to ‘Become’ you have the choice to think what you think. Success is a journey that starts with what you choose to think about. You really think you can be the best if you don’t do anything about it. I want you to believe today, that this one sentence is true. “That anything is possible”

If you don’t try then where is your hope, hope is something that becomes faith. I started writing a book some time ago, I for sure have been plagued with stumbling blocks in my life, but no more than someone else has. What’s wrong with me is that I have listened to some negativity in my life. That my thoughts that I have chosen have led to some of my failings. We have all had bad things happen to us, but your thoughts, hope, belief, and getting back up that matters. True failure is not trying at all.

Don’t get in line because other people are, dare to make your own line. The one you dream of.. I guess this blog could be deemed ‘the law of attraction’ get rid of the people who hold you back and start your own line, be a line maker not a person that’s happy to que. my wife will read this after she has watched her Derby day. What’s funny about that is that she found herself queuing on 2 occasions today. Both times she chose to leave that que and come home to enjoy home instead.

You are what you think you are and my challenge to you is, that choose not to talk yourself out of your dreams like I have for 30 years. That you stand and act on your dreams. That you drop the negatives. You have learnt the fear of failure like I have. Well today I am am starting a new line, a line where I am going to stop listening to the negatives even if they come from myself.

You have a lot to offer the world, you also have a lot to give to yourself. Step out of the boxes the world puts you in, because your an amazing person with more to offer than you know. What people say about you, does NOT have to become your reality.

Do what you love, just do that. That’s your new line. You deserve to find your purpose! You don’t deserve to hear the play it safe speech. Because non of us will get out of this alive and that’s a fact, so we might aswell do what we love right? Keep stepping forwards, keep being positive. Keep practicing, keep believing in your dreams because they are there for a reason.

Write 5 reasons why you won’t give up! Make them your reasons to carry on.

Have a great week,

I look forwards to hearing you comments.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

@fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.

Everything you read are better based on my own experipence and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage yoou. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

Why ya gotta owe something, to get something.

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It’s how people see things that are not saved, they think that if someone gives to them that they must owe them something. Wow that sentence hit home for me, because I like to give yet I receive aswell. It’s a hard lesson for someone that’s a giver to receive graciously. For sure I have made many mistakes in my life, some catastofic. (Spelling I would like to say is catastrofic but I can’t spell it.)

No ones perfect! But yet a really valuable lesson is to learn that to be given to is as beautiful as the person receiving something from you. Yet we hope the person would receive the gift and accept you want nothing in return. I have learnt in life that people want to give to me and I take away that pleasure for them sometimes. I love the feeling I get when I give to someone and even a small thing can mean so much to someone.

There begins the line from another Rocky movie

Que Rocky Balboa accent!

“Friends don’t owe, friends do because they wanna do”

Those nurses saved my life, didn’t they? Or was it the whole thing, the transplant, my faith, my friends? Or was it not the giving of all the people that were in the whole process. I digress.

The point is that giving in its self is a gift, that humility in being given to and allowing that person the beauty of the feeling we all get when we give. I believe that it’s as important as giving itself. It’s for sure something I am learning and stepping forwards to get better at it. You know I still don’t think many people get why I blog and get nothing for it. I see people going to work and earning while I blog to encourage others yet for no reward. Every time I pick up this I pad I want to use it to help people. So am I actually one of the people that feel like I owe, because the treatment saved my life? Well the answer is possibly a bit, but that’s only because I want people who are going to face what i did, gain from my experience possibly. That’s why I give.

We are all blessed in our own way, maybe although I don’t reread what I have written out loud very well (so I am told) but I am able to a small degree at least. Help people to find the strength to carry on, to find a way when they feel there is no way. To articulate what’s happened in my life to encourage other people. You can’t do much when your isolated so I did what I could do with what I had in my hands.

My friends I must conclude by saying, if someone wants to give to you. Allow them to feel good about it, allow them yo enjoy their giving. But also if you want to give don’t be afraid of rejection, be happy you are able or in the position to give. Don’t take people for granted, recognise the good things about them. But most of all. You ain’t gotta owe someone, to give something to someone.

Positivity changes lives.

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I did a bit of a test yesterday, I was feeling low and I have to say depressed. I was sat at the table and almost felt there was no point to life. Yet, I have done things for people that have lifted their spirits yet mine were low, I was really down and was punishing myself for not being an,e to do things. That my wife is now the bread winner in our house because of cancer, I was low that my energy levels are still low, my pain is still high. All those things got a hold of me.

Then out of the blue my friend sent me a link, it was about hope and that if you let go of hope then what are you anchored to? Something else perhaps like fear, or helplessness. Self pity, anger. The bible teaches us that perfect love casts out all fear. That fear is a product of our own making. Then I started to realise that even if I didn’t have faith, I had named my dog Faith. Knowing that even if someone was looking after our baby that they to, while they had her would also have faith. I started to think about all the good things I had and the top two were Faith and hope. You can have no money, no possessions and yet still be blessed with Faith and hope.

So you all know I can’t have children or so I am told by the doctors, yet I always look around the house to child proof it for when we do have children. I have hope.

Faith is the substance of things hoped for. Heb 11-1

Now those of you that know me well, will know that when I beat cancer the first time that I bought a lab. We called her faith because I believed I would beat it, I hoped that it would be gone and I believed it would be gone. I want to go back to when I was 4 years old. My parents were poor and they could not afford a bike for me, they told me that if I hoped for a bike then I should pray for a bike and ask God for a bike. My hope for a bike was so much greater than my parents knew, that night I believed I would get a bike and told God I would like a red one please. Every night I prayed, and asked God for a red one. Then one day, someone told us about a bike my dad picked it up and I still remember seeing my red bike with solid tyres by the gorse bush in the back garden lent up against the outside toilet. You see to have faith you need hope.

I had hope I would beat cancer, which gave me faith. Which was the name of our dog. So effectively we always had faith, and we say her name everyday. Yet even with faith I still had to hear those words again. “You have cancer” yes that’s right a second time it came but this time things would be much worse. I would have to have a Bone marrow transplant.

I have to say my faith took a hit and I did become very low exhausted and felt ripped off somehow. Yet still in the back of my mind I had hope, hope that I would win. I started this blog and wrote as my first post.

“I am Mark a cancer fighter, and I will win”

I had hope, and after my treatment was finished I had a fertility test that told me I was infertile and would never have children. We would never get to call our daughter Lily over to us, never get to hold our baby and nurture him or her. If we had a boy he would be called Harry. So we chose a different path and faith had puppies and we kept one. We spent 7 weeks nurturing those pups, letting them go one after the other.

Barney,

Reggie,

Hope,

Bonnie,

Trevor,

They all had their own little personalities and for sure made friendships in the box. If you want to see more of the antics in the box we used #BigPuppyBox

We kept one of the puppies and the one we kept we named Hope, although my wife did change her name to Lily Hope we have Faith and hope in our home and believe it’s a special way to live.

What ever happens in your life, never let go of hope because things hoped for is the substance of faith. With faith in what we don’t understand we can rise above our circumstances.

So yesterday I wrote a positive post. I wrote that I had beaten cancer and that I was 2 1/2 years out of transplant and that if I could you could. I stayed anchored to hope but I chose to do that. We now have a 9 month old puppy called Lily Hope, now we always have hope. But you can have hope also, you just have to chose it over fear. Because does not have a positive ending where even in the darkness hope can bring light and help you have faith that you will win.

What ever you choose I hope, you choose faith. Because that’s where a new beginning starts. Here is a picture of Faith and Hope as I write.

My state of depression was lifted because I chose hope. What will you choose dear friends?

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

@fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.

Everything you read are better based on my own experipence and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

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I am not!

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Even that is a creation. You can choose the “I will be” creation but that’s your choice. It’s not about you being happy or God being happy with you.

It’s about the you you are, being positive about you. If the feelings not good, let it go! People say things like

“why me” but why not you?

“Life’s so hard” it is for everyone!

“I wish I could” you can, there is a way.

Life is as hard as we expect it to be, I mean I can talk right, suffering more than I should because of cancer? Or maybe cancer made me realise how alive I am. Pain is a reminder of that everyday. A reminder cancer could not win, or a reminder I am alive. Oh of course I get my bad days, but then you can’t go though life with just all good days, or all bad days. You can’t have one without the other.

When we live life this way, nothing can bring us down for long periods. Because there is always something to look forward to. Pain is a reminder we are still winning. Reasons to do rather than excuses not to.

Living a grateful life is for sure a better way to live. We can’t have one without the other. A battery can’t work without a negative, and for sure you can’t have a positive without it. So a life being grateful for the negatives is far more useful.

Another one drives a duster…

are you grateful for the negatives?

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

@fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.

Everything you read are better based on my own experipence and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

You are what you say you are.

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For me I believe in blessings and curses, I believe what you say is what you will be or become, and that your words can go even deeper than that. How many times have you said it “I am useless” “I can’t” well I am with you, although I expect more from myself these days.

Having been faced with losing my life, I know everyday I am also faced with life itself. That the gift of life is so very precious and knowing that, that it’s important to make each day count all the more. That’s why I make a conscious effort to speak life into people’s life’s including my own. Say you can’t, you will be right. Because the universe heard you say it. Say you can and you will be equally right. Positivity is possible every single day. If positivity is something you choose, then it’s something that will happen in your life. Choose to gain for yourself and not give to others you will live a pointless life with no meaning and for sure you will not feel the beauty of giving.

The words you say, will work themselves out in the universe. Take me for instance, I said I had cancer once, I was 15 I knew no better. But I did indeed get cancer. Twice. Maybe I got it because I said I did anyway, or maybe I just got cancer!

Choose to say nice things to people, even with no money what so ever you can change a persons life. You can make a person feel good, and perhaps even help them to have a positive outcome where they may have previously not thought it possible. You have the ability to speak life into people’s lives. YOU have an opportunity to not only bless others but to bless yourself and your family but what you choose to say and do.

A person I have known for some years, was told that they were nothing, a failure, and someone no one would want to be with. Unattractive and many other demeaning words. It’s so so sad that people feel they have to be that way towards others. Seemingly to make themselves feel better, but I can assure you the person that spoke those words will have harmed themselves and the feeling of (making themselves feel good) will not have lasted or even happened.

You have a choice every second as to what you do with your life. To love, to hate. To give it to take. What ever you choose remember there is a consequence. Some consequences are good, not all are bad. What will you choose? That’s the question?

Fonz

Bless someone I dare ya.

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

@fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.

Everything you read are better based on my own experipence and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

Stress is a killer. Some helpful tips on stress relief. 

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How are you doing today? Happy? I spoke to a guy today that has suffered with Depression all of his life, I won’t pretend to know what I am talking about or say I am an expert on the subject. Because for sure that’s not true, but what I can tell you how I have dealt with things. I know that when you shake a bottle of pop, then take the top off it goes absolutley everywhere. It’s the same with stress, I think personally that Anxiety and stress are in the same family and both CAN lead to a state of depression. Although I don’t understand fully the medical state of depression there are many thoughts I would like to talk about in this blog, and share my own experiences and talk about how I overcame stress. 


My first bit of advice to anyone that is suffering from stress is to make sure that non of what you feel belongs to someone else. For example the way someone parks outside your house. That someone has not finished something, the way people live their lives. Anything that’s not yours to worry about is NOTHING to do with you. 

The garbage truck Talks about that and how you have enough problems of your own without worrying about what others do, it just fills your back pack up with other people’s junk! What’s the point. 
The only way to over come stress in my mind is to Let it go. Look at it like this, that it’s a pop bottle with the top on it. That with the top on the pressure can build up, like us if we have no outlet at all! The stress builds up and can lead to serious illness. Where as a bottle with no top on can be poured out any time you like and no pressure builds up at all. 


Credits: Lukas Gojda/Shutterstock

So I have to go back to the man in the Dacia Duster again reversing into a space next to me and I was getting bothered about it. Why, just let it go, it is after all nothing to do with me what so ever.  Unless of course he had hit our car, then I would have had to react appropriately.

There are many tools available to us, mindfulness, mental health  is a real issue. (I know here I go again right) cancer changed my life and helped me see a new world. Although sometimes I let little things others do affect my day I do want to be a better person tomorrow than I am today. I learnt that if I have tension that I needed an out let. I don’t have the energy of a normal man, so excercise although important was and is not a method that keeps me stress free. So I had to achieve a number of things that did not involve expending energy. I thought maybe writing and having something to think about would help. So I started a blog and challenged myself to write everyday for a whole year. 365 blogs in 1 year. I did that and you are now reading the blog that I stated writing. 


To overcome stress, you need another focus, I have a car that I take out when I need a smile putting on my face. I will go out for a drive just to hear the exhaust note. 

When I was at my junior school I used to sit in front of a fish tank and watch the fish. Mr Glover thought this was a punishment to me, but I loved it so used to be naughty to get out of his boring lessons. The led to me having a pond where I watch my fish and allow my heart rate to be lowered, thus relieving me of stress. I believe stress leads to anxiety and depression, and is a serious problem that people need pressure releases to overcome it. Boxing, cycling, walking, swimming, a hobby like my fish are, boating, hill climbing, canoeing, shooting, classic cars, writing, art, gardening, being part of a group that challenges you. All these things release stress, I used to dance, (badly) but it released stress. Weight training helps to, as does anything that keeps coming into your mind like a job that needs doing in the house. Get it done and it’s not an issue anymore, that can cause stress to the  longer it goes on for. 

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One thing I realise is no one will help you if you don’t help yourself. But helping yourself makes you feel good as does helping others. You will need to find your own stress reliever, but having our dogs is a massive stress reliever as are cats. Our cat was put down a few weeks ago which was sad. But times a healer, our two dogs have given us a new perspective and always are with us. 

Laughter with friends is the same as the whistle on an old kettle, actually why don’t all Kettles whistle when they boil? But that whistle is what’s happening to your body when you laugh, you let off steam. Only yesterday I talked to a friend about how important it is to have something to look forwards to and something that will help you release pressure from your system. Even a stress ball can help,


Signs you are stressed

Stress can be revealed in many ways, here are a few. People that are stressed respond differently to people that are relaxed. They snap, take things personally. They clench their fists, they don’t hug their partner enough. Take it out on their partner rather than talking about it and hugging it out. Stressed people also don’t make their bed and have piles of things yo do in the house that have mounted up. I know because I have been, and have created all these problems myself. You will go to bed and still be arguing, you will drive to fast. For me there are lots of things that don’t cost money that can help with stress relief. Time with friends and a game of pool is really good for mental health aswell. Your not a failure if your stressed you have just gotten into a situation where you have taken to many things on. Don’t take on any more and get the jobs ticked off one at a time and don’t look at it all at once. If you look at the 101 jobs that need doing you will never do even just 1 job. So just do one at a time. Once one is done move onto the next ect ect.


Trust me ticking some boxes, and having a holiday to look forwards to. Will help your mind set. We got back from Scotland and booked another cottage for next year. 2 weeks away with our dogs, my mum n dad will come and my brother and sister in law with my nephew Zac. It will be fun and something ahead we will enjoy together.

Take care of each other, your important. More important than you know. Make sure you look each other in the eyes and hug. Hugging and loving others is a tremendous way to relive stress. Say sorry, even if it’s not your fault. I tell myself. You don’t have to be right, it takes effort to be stress free. But for sure a stress free life is far better than anxiety and depression. Releasing your stress will go a long way to helping yourself in other areas of your life.

Hugs to you all, wow and thanks for reading. Just think if just by sharing this you helped someone. Just a thought.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

 @fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are better based on my own experipence and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

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It’s easy to forget, what family means.

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You know where you have come from, you know what you had growing up. But while we are children (in my case anyway) I used to have wants and used to regard some things unfair. Not being able to have that mars bar, that ice cream, that bag of sweets. My focus was on eating and what I could get. Yet we did not realise the sacrifices that were made in your family to have what you did have. 


It’s easy to forget how hard it was to get to the position you are in, and your children may never realise what you sacrificed to be where you are today. In my case it was later on in life when I realised what family is actually all about. That the love I had within me was being used the wrong way. That it was far more satisfying to give something to someone that needs it rather than to get something because you want it. Then I had a eureka moment, that that’s what love meant, that the word often used by my brother instead of “I love you” is the word family. That family although possibly not translated this way in the dictionary. Actually means sacrifice for each other. Giving because you love someone not always because we want to, but most certainly because we love that person. 


Working till 3 am, overcoming pain, smiling because every smile is a gift and a lift for someone in their life. It’s easy to forget what battles someone has faced to get to the very point they find themselves at. That their journey has had bumps in the road to. That doing for someone means that you are a part of something, that family means that you belong and that the efforts you have made are because you are in a family. We are all different that’s for sure but the feeling of love we have is there because of all that has been done in the past. The feeling a parent feels is overwhelming, you hear it said “a child only a parent could love” 


When me and my brother were growing up, I wanted to do and feel things how I thought I should. All children think they know best and I carried this on right up until my 40’s only the lessons in cancer taught me “you learn more when you listen”. Since then I have asked my parents many things and I have learnt much about them. My dad surprised me one day when he said he had made mistakes and asked me for forgiveness. 

Things have started to get a new perspective, losing a pet, loving a dog. They become family, and while some may say “it’s just a dog” you know they have never had a dog simply by calling him/her IT. I very much do my best to live a life where I love my dogs. Yes we have two. Labradors, but no children.  My wife and my dogs are our family, and it’s so nice to be a part of.


The word family means, unconditional love. It means sacrifice, it means going the next mile when you think you can’t. What my family is like is personal to me as yours is to you. But I will never forget in a low point in my life, my dad saying to me. “The Lord will restore the years the locusts have eaten” I could never see it before. Because to see it, dying to self was the most important.  Yet my wife and I will spend some time together in a cottage in Wales with my parents and our dogs really soon. I really look forwards to that, and don’t dread it at all.

That my wants were not the most important, that indeed what my wife needs is the most important. What my dad needs and mom needs are the most important. But I guess we all grow out of that immaturity, or is it just that the mars bar became a car. 


What I do know is that family is love, that encapsulated in the word family are many things that only your own immediate family know. The small things we do for each other are really what count. Not to count what was not done. That’s just a waste of time. All families have failings, but there are also some very beautiful things to be found in family. We just have to choose not to labour in what didn’t happen rather be grateful for what does happen. Family is precious, many say bloods thicker than water. But we also choose to love people that are the family we choose. 

So just take a moment to appreciate all that family means to you, be thankful for what you have. Because one thing is for sure, today is a gift so don’t waste it remembering your mars you never had. Remember all that was sacrificed so you could be you. It’s a wonderful life.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

 @fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

W

Link

Delete button. Or is it the divorce button.

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Delete button. Or is it the divorce button.

All to easy to do that isn’t it. Press delete and it’s no longer there, the app or the frustrating game you waste so much time playing. But what’s frustrating me so much with this want it now society? Well it’s not the fact that people drive around in cars that they don’t own, or the fact that people want a burger and fries with immediate affect when they want it. Not so much that now isn’t soon enough. My concern is for the mental state of mankind. That it’s becoming so easy to get a 55inch TV without paying for it. That you can get a settee and pay nothing for 2 years or what ever. What bothers me is people don’t TALK anymore. That people have a difference of opinion and that’s the end of that. That friendships and relationships seem to be about what people can get rather than what they can give.


My parents married for 50 years!

That “what can I get” is more heard of than what can I give. You see that’s why relationships and friendships break down. Not because they are not loved by you, or that you are not loved. Infact you are either inconsiderate, or selfish. The world ends up with so much disharmony because people think they can just throw stuff away. Even people are thrown away, which is why device is on the rise. The older generation had it right, once you were married it was for life. Still is in my book. But not all of us have the very noble and healthy opinions. Because it’s all to easy to separate. Than to carry on working things out. 

People that have been married for long periods of time, have to work at it. They have to say sorry and not go to bed on an argument. Me and Andie my wife always start the day with a kiss and end it with a kiss. We always  have a kiss to look forwards to. We trust that we have each other no matter what. Loving someone takes effort it’s not something that’s easy.  I don’t understand these girls and boys that have children together and then split up. 


Listen I know life’s tough, but choose to give and not take away and life would be better for everyone. Putting your arm around someone is not difficult. But saying sorry means so much. Let’s make choices that give, as opposed to taking. To have the attitude, what can I give, is so much more attractive that what can I have. 

Possibly people’s mental health would be improved, and in turn lives children ect ect we all need security. Will you choose to give that? Or do you want what you can get? Choose what’s best for others not just you.

Have a great weekend

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

 @fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

The mountains of Scotland.

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I am sat here as a new by to Scotland really. Even though I have been to the highlands. It was in the dark and nothing like our experience of today. I am finding it hard to find words to do this country proud. But I must start by saying how truly emotional I have been today. That we were able to enjoy the majestic mountains of Glencoe, the highlands and the small of the island of Skye we have seen today. I had always thought NewZealand to be the most amazing country in the world until today.  I have just merely been introduced to Scotland today. Yet we have so many adventures to encounter. Could Scotland actually be the most beautiful country “IN THE WORLD”


As you round each corner you see more than one mountain that comes into view, as you look up at the splendour faced by these naturally formed mountains. (The photos don’t do them justice) You feel small, insignificant and after a week of thinking about the right word to discribe them. intimidated. Intimidated in a gasp kind of way where you have your heart in your mouth, in awe that the world has such splendour in it. That a 8 hour drive had all this to offer, yet only now at 49 had I followed in my grandads footsteps. At this moment I would like you write you a picture. You see my grandparents loved travelling these parts, even though they lived in Redhill Surrey, they used to drive up to the highlands above lochLoman.  

They would get in the car, a beige Honda; always with them were  two chairs that unfolded. A table, a scrabble board, one of those blue gas burners you could buy for camping with the L shaped prongs. Theyunfolded so you could place their kettle on the top. Of course a kettle. A metal tea pot and my Grandma always had an old square tin that has had shortbread from a previous trip with some home made cake in it. They had pillows in the car so they could sleep anywhere. 

When my grandparents wanted a cup of tea they would pull over, put the chairs out facing each other unfold the table (wooden) and put the scrabble board (deluxe) on it along with the China cup and saucer. The kettle would be placed on the gas burner complete with the whistle to tell you when it was boiling. The water was then added to the tea pot, this was done by straining the water through a tea strainer. No tea bags for them, then more leaves added to the pot and left to stew. The tea would then be poured through the strainer to catch the leaves to make a truly British cup of tea.  Grandma would always have a tartan rug over her legs and they would both always have a smile. Sat by the side of the very quite roads laughing with each other, eating cake and drinking a lovely cup of tea. I feel like we are following in their footsteps and have imagined them sat in a lay by many times whilst enjoying time with my wife and dogs on this amazing island of Skye. 


Scotland it’s just one amazing place and we are so so pleased to be celebrating our anniversary together. Scotland, you are a dramatic, intimidating place to visit. We have one more week here and look forwards to feeling inspired and intimidated in the coming days.

Little did I know that when more of our friends came to visit, we would actually be doing axe throwing in this land. The wifi was aweful in Scotland, so we spent a lot of time talking with each other, enjoying this wonderful planet through eyes that for sure have been cleaned through a new perspective I now have. The love of the planet is just so completely and utterly lovely, enlightening, emotional, and enchanting. No wonder my grandparents came up here so much. 

The waterfall you can see in the photo above was in our front garden, yet it could not be seen from the window. All I can say is we will most definetley explore Scotland more, what a wonderful country Scotland is. 

Everyday we would leave the cottage, and drive slowly being careful not to hit a sheep. Everyday the same thing happened, we would scream with delight as we saw the bird of prey. Which of course made him/her fly off, leaving us with phones in hand still trying to get the camera on. Your phone all of a sudden becomes like a jumping bean. When just moments earlier it was all calm and peaceful somewhere on the dashboard. Every single day the same thing would happen till we eventually got some absolutley appalling pictures that were blurred and really disappointing to look at. Even seeing the birds massive wing span will never ever leave my mind, but that’s no good for you, is it. I am sorry we failed at our endeavours despite being perched ever so close one morning. Our shots were just laughable. 

I like to think our dogs saw the magnificence of those wonderful birds. We saw a white tipped sea eagle and what we thought was a golden eagle to. A Kestrel, and I think that was awesome. If your Scottish, your country is amazing. May I say sorry to you all for not coming sooner. It’s like a world I had never seen before. Thank you Scotland we will be back again.

Fonz

Marketing 101 – notes from the scary anthology, part 6: “Sharing Is Caring”

Really like this guy, give him a like guys, like he says the way to success is to like and promote what others do. Nit wait for people to read what you have written. They won’t find you by accident, but they might if you interact. Great post.

Dan Alatorre - AUTHOR

danI said I’d share a few marketing secrets with you as we created and released and sold and marketed – continue to market – our scary anthology. This is the next installment.

Part of networking

and helping others in a quick and easy way that ALSO helps you,

is to Like and share their posts when they talk about the book.

For example,

  1. Maribel shared a blog post and put it on Facebook.
  2. I then liked it and shared it on my Facebook page. I’d share it on my author page and maybe here, too.
  3. Then each of you can do that, all liking and sharing HER post. That gets more eyeballs on the story YOU wrote.

THEN

You go to the link in her blog post and Like it and maybe tweet the link. Maybe post it on StumbleUpon or Pinterest, but DEFINITELY make a comment of some sort.

View original post 177 more words

Your future, not your pain.

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Your future, not your pain.

WOOH! 

The reality of  the past 7 years and the realisation that what I was interested in doing. (Encouraging someone everyday) has been achieved. Nuts really how this has happened considering the pain that envelopes me on a daily basis. Success is doing what you say your going to do. Asking if I want a coffee in a morning if you know me is pointless. Making a coffee for me if you so wished, I don’t take milk and less than one teaspoon of sugar. The point of this post is to talk with you about doing, not considering it. Talking to me seems useless, but standing up and doing something means so much to me these days.  

You see when your faced with losing your own life, no really you do start to see. It’s only then that you become. Let me explain. Good people, give. They don’t say, hey can I, do you mind if I, please let me. Good people do, they don’t speak of what’s happened. They just do, possibly because they have learnt the same lessons as me. This next picture I took of one of my friends and it speaks so much of what’s going on in this world. That to enjoy what you can’t control, is so much more of a peaceful way to live. Yet, I so often allowed things outside of my control to affect me. I know as another friend reminded me yesterday that we are of course ALWAYS a work in progress. If we are only willing to allow ourselves to not be controlled by our surroundings. Rather to accept what others choose, and enjoy what they choose even if it’s not what we would have done. 

This picture although not me, says all I want to say to you really. That to let what’s around you be, and be comfortable with others choices. That no matter what is or has happened around you standing and doing what you feel is right is actually right for you. No other way is right. To stop talking and start doing is when you discover life in its true fullness.

I know I have spoken of sentences the bible says at times in my blog. But this is what I mean.

Jesus Predicts His Death

John 12 vs…23But Jesus replied, “The hour has come for the Son of Man to be glorified. 24Truly, truly, I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a seed; but if it dies, it bears much fruit. 25Whoever loves his life will lose it, but whoever hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.…

In other words, if you continue to hate the world you live in and live a life of turmoil it will always be that. But let go of those things and allow the world to be around you and not try to change them. I most certainly will continue to become a better person. To stop allowing things others do to not bother me as appossed to annoy me. That the journey of others is theirs nit mine. Whilst on holiday, a Dacia Duster driver was reversing. Seemingly directly into the car I was driving. 

 

My accepting the world photo.

Why can’t you just laugh knowing your a better driver than that, Sentance. Changed my perspective and as ever. If your not with a friend that loves you enough to not let you stay the way you are. Then the chances are your with people that are around you because they want something from you. People that love you will always challenge you. But then of course they will always accept you to. But love you to much to let you stay that way. 

That’s what the verse means, until you stop worrying about your souroundings. You will never enjoy what your surroundings are.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

 @fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

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Faiths puppy journey.

Everyone loves a puppy.

fonzandcancer blogging to encourage.

Faiths Puppy journey.

What does every body think 5 weeks and 1 day in? Although she’s not really showing to me, she’s definitely put on weight. She will be wormed in 2 weeks. From 7 weeks onwards the magic will start to happen. We already have 5 potential homes without to much effort. We are without doubt looking for caring loving homes for these puppies. We are looking for people to accept their puppies on their journey called life.


One sentence that rings true with me is.
A dog is there for part of your life, but you are their whole life.

Here are some pictures of her in her life with us.

Faith loves a ride out in the TVR.

She didn’t eat the chocolate. Dogs get sick from chocolate.

Looking majestic on our lawn.

Faith captain of the boat.

Faith in my brothers amazing garden


Our dog is…

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A smile can change a life.

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I always thought I would sink so I never swam.

Throughout our lives we are faced with opportunities. Some I chose not to choose and some I am so grateful I did choose. Like friendships, to go this way or that. Have you ever stopped to think; what would I have happened if I had chosen a different path. Where life would have taken us should we have chosen to befriend someone or not.

I remember once walking down a street and our eyes met we smiled at each other and carried on walking. Perhaps had I stopped I would not have the people in my life I do today. But is not about what we didn’t do is it. It’s about what we did do that chances our path. Or is it the not doing that takes us on a new path to the things we choose to do.

For me I am happy I never stopped that day, although it’s still something in my mind. Because without me choosing not to I did not sink. Or maybe that smile was just something we shared that made both of our lives better.

I adore smiling at people I think need some kindness. 3 days ago I smiled at a married lady with little hair. “You on chemotherapy” I said. She lit up and gave me a hug. It was like we understood and empathised with each other. It’s amazing how we can affect someone’s life just by understanding someone.

Only you can have that affect on someone. Only you can bring light into someone’s life. Never say you are not able to do anything, because even a smile can have a positive affect on others lives. You have the smile and ability to do that. Try it make someone’s day, choose to smile today. Let me know how that went in the comments.

Let’s affect the world with kindness.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

@fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience)

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others.

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

Nothing is the most important part of life.

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So what are your thoughts on ‘nothing’? Useless? That nothing has no use what so ever? The most important thing about you, is not what you have, but what is nothing about what you have. You are not really you are you? Your just a body, when that body dies there is no you because there is no space for you to be in. Driving a car does not make me become a car, and who I think I am is not what others perceive of what I am. The bible says ” so if a grain of wheat falls to the ground, so shall it then bear fruit ” that you have to realise it’s not actually about what you are that makes you you. But what you are not that makes you you. 

Is a house useful? I say no, it’s the space inside that’s useful. How can a house have a use if it’s not an empty space. Ok so we put things in it, but it’s the empty space that makes us able to put things in it. You are NOT your body, your so much more than that. 

People say to me, “isn’t it amazing how life gives us so much yet takes it away” life happens all around us and we can’t stop it. Yet what we can do is decide what we fill ourselves with. 


I believe I had cancer once to teach me that, but I did not listen. So I had cancer again to help me see it’s not the person that’s successful but the things they allow to come into their lives. A man that learns has to listen and allow change to happen. No one can be anything of use if we think that who we are is greater than anyone else. That’s called pride and that always comes before a fall. Or so we are taught. Life happens to us, because we are empty and allow life to happen to us. When you build something come bricks you are building NOTHING for life to happen. 

You can only be of use to anyone including GOD if we are empty of ourselves, and who we think we are. 

I absolutley love hearing people’s stories about the things they own. Only yesterday me my dad and my mum were clearing some of the garage out. An empty space that had things in it. I saw a box, a really really old box. I picked it up and asked my mum to tell me about it. As I opened it, it revealed nothing inside yet a torrent of memories were realeased from my mums memory. Non of the story could have been told were it not for that empty box. It’s nothing that matters the most, because what’s the point in being full of everyone else’s rubbish if there is no room in us for something that matters. Being full of nothing means there is room for something that matters.

Have a great day

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

 @fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

Be who you are, who cares what others think?

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The most important thing is what you think about you, what others think is not actually your problem unless you make it your problem. From this moment onwards, my caring about what people think stops here. Impressive is being happy in your own skin, not wanting others to recognise that your ok or that your a good person. Actually why would you care what anyone thinks of you, as long as your ok with you. You will have made mistakes in life, and thats ok. Don’t give yourself a hard time for the mistakes you have made, move on and surround yourself with people that like themselves. Choose your friends wisely and make sure your around people that want to build you up, not drag you down. People that are content not to be something, will not help you grow. Growth starts with you, and the acceptance that your a good person. 

Be who you are, not what the world thinks you are. Because you know what, people will want you to trip up. I still don’t know what I want to do in business but I do know this. That I want to encourage people in their journeys. I want to lead people to success, even if that’s believing that they can beat cancer like I did. Believing you can starts with you and not what others think of you. What you are not, is a wasted sentence. What you did wrong is a wasted thought. 

Be positive in your daily walk, and make sure everyday you do something that builds yourself up. You won’t find multi millionaires in a night club being sick down a toilet. They will be in a nice restaunt eating good food with a hood wine or even an ice water. 

Be who you want to be not what others expect you to be. Because what others think is not your problem.

Have a great day

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

 @fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living. 

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Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living. 

Your having a bad day? You can’t take anymore? Your bills are to high? You keep saying you can’t. Every single day of my life I am faced with the effects of treatment. Yet every single day I do the best that I can. Or do I? Or do I just do the best that I am told I can, and should expect to be. In school we are taught, but we are not taught any differently today than 150 years ago. Yet the world around us has changed so much. A computer 150 years ago was a simple abacus, yet you will be reading this on some kind of reading device. People with no money go to rubbish dumps to collect plastic bottles so they can eat. Yet you hold a phone, a kindle, and I pad? You have a roof over your head and possibly even sky or a cable network and a flat screen TV. Your ok, you have food in your belly maybe even you may have some money down the back of your settee. 

It’s such a shame for the fish, that it can’t climb trees. Such a shame for the Bee that can’t make it rain. We focus so much on what can’t be that we forget what can be. That only you are restricting you from any kind of success even if that’s just getting out of bed today. I am so very exhausted right now we have had illness in the house and it’s been hard work looking after myself aswell as my wife as I write this I am up and down to the toilet with a tummy bug. I feel like absolute rubbish. 

But let’s go back to the fish that can’t climb a tree, it can swim, it can reproduce it can do things we can’t. Like spend its whole life under water. We can’t do that. The Bee, that makes honey that transformes us and even fights infection. I must have some honey now I mention it. Bees give us so much that we all take for granted. Even now a symbol of together for the atrocity in Manchester. 


Shakira grew up in a rich family that lost everything and knows what it’s like to have nothing. All her house was cleaned out and at 8 years old she had not even a chair to sit on. Yet she used what she did have. (Her voice) her peers told her that her voice was bad, she was also rejected and produced 3 albulms before she was recognised. She vowed to do something for the poor and now runs a charity that blesses people. All because she used what she did have and did not focus on what the world would have her believe. JK Rowling had nothing when she draughted one of the worlds best selling books of all time. 

You will get kicked down, that’s a fact. We all have a fight that’s also a fact. We all can look at the good in something or the bad. But living is in the getting up, and finding something good to say about someone. This post did not exsist 20 minutes ago, now it does forever. I don’t know if you needed to hear this today. But if you were encouraged today, let me know it’s great to get positive feed back. Focus on what you can do not what you can’t. After all can’t is a made up word anyway.

Fonz

 
http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

 @fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

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Sometimes you love a person, for all the reasons their not like you.

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Sometimes you love a person, for all the reasons their not like you.

I might say some pretty random stuff in this post. I make no apology. It’s time to have a little fun, maybe be a little crazy and most of all smile. So here we go, here is a little story inspired by a sentence on ‘Brigette jones baby’ .

I wonder if it was just me that spent a long time looking for someone I loved the look of, that loved what I loved, that wanted what I wanted.  Spending thousands dating, then at the end of a night that you spent all week buying clothes for, that lasted 5 hours. You find yourself on your way home in a taxi hoping you would be sick in the toilet and not all over the cab windows. Then hoping shortly afterwards that you would not get the cleaning bill for the taxi but then ya did. Only to find you had no money and you had to go inside your own home to look for money stinking of sick. Along with kebab sauce dribbled on your shirt. I can assure you this look is also accompanied by a bad hair day to. No not you? Oh well that would be just me then.


That the one you were to love, was interested in what you were, not what you had. Yet one of the first questions was always “Do you like motorbikes”  not all girls do you know, in fact I would say MOST don’t. I found out quite early on in life that just because a lady (girl) said they liked Martini. That alcohol should be savoured. That not all men would like Martini, including me, especially as I drank a full bottle in approx 40 mins. It was actually the second bottle of alcohol I drank that fast. The first being one of ‘thee olde English ciider’  just before a party at 13 I think (sorry mum) both occasions resulted in huge amounts of sick. Thinking back I wonder why I ever drank again. Just to clarify I don’t think that any more I am just not blind drunk every weekend… quite possibly making myself look bad but there is some humour among the the honesty, I think.. I mean. Oh never mind.

I am one of the fortunate people on earth, that I found out what is meant by the word love. That just because you like to eat fish it does not mean that’s right for the fish. In fact it’s not fair on the fish at all, it’s selfish love. If you loved fish, would you not look after them and feed them? Love for yourself, that’s why so many get divorced, because they love the fish and don’t look at the person eating the food we don’t like. 

Ok let me be clearer, we all love ourselves. A short video I watched recently reminded me of that.  You giving  love to someone does not mean you love them. It’s the other way round. You love those who you give to. You see when you give to someone you count the cost. If you give because you love to give, you never count the cost. It’s just given, because you will always love those you give to. Because you love you right.

Only understanding these principles can we understand who cares about us and who does not. The love of my life, who just so happens to be my wife likes all the films I don’t. The tv shows it all. Yet we give ourselves to each other making ourselves vulnerable often. Yet in doing that we don’t feel vulnerable because we both know, there is some of us invested in the other. True love enjoys vunrability. People that look for a fake skin deep love will never have anything invested so it will always be weak and fail at some point. Possibly leading to divorce.


Oh how I wish I could upload what I have learnt and take the chip out and put it in a younger persons head. But it’s not like that is it. I can tell someone that, it’s really bad to walk backwards on a pavement and turn around. Because at some point you will turn round and be faced with a lamppost. We have to learn it all for ourselves. Even the books we read will still mean we will eventually find out for real in the life we have.

When you give to someone and don’t want anything back, that’s true love. You can love working because you get paid. But giving to someone because you want to is the most precious of gifts. So true love is because you love  giving to that person, not what that person can give to you. 

Love is not easy, but then if it was we would all know how wonderful it truly is to love

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

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Your a failure

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Your a failure

But is not failure a good thing? There are many ways in which failure can be a good thing, a potatoe when boiled fails to stay hard. An egg when boiled becomes hard turning it into a hard boiled egg and coffee beans become coffee that we drink instead of a bean. Failure is only a bad thing if we don’t learn from it, find the good in the situation that we are in. My ethos in life is. “It’s better to do something, than to do nothing.” Many things in our lives  feel like they are there to hinder us and not help us. Yet for sure if we looked a little closer we could see something different.

People tell me they are depressed, people say that life’s tough and that it’s impossible to move on. That no matter how hard they try it’s not possible or that life has made them weak. Sometimes becoming weak is exactly when we can thrive and become what we are supposed to be. The potatoe is useless to us if we are hungry, if it’s not boiled. The potatoe has to go through a process to become useful. 


I want you to know something today, I want YOU to know that what ever you have faced does not make you less useful. I want you to know that actually what you have faced has not made you a failure but it’s brought you to where you are today. Failure is not failure unless you don’t learn from it. You will only talk about someone’s failures when they are a success, because how will anyone become anything unless we have known failure. 

You still have the same value as before life supposedly made you depressed or you got cancer. Believe me if you screw up a £20note and throw it in the bin, it still retains the same value as it did before. What people say about you, what people do to you does not change the value of who you are. Last week I was told a man could not use the internet because he had only a phone. That it was to expensive for him to have a good phone. Yet I asked Facebook and someone donated a phone and a tablet to the 88 year old man. You will only achieve what ever it is that you restrict yourself to achieving. But this blog post is written to tell you, that it does not matter what people have done to tread on you or run you down. Your value is the same as it was before. What ever your situation.


I got cancer and had to look after myself, give up smoking and make some adjustments in my life to remain cancer free. I lived with cancer and did not push it away, I learned that cancer was a part of my life therefore it never took a hold of me and took me down. A friend said to me once, you act like you are successful. “I am” I said “I beat cancer” the world wants you to be in specific boxes to be or not to be. But I want you to know, you have value and you always did and always will. You will never ever know what the dots will be to join up in the future. You will only know what they were when you look back. Only then can you see why certain situations were what they were. Because without them you would not be who you are today.

I am divorced, but I am also married to the most wonderful lady in the world, who I would never of married if I had net gotten divorced. If life happens our way how we perceive it to happen, we will never achieve what’s possible. Because we only think of what we believe to be possible in the box we had made for us by life. 

My best friend on this planet has a thriving business, it thrives because he said yes to carrying on a lot. His vision was to make a little bit of extra money. Now a great deal of people benefit from his business, but that also involved a lot of other people to say yes also. To believe that they had value also. You are so much more than a job title, or the words written on your CV your actually part of someone’s future. A part they are not able to achieve without you in it. 

Look at what you are, not what you where and remember that the value someone else thinks you have is nothing to the value you actually have. The bad you maybe experiencing will lead to something good in the end. Believe me.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

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Thank you cancer

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Thank you cancer.
Why not? I mean cancer has for sure helped me to see a world in a different way. I hope I can explain it well enough for you, that maybe you can see the world differently to just by reading this blog.  
In my world only my loving wife and my mom and dad truly know what life’s like for me. I am fortunate to be a prayed for man, which humbles me greatly that people take the time to pray. As I wrote that I phoned one of my dads friends who is in a nursing home who prays for me to thank him. People are so nice aren’t they. So on with this post.
If you suffer with pain or know someone that does or side effects from treatment this is for them, I just hope you can share it with them if you think it will help.
You see when you have pain, a useless one like nerve damage. It’s not something that can be changed, it most certainly will not go away by complaining about it or worrying about it. However there are things we can do, things that make life less painful even though the pain still exsists. I get told many times how wonderfully I have done, and can only thank God for the strength I have been given to carry on and the friends he has put my way. There are many things and words that can help us in life you know, just by putting a positive word into Google, or on my blog you will find something that will take your mind away from the pain you feel. So let’s take a word any word, an ordinary one and let’s see if we can help ourselves with one word.
BEE

So firstly from my own mind, what does the word Bee mean to me, well until just recently it could be an insect that stings and then dies needlessly. Pointlessly you may think. That could be the end, could it not? Or we could look at what a bee has it’s sting for that it protects its colony from predictors, that it makes Honey that’s used in so many different ways. In fact we find that some bees have heeling properties in their Honesy such as Manuka from New Zealand. We can take a photo of it and look at how amazing it is how it collects pollen, and by doing so pollinates other plants and even helps them to produce fruit. In fact without the bee, there would be no fruit at all on some trees. We can see the beauty that there is in what the bee does and how it looks all the time whilst doing this one thing, the pain we have feels less. Because we have looked at something in a different way. We have given ourselves a new perspective at that moment therefore helping our mental health and feeling less of the bad things for a short while.
Of course the Bee symbolises so much more now, being a symbol of anti terrorism for Manchester and a sign that we stand together against it.
Our two Labradors are amazing, they change how I feel and for sure help me with my own pain levels to. When I concentrate on them rather than the pain, it’s like I have gone through a period where I forgot I was in pain. Speaking of positive things, and doing positive actions make a differance in life, not only for the person that suffers but for the person that supports a person that suffers.
How you perceive something changes your whole life.
Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com
Our support group on our FB
Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 
It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. I
Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone
 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?
Copyright ©2017

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I know what it’s like to eat salty bacon with tears.

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I know what it’s like to eat salty bacon with tears.

I don’t know how many of you have just watched “Growing up with cancer” but I just did. Children that had the cancer i did, children that had to grow up with cancer and face things no child should. Well it took me back once again to that room where I had my stem cell transplant.  Kids are so resilient aren’t they, accepting of their situation and able to rationalise things and adapt. They seem to be able to deal with things quickly and efficiently. 

There was a young lad in the wards that became depressed and lost his appetite. He was unable to eat due to how he felt, he was angry and upset although he was uncertain of why he was so unhappy. Being depressed he was certain of. I know I was low and forced my family away from me, which is actually why I am writing this very post.  The family that wanted to be close to me I pushed away.  I did not allow them on the ward even though they could have really. I was so hung up on the word. Isolation. 

I wanted to give myself the best chance at beating cancer and living longer by not being around any germs what so ever. Well I want to put that right right now. Today should my wife’s dad be alive he would be 74. But cancer took him aged 59. I never knew him. But it’s made me realise I was wrong to be that way, that I should apologise to my family and say Sorry. Sorry for keeping you at arms length, and ask that you all forgive me.

Whilst in that room the chemo they give you, is so horrendous that you get hundreds of ulcers all the way through your body. They tell you that you are unable to eat, and that you would be better to have a nose tube to be fed through, and that exercise would be impossible. 

What I did in there I did for my family, I did what I thought I could to come through. I did press ups on the visiting chair that my wife used sometimes. I walked from the bed to the ensuite which was about 5 steps and back whilst having chemo moving all of the time and eating my breakfast not once but twice everyday. Sounds greedy right? Wrong. I would say eating bacon with ulcers in your mouth throat, intestines, all the way through to your bowl is not easy. You cry whilst eating making the bacon taste saltier. But every bite hurts like hell as it goes through your body making you not want to eat. Without doubt the easiest thing to do is to not eat, to choose nothing off the menu to sleep all day and not excercise. To give up. 

All I did in there I did for my family, and want to say sorry for not doing the things you wanted me to. It was wrong of me. 

To anyone that’s facing cancer or supporting anyone with cancer. What seems normal in life without cancer is most certainly not normal in a life during cancer. 

But I leave you with this, to do something is better than doing nothing, even if at the time it may seem like the wrong thing to do, it’s still better to do.
Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. I

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

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Family

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Family

Family does not have to be a place, it’s not something you get. Family is something you give, for many years I have missed the point till right now. No one owes me anything, no family member owes me. People that truly love don’t do it because they are a part of a family. They do it because they want to give NOT receive.. I personally know what it’s like to love someone, loving someone means you never remember what they owe you because they owe you nothing. If you think a friend owes you, then they are no friend. If you scroll through your phone and a person has not called you, that’s when you have to question if the traffic is one way.

I have this saying, that. If someone really wants to see you they will. It’s not your fault someone does not include you it’s their choice. One thing I have learnt of late is this one thing.

I have just bred a litter of pups, and at 16 weeks old our pup has just spent a week with her sister. They both have different personalities and the only time they truly love each other’s company is when they accept each other, warts n all.

 

Having dogs has also helped me to realise what true love is, and it most certainly is not what the dog can get from the other. It’s only when a dog accepts how another dog is and does not count the cost tat the love really starts..

we could learn a lot from dogs, but if nothing else what we should learn is. If someone has their hand out, the person they love is themselves. If the have their hand out yo help you up, their friendship is not just an action it’s a feeling. People love to receive or they give because they wanna give. What you have in your hand is nothing to what is given from your heart. Jesus paid the ultimate price to show us what love meant. Unserstand that, and you will have life.

 

enjoy your life with your hand out to help someone up, rather that a hand out to receive is when you will feel the true freedom of life.

Fonz

 

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To give Life

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To give life!!
At the moment we are looking after 3 dogs, although the other 2 are faiths pups you still follow them around guiding them to be good. The warmth they give my heart far out weighs the mist chief I find them making. Take this afternoon.

I am making a bigger pond for my fish of which I have 12 remaining. But that’s due to me not putting a net over the pond and a heron pinching one last night. So I am indoors sorting out cloud print or something on our Epsom printer… (Still no idea) the pups were outside. 


I am not silly, I know they make mischief but hoped they would be good. They normally play in the side garden, ripping up paper and snapping things. Anything is fair game. Take the other day I planted some climbers, only to find the plants half eaten on the grass. I said nothing and ent and got some chicken wire ( the plastic kind) and screwed it either side of the posts so no further intrusions of plants avoiding all dog chrime!!


The next day I came into the garden where I was confident I had sorted the issue to find the same plant uprooted and more besides and the netting ripped off. I looked at Lily Hope our puppy who tilted her head to the side in a (waaaaat) kinda way. Looking to cute to chastise. With a smile on my face… “NAUGHTY PUPPY”. I said. She looked at me satisfied with her dog chrime with a look of one upmanship as she waddled off.  No more has happened since. However. 

We return to the pond build and I had successfully moved all remaining 12 fish into a paddling pool ready for putting into their new home. Tomorrow. Whilst confusing myself with printer clouds and google chrome it appeared the two amigos ( sisters ) have been naughty and removed one of my fish and had decided to play with it on the decking. When I arrived they quickly left the area waddling satisfactorily down the path whilst I decided if I should bin the fish or do my best to revive the poor girl. 


Of course I opted to revive the fish, to my astonishment it now lives. My puppy and our friends puppy no doubt will still be partners in dog chrime, and I will continue to love them, and hope they find me some sort of  leader in the future. But I do rather think it best to enjoy that they are with us, and see their little lives as pleasant unpredictable additions to our family. 

Life is that, and no matter what your pain you can look upon the trials you face however you like. But you do have life which is a gracious gift.
Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. I

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

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Love NOT hate!

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Love NOT hate

Plucky Brits, a few people with an idealism are not going to change us. Your messing with the wrong people if you think we are going to roll over and let you sley us with your cowardly actions. We will always stand with each other when it comes down to it. When we need each other we are there for each other. 

Tonight I am watching truly brave people, not just the people that are standing with Manchester but the people that have gone to that concert. Showing unity, solidarity, love, compassion, and a kindred spirit. People joining together to say “WE” to say “Together” to say “we are one” people that were at the concert, people who have been affected by hate. personally I feel a sense of pride and passion for my fellow Brit. You live in a special place, your connected to special people. You see our flag is not a few colours thrown together it’s ‘GREAT BRITAIN’ you take from us. We will be there for each other and I personally think that’s amazing. 


You see in my mind is far more powerful to love your fellow man than to hate him or her. To give is better than to take. I have written in my posts in the last 2 years often about paying it forwards and loving each other. Even as I faced the worst days of my life I always felt to love our fellow man was better than the opposite.

Ariana. Grande has stood tonight after a horrific tragedy created through hate and 50,000 people responded by going to a concert organised at the last moment as a sígn that we are not alone.


Saffie Rose Roussos is with us no longer sadly taken but for sure her name will be said many times in years to come. That young girl lived in our village, but we stand together with love for each other. NOT hate. Hate is born of the devil and we are born of one far stronger. The Bible means ‘Basic Instruction Before Leaving Earth’  it teaches us that GOD is Love. Then surely to love another is done because you have life. 

So I say and give you this, do something in love is the very best gift of all. Love always wins over all.

Fonz

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The love of coco the family dog.

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The love of coco the family dog.

We all dread the day when our dogs will leave us and I guess we all hope it’s a painless parting. So I want today to write about coco my brothers chocolate Labrador.

Never did I meet coco and not feel love, we had a friendship as did everyone she knew. Coco was amenable and would adapt to any situation. It seemed her duty on the planet was to warm hearts and take away pain through love and hugs.

When you saw her you would get out of your car as quickly as possible. Knowing her exuberance would end with a number 11 down your car door. 

Me personally I was always a bit rough as we played together, but I like to think she enjoyed it. 

You could never leave food around where coco was, or anything edible for that matter. She was quite partial to after eights, I was to find out after leaving them on the floor from the night before. My fault entirely – cakes – even birthday cakes, I believe a chunk of an 80th birthday cake was missing, when it came to the cutting!

Coco was known to eat cakes and 12 paper cup cake cases were found one day in amongst her doings.  

Some dogs especially labs are food orisntated. We all loved coco in this house, and could never imagine cancer would take coco.  

Our dog Faith adored coco and if we said her name in the house she would look for her eager to find her. She always got excited 2 or more miles away knowing they would play together. I am fairly sure coco thought she was male at times. 


Coco was playful and was always up for a laugh.


Coco was a faithful companion to her family and without doubt filled their house with joy and made a house a home.


I personally will miss arriving at my brothers to be greeted by Coco. Possible not the defacating around our pool table however. All the same, coco will be missed by many. So glad you got to meet Lily Coco. We will miss you and will always have a place in our hearts. Thank you for all the love you brought to us all. Love always Mark, Andie, Faith, Lily and Jenson.

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We will miss you Coco.

R.I.P.
XxxxX

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What we think in our mind is what we will be.

How we use our mind is without doubt how we fail or how we achieve.

fonzandcancer blogging to encourage.

In our minds eye we have a picture of what will be, what we can achieve. Where we think our abilities will take us, what we think we are capable in our lives. Who we can and can’t be in this world, we have an idea that restricts us instead of encouraging us.
So by having the thoughts you have as to what you can achieve do you understand that that is the very thing that restricts you from becoming more. I have this approach in life ‘if he can, I can’ I used to be passionate about maybe being wealthy, you know the posh house, nice car holiday home ect.


Life is not like that anymore, I have changed. My life has changed, I now realise the one thing that makes us happy, and it’s not money or things. It’s contentment, it’s peace, it’s the planet, the creation God…

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Transplant 2 years in.

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Transplant 2 years in.

It’s incredible how things have changed from this day 2 years ago to today. 2 years ago today right now I would be having my first chemo in isolation having had my Hickman line fitted in the morning. I remember who was there for me, my friend Karl who was so amazingly supportive during my stay in hospital doing jobs for me back at our house. My wife is so impeccable at the detail wrote everything down from day to day during my transplant. Whist I don’t like to look back on negative things I just move on normally. But it’s reasonable to say it’s important to look back, so others who face the same can learn from my experience possibly. Your brain is a powerful instrument and I think shuts off from us the trauma we experience at certain times in our lives. That’s why my wife’s write ups are invaluable when looking back at my transplant journey.  For sure I don’t mind telling you I proberbly cried more in the first 24 hours in isolation than possibly any other 24 in the whole of my life before. 

There are two things you never need to chase in life. They are true friendships and true love. Both of which ironically we have no control over.  People that truly love you will be there for you as they were there for me. People that don’t really care about you will not be in touch with you at all. 

My Hickman line was playing up, although I don’t remember much about it. I made friends in that hospital that sadly I am not able to peruse due to hospital protocol. Dr Salem, Heather and Kim. The girls were like my Angels, there for me when ever I needed it. I am not able to get across to you just how amazing the people that work for the NHS are. They are committed and conscientious and vital to the health of us all in the UK. You will never realise how important the NHS is until you need it. There are some that disagree with me, but you have to remember that they do the best with what they have. 

If I have any advice for anyone who has this to face, don’t try and make your friendships happen. They will take care of themselves, the ones that are really important will make it through to the end. Aside of my family my wife Andie, Paul Benson, Johnny Wilson, Karl Boardman, and Simon Naylor were the people that kept me motivated. Phone calls not talking about cancer were a great relief in that small room.  Our cancer stories group which was small back the, had so many faithful people in it that were a great support. To name a few, Rob Fiscbeck, Liz Peters, Eileen Almond, our late friend Eileen Salmon, Judith Taylor, jean Anderson and Deanna Perich, were all good people and many many more that helped along with the whole Cancer stories group. My dad rang me everyday, if your reading this and your supporting someone in cancer. NOT talking about cancer is the best conversation you can have. 

You find out what’s truly important in times like these, aside of friendships. Peace with yourself, God and the planet is vital. What was can not be changed. But the future is in your hands and for sure you can make a differance in this world if you want to.

I guess what I am trying to say is, treasure what you have and enjoy what you have to the fullest. One day medicine won’t be my saviour, but I have and do know true freindship and true love in my life. I leave you today with a song Johnny Wilson gave to me when I went in for my transplant. The 3 weeks that changed me and my outlook forever. I only hope that someone reads this today and listens to this song and it helps you to realise the good you have in your life.

Be good to one another.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. I

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

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Mr Nasty.

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MR NASTY.

It’s been a while, whist finishing all my projects someone I met who called round a couple of times. Said “finish one thing before you start another.” As I looked around I realised how much there actually was unfinished at our house. But is that the right way to look at stuff. I mean there is so so much we have done in our home to. Let’s start a list. 

Let’s call it inside out. 

Tiled the whole of downstairs,

Decorated throughout,

Ripped out double doors and made it a through diner,

Built an extension with vaulted roof.

Log fire fitted

Oak floor,

Conservatory built,

Indian stone placed around 360 degrees of the house.

Garage floor fitted,

Drains fitted

Stream fitted with fish and pump and furniture,

Rear garden created with shrubs and plants,

Side garden obtained and planted,

Seating area created,

Orchard started,

Front area planted,

Rear chill out shed next to the stream created,

Log store built in side garden to serve log burner,
Also dream car maintained to a great level.

Oh and all whilst beating cancer, twice. Don’t know if I mentioned that. 

There is a way to fail, but you have to believe that to. Only people that believe they will win, will. You see while we can believe we will fail, we can also believe we will win. People can see what’s not done, or see what’s been done. Yes there are some small piles of bricks, yes I have stuff that’s not moved yet. But there is also a porch that’s not built yet, and a stream that needs finishing (Well building) in the back garden. The roof and rear door needs fitting to the garage and a wall building. But I think it’s best to look at what we have achieved while we could have just let the walls cave in.

My point is, your words can have a devastating effect on people’s lives. But it can be devastatingly positive, or negative. The word devastating can also be positive but then you knew that right? Have you ever seen someone who’s devastatingly beautiful. I don’t mind telly you I have. That lady stole my heart so many years ago and she is the reason I live today, she is the reason all of what I have spoken about has been created.  Her devastating beauty stole me from me. But hey I needed stealing and if I were to start over it would be with you Andie. 

Thank you for all you have done, and all you will do. I ask also that you would forgive my failing as I am not perfect. But one thing is for sure you are perfect for me.  Every brick I move I move for you.

Forever yours

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. I

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

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Who you are.

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Who you are. 

Isn’t this what matters, who we are. In my life I have heard people tell what I am not rather than hearing the good that I am. It’s been tiring to change from what I have been taught, to what I believe now. But it’s true of society as a whole that people seem to focus on what we should be and not what we have chosen to be. Society wants to put us in boxes and have us stay there and be quiet. While acceptance for who someone is, most certainly something I have had to learn. Although I must have just accepted people for who they were as a child. We are taught not to accept certain people arnt we. We are taught that some ways are not the right ways and others are. 

Who are we anyway, that gives us the right to judge another. Should we not just be happy to accept another’s point of view and not change it. Should we not lead by example. Jesus said ” suffer the little children that come into me ” as children we are not consumed by any of the world. Time is all children crave, they only want things because of adverts they may see. 


A man should be strong and not cry says society. Yet I find the tender touch of a man is so much more appealing than a man that is arrogant and boistrois. Maybe that’s because I am boistrois myself. We have puppies here at the moment, and those puppies are showing me who I am rather than what I am not. They trust me, because the do not know anything other than love and tenderness that’s been shown to them. Their lives and what I show them in it will have an effect on them forever. These little guys just trust and love completely. How special that is, to love someone and not expect anything in return. That’s who I am, a man that gives not expecting to receive. I accept people, and dislike people that can’t accept who I am. 


Acceptance is something we have to relearn, after a TV and society has untaught  our innocence. 

There is nothing weak about showing others love and compassion. In fact I would say it’s a quality, how others respond is up to them. For me life is about paying it forwards no matter how it’s received. How someone chooses to be we should I suppose just accept even if it’s not the way we would be ourselves. 

Me I am sensitive, I cry. I can tenderly touch a new born puppy and look in the mirror and like who I am. I can be who I am, and be happy with that. 

Can you?

Have a great day

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. I

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

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I BEAT CANCER!!!!

Remember this! It’s a miriacle when someone beats cancer…

fonzandcancer blogging to encourage.

If your reading I guess it’s because you are happy to hear someone has slam dunked cancer. Well let’s just say I am daring to believe that this is done, it’s not been a breeze. Certainly not a walk in the park or shopping trolley dent done in the supermarket car park. Oh no this was a full on bare knuckled fight to the end, there were not really many moments that were restful, although we did make time for each other on many occasions.


There were many times when I thought I could not carry on, many times I held out my arms and just said “help me” many times I thought I had dug so deep I had nothing more yo give, then found that I was indeed able to dig a little deeper. Many times I felt that I would not be able to do another day…

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Relativity

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Relativity

So is it possible, to change how we feel inside. Is not how we feel relative to our souroundings, is not how we respond relative to what we think and say things will be. Today I want to help you. Someone said to me the other day, that our family has mental health issues. I laughed inside, because I realised at that moment that the persons point of view was indeed right. That her family did have mental health issues, but then as I thought on the sentence and considered it. I realised that the sentence was relative to that persons experience and it was up to me to accept it as relavance in my life or to change what is relavant to us in our lives.

How many times have you said “oh no not such and such again” or “we have to go again” things we do and say in our lives are relative to our surroundings. So whose responsible for these surroundings, the people that suggest the relevancy in our lives. The throw away sentence of “there is mental health in our family” was a statement believed by that person. See my relavancy is this. We have strong people in our family. The two refer to the same thing, but we are taking from it what we deem to be relavant in our own lives. WE (Me and my wife) do our best to turn seemingly negative situations around. That’s why I write. One song we listen to a lot is 

We listened to it a lot when I was having treatment, and we still desire to have the relavance of faith in our lives. I tell my wife often how much I appreciate her, and that there is power in we. I personally believe that forgiveness is one of the most poswerful tools in the world and without it people can’t move on. It’s not possible to find a relavancy that’s stronger than the negativity that surrounds other sentences feeling s and actions. People have said to me “I am depressed” “there is depression in our family” well your right. Because that’s the relavancy you have chosen to adopt in your life. I prefer “We are surounded by fighters” 


Who you are in life depends on your own personal relavancy to situations, you choose to include in your life what ever you believe to be relative to you. One thing I do know and that is I prefer things and people that smile and speak positively. I find people like that relative to how I want to live my life. Now that’s not to say that your not supposed to feel grief, that your not supposed to get sad. Of course you are, again that’s relative to your own situation. If you have just watched someone fight cancer and die, your relavancy would be different to someone that had gotten a disease and chosen to give up to it and die. Trust me the two are the same in that they both involve the person dying. But the relavancy in the two situations are very different. 

LIFE in most situations is up to us, but the relavancy we choose is for sure 100% up to us. What we choose to be relavant to is in a situation is for sure our choice. What others say is their choice. 

My challenge to you is this, can you find relavancy in your situation that helps you today?

I hope you do.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Ps, I have committed to doing this for 365 days every morning, what I ask of you is that you share these blogs I make on email, facebook twitter, you can affect people by pressing a button. Please do that. I asked ppl to share yesterday 18/05/2015 at 8pm they did and 100 people saw my blogs in 2 hours. It only takes a click or two.

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. I

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

Copyright ©2017

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Are you afraid to die?

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Are you afraid to die?

Well asking myself that question, I was but not now. You see my first post in this blog was “I am Mark a cancer fighter, and I WILL win” many have forgotten that was said. One thing I know is that we ALL WILL die. Now for me personally, having been hit with that 500lb yellow fin Tuna right in the face. Yea I have heard it, and then fought it and won. Now whilst that was the toughest time of our lives together. I can tell you now, that people that remind me of the bad parts of me. Well, they just don’t get my time now, those people that don’t like me for me. God loves me just the way I am, but to much to let me stay that way.

You can be if you say you are. It’s been said by me. “You want to know the substance of man, look at his friends”  I am a fortunate man, that I have friends that are the family I choose. People that care about me and us, people that love us. People that focus on what they can do with us, rather than find fault in us. For is it not true that “All have fallen short of the Glory of God.” Without exception. 

This is one of my favourite tunes, and while we don’t know where our world or steps will take us. One thing is certain. That is that from having our first breath means that we will breath our last. As I sat with my wife tonight watching the film ‘miracle’ we were holding hands and I looked around and thanked God for the miracle of life. For sustaining my life and for what he has given me, not what we are left without. Yesterday I spoke how we turned an IVF decision into a positive, and whilst we may never have children because of someone’s power. We will always have today, each other and all we have achieved together. 

It is for sure better to do something than to do nothing. Yes of course it’s also true that if someone says ‘no pain no gain’ then they do not know chronic pain. We have and have not. There are reactions and reactions. All the ones you choose are yours, and are so powerful the choices and actions and no actions we choose in our lives will have a consequence or an impact in this world we live in. That’s why your reading this, because if you did not you would not know what’s written here. You did read this, which will cause your next reaction. Your more amazing than you will ever know, and you will have an impact on the world if you allow it.

That’s up to you isn’t it.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Ps, I have committed to doing this for 365 days every morning, what I ask of you is that you share these blogs I make on email, facebook twitter, you can affect people by pressing a button. Please do that. I asked ppl to share yesterday 18/05/2015 at 8pm they did and 100 people saw my blogs in 2 hours. It only takes a click or two.

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. I

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

Copyright ©2017

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#PuppyWatch

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#PuppyWatch 

So what’s the most amazing thing in life. I have just said it, its life itself. Judging people makes an unhappy life in my opinion, people like some church goers think that having a religion gives them a reason to judge. The hardest thing I think is to come to a point of acceptance for who someone is. To love them anyway even though you may not agree with another’s method. Well that brings me to answer the question as to why we have chosen to have puppies and not children. 

WE DIDNT.

Someone else chose for us, someone with a pen and paper computer and no logic. Someone that said we should have chosen to have children sooner. That we should have considered my wife’s age and mine and not left it so long. You see, when I first got cancer I was told my sperm would stop working, that maybe I should go and store some should I wish and indeed we wish to have children in the future. I was 41 when I donated and hoped one day that we would have children of our own. So I beat cancer and by the time I had regained some kind of strength I found it had come back and would need a transplant of my stem cells to preserve my life. The worst months of my life. All written about here in this blog. 

Sorry
My life has been consumed with hope that one day I would look face to face at my son or daughter. It was not to be and whilst my wife is fit, and has enough eggs we are being refused IVF unless we pay for it. Of course it’s at appeal and even though I have messaged the BBC and many other people no one seems interested that a system that has made me infertile cannot help us. In true Fonz style though. I have started a new journey, the one of new life through the puppies our Miriacle Faith has created. It’s a blessing in a different way. But still life. More people are being touched by the blessing of life because we fought the Evil of cancer. I don’t know about you, but it fills me with a sense of pride. Happiness that others will benifit because someone ticked the NO box. But I do still hope that someone somewhere hears my story who can help us. I will just keep writing and blessing people.


It’s nearly time for our 6pm #PuppyWatch where people will tune in to see their puppies. What a privalage that is, to know such gifts of life because of something that tried to take my life.

You can be anything you choose to be, but surely doing something is better than doing nothing.

Have a great day

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Ps, I have committed to doing this for 365 days every morning, what I ask of you is that you share these blogs I make on email, facebook twitter, you can affect people by pressing a button. Please do that. I asked ppl to share yesterday 18/05/2015 at 8pm they did and 100 people saw my blogs in 2 hours. It only takes a click or two.

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. I

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

Copyright ©2017

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Our puppies.

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OUR PUPPIES

Wow,  how amazing it is to see these little ones grow. So here is the story. I got cancer, I beat it so we bought our dog Faith. I think that would be a stunning enough story in itself. But now we find ourselves at something called #PuppyWatch https://m.facebook.com/Faithblackwell/ is our dogs site where we show all the puppies new movements, the funny little things they do and how they are growing. The puppy watch hash tag above will take you to anything that’s been published by faiths world. It’s funny isn’t it how cancer has given me so much. The last 2 days we have had attacks from people you would expect support from, but yet more and more people are learning around the world about faiths journey and mine by a simple symbol. 


#PuppyWatch

Our lives have literally become enveloped by these little guys. In turn by recording the feeds on Facebook lives many many people are seeing the puppies evolve and are also being blessed. It’s amazing, seeing them enter the world and how innocent and dependant they are on us just to survive. We are sharing the special moments with the world that are not normally seen due to it being so intermate and non interactive to other people. You have to be the pack leader like I am to see what we are seeing and I am loving sharing it all with you all. Like faiths page on Facebook and see all the wonderful family thrive using the #tag we want you to see it all. Here is a short video of a birth, the miracle of life.

I will write the full story as to why we have chosen a puppy family and not a human one in a future post. For now I hope you find it as amazing as we do watching them grow up. 


Have a great day

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Ps, I have committed to doing this for 365 days every morning, what I ask of you is that you share these blogs I make on email, facebook twitter, you can affect people by pressing a button. Please do that. I asked ppl to share yesterday 18/05/2015 at 8pm they did and 100 people saw my blogs in 2 hours. It only takes a click or two.

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. I

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

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Suicide.

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Suicide.

In memory of my friend Gary Townley

Whilst there has been a lot of joy this week, there has been much sadness in my world. I have had a lump in my throat since I found out. I don’t think there has been a moment since Friday that I have not felt sorrow, I always said that suicide is selfish, something only a weak person would do. 

I met Gary through a random advert I put up, some electrical sockets I needed fitting and wiring in my garden and lean to. Peter Pan replied to me saying he could help me and when could he come to look. Gary did a lot for us after that day, and to be honest I used to find work for him to do just so I could give him some money to get by.  Some people in life you just warm to. Gary had a strut when he walked like I had not seen in anyone before, he genuinely cared about people and whilst I won’t talk about his personal life here, I do want to write something that will be there forever when someone googles his name. I struggle writing this, I really struggle as all of my life here in this village has been about preserving life.

When I looked back through his messages he wrote to me, he was crying out. I did call round to see him, I offered him my hand of friendship and he did come round sometimes when he was not working. He was a softly spoken man, but with an air of genuine about him. Fear was his terrible friend and sorry to say that he needed to escape his demonds. So here ya go Gary this letter is for you.


Dear Gary,

I thankyou , for your friendship. For your kindness, the workmanship in our home. You know I still have lights to fit in my house, that you have yet to fix. I have to say, I loved your hat and how different you were. Your dangly cross ear ring. I liked how you wanted to be a good person, and am greatful you wired the extension in our extension. Everywhere I look in my home your hands have been, lights fitted and you even taught me how. The tools you gave me, the care you showed me. Thank you for always doing your best, sad to say you are now at rest. Just wish I could knock your door again, share a doughnut again. It hurt me so to see you so sad, we even cried together. 

We never did have that beer did we. At least you heard my story though, my story of life and not suicide. I feel I should have done more, except knock on ya door. But hey, your demonds are now finished. Your not going to suffer on earth anymore, maybe suicide is actually the hardest thing to do after all. So Gary, goodbye my friend. I will see you again, but not yet. I want to make time to make it matter, my life matter somewhere in some form. God knows you never got dealt the best cards in the world. But you did know happiness at one time.

So Gary I lift my glass, and say thank you lord that I met you.

Rest now mate, and see you soon.

Fonz

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Friends are the family we choose.

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Friends are the family we choose.

As I sit here on the settee minding my Dam ‘Faith’ I am watching the movie ‘CREED’ it’s brought a lot of memories back to my mind. Rekindled my cancer journey and even why I embarked on treatment in the first place. The first reason of course was my wife. My friend turned LIFE long partner, then my wife. Which she will be till my last breath. Loads of things are spinning around in my head, in not very long faith will give birth to her puppies. Life will be because of the fights I have had to have and won. Strange for me to think, that without cancer there would be no Faith. Without cancer I may not have realised who my fake friends were, but also who my real, true friends were and indeed are the family I have chosen.


It’s bringing back to my mind not just why I beat cancer but how. In the film Rocky gets the cancer I had, which opens the flood gates for me every time. I can’t help remembering the day, the day your told what’s making you so tired and weak. You see when you fight cancer, it’s every scan, every blood test every chemo. It’s Avery person that sends you a text that helps you to go that one more round when you think you can’t. That’s what beating cancer is about, ‘one round at a time’ Faiths about to give birth and whilst she will never understand the words I write, our friendship is without a doubt real. 

What ever you face on your journey, I want you to know that you can. That no matter how many obstacles there are in the way. If you keep getting up and moving forwards that you can.  You have to have the heart to stand and move forwards though. I don’t know about you but the friends I call family have given me the strength to get up when I thought I couldn’t. The visits from people when I didn’t want them, because I wanted to give in to cancer and die. I want to right here right now, thank those people for helping me get to today, for my actual family for the love and support they showed me to. That through his people God gave me the strength to choose life.. in choosing life, there will be new life in the form of faiths puppies. 

So thank you cancer, and thank you for helping me choose life.

Together we are stronger.

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

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Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

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Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. I

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them hereby to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something tou you it will to someone else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.

Copyright ©2017