Inspirational people.

Tags

attitude, cancer, facebook, happiness, health, hope, love, Martin house, raise awareness, survivor, tvrcc, twitter

Good morning – here we are again it’s Tuesday. Preparing for the biggest event I have organised. But how was it born, how was our “By eck it’s Yorkshire “ trip inspired. So many of you know I have a daily fight with pain and pushing back the tears is sometimes the only victory I have in a day. I don’t feel sorry for myself I just want to do good in the world. When I met my now friend Richard Sails he was determined to get me to help out in the TVRCC Lancashire region. Being a dyslexic I was concerned about it but I did see it as an opportunity to bless people. After all I don’t feel pain whilst driving my TVR.

So one of the first runs I organised was one to the Lake District to Kirkstone pass and onto Pooley Bridge. On the trip we stopped at Sizergh Castle. I wanted to talk to everyone and as I made my way down the 10 cars I saw my friend Ian. We had been cyber friends for some years and passed each other on events like out TVRCC “Thrills in the hills” event in 2017. The only year prior to this I was a member.

As I spoke to Ian he got out of his car and took a wheel chair out of his boot. As I looked around I could not see a passenger. He proceeded to put on his gloves and sit in the chair and whizz himself to the cafe. I was overwhelmed and could not hold back a tear. He inspired me to do something to help someone or some body of people where ever we run.

It was still a thought process. But him being from Yorkshire along with another inspiring Man and friend of mine. He would not like me to say his name. But Nick is one of those people also that moves forwards what ever life throws. Inspirational and strong!

We did the Rhyl run and in brief wore crazy shirts to support a member lost to cancer. Indeed inspirational themselves. Pam Jeffrey did a lot for others too and even in days before she passed was determined to walk a hill.

On this trip organised by Ian Millington and his son James I saw Ian and Nick again. All the way from the east coast. I had to do something I had to do something closer to them. Which brings me to my friend Derrick who had talked to me earlier in the year about how his son passed away which got my train of thought going as to how to help people like that in the future.

So driving home from Rhyl tired and unable to do any kind of speeds up to the limit of the road, it was slow and I stopped 4 times as the pain I felt would not dissipate. I dearly would have loved to have said something there and made stronger friendships but I knew I was out of steam so headed home. My thoughts were only of how to do something over on the east coast. So they were in their own back garden so to speak so we would make the effort and come over to them.

Little did I know what it would turn into. My friend Rick found Martin house. I made contact with them and we were able to do an event supporting them. I have set my goal high and intend to raise £10000 but maybe it’s a bridge to far but better than doing nothing right. So we are doing a raffle and auctioning some prizes off.

We will be putting smiles on people’s faces and will be doing it all in aid of Martin House in Boston spa. What a privilege to be able to do this. To have the vehicles and “TVRCC “ to accomplish this. So many kind people have helped and I owe a lot to them. Many thanks to you all the Lake District break donated by Mr Rackham, wheels donated by Stuart, racing instruction at Knock hill. Born from seeming negativity.

The Jewellery by “Jo Pratsides Jewellery”

Life’s so precious Sam Pearce-Warrilow has donated a photograph session

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Phots-Shoot-Pro-Photography-In-Aid-Of-Martin-House-Childrens-Charity-/384361150089?mkcid=16&mkevt=1&_trksid=p2349624.m46890.l49286&mkrid=710-127635-2958-0

The wheels donated

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/TVR-Tuscan-20-Wheels-Used-Low-Profile-Tyres-/384356811820?mkcid=16&mkevt=1&_trksid=p2349624.m46890.l49286&mkrid=710-127635-2958-0

A driving tuition day

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Track-Day-Tuition-In-Your-Own-Car-Proffessional-Race-Car-Tutor-/384358623173?mkcid=16&mkevt=1&_trksid=p2349624.m46890.l49286&mkrid=710-127635-2958-0

Autoglym have donated and many many other people including Richard Irons.

People complain about dust, about things that don’t matter. What truly matters is loving people and while you can’t forget your pains it’s good to talk about anything that bothers you and if the person chooses to walk away that’s up to them. Doing your best is what counts. Doing and not complaining. Giving and not counting the cost.

Going forwards I aim to only look forwards and bless people where I can I mean why stop. So many more people will be blessed by this club next few years and I consider it a privilege to be involved.

If your unable to come to the event on the 4th September please do share this post. Please bless people with this post and help us to raise as much money as possible.

God bless you all and I hope this finds you well

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram @dogrupher

@fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Everything you read, are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. People share

with others, if it meant something to you, it will to some

one else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own taken whilst creating memories every day. Some pictures taken by enthusiasts on the day.

You could change a life by sharing this post!

Will you?

Copyright ©2021

Peaks to the beach TVRCC run. Our memorial run for Pam Jeffries.

Tags

#rhyleventsandactivities, #tvrinmotion, #tvrridesout, achieve, awareness, Compassion, faith, raise awareness, survived, survivor, transplant, tvr

Well how can I help you to understand the beauty of unity within a club. Many times since I have been a member of our club, I have had to pinch myself at the thrills this community provides; for other communities as well as our own.

A T350 popping through the tunnels

Yesterday was our run to the beach at Rhyl seafront. It was not just amazing to see all the cars together but to be seen in so many locations by so many people. The internet has been alight since we all parked up at Rhyl .

View from a Tuacan of my car.

I am reminded often being part of this wonderful group of people that where there is unity God COMMANDS a blessing. Many many people were blessed yesterday. Which fills me with a wonderful joy and gratefulness. If you believe or not the fact remains that where there is unity there will always be blessings.

New friends made that will last a lifetime.

We as a club are passionate about our cars and Life.

Meeting friends

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Picking up the new old Chimarea

Pam was sadly taken by an aggressive cancer and we all felt it was a great tribute to her and her life as Pam visited the Ponderosa a lot. Pam loved to drive there and did often. Wonderful to be where Pam had been on our TVRCC event. “Peaks to the beach” and to hug her husband in a truly emotional meeting. Where they both spent so many happy hours with her family.

Rolling through the hills in Dave’s Tuscan

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The cars were seen roaring through the welsh countryside and burbling through villages and open spaces putting smiles upon smiles on people’s faces. It’s such a joy to be a part of something so special and to be accepted by others if your car cost £5000 or £100000 we all have 1 thing in common. Our cars rough or perfect your welcomed. No one looks down on anyone. It’s a beautiful thing.

Louis our budding photographer

Our aim as a club is to help people in their situations what ever they are and to give the gift of joy. To enthuse younger people that the brand is something to be proud of and put smiles on faces.

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So we thank you Rhyl for hosting us and proving us with great food on the prom and hope to be back next year. Unless of course you would like to see us again this year. Have a great evening everyone and thank you all for. A fabulous day.

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Instagram @dogrupher
@fonzymark
Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Everything you read, are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. People share
with others, if it meant something to you, it will to some
one else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own taken whilst creating memories every day. Some pictures taken by enthusiasts on the day.

You could change a life by sharing this post!
Will you?
Copyright ©2021

Rhyly good to see you all.

We can’t wait to see you again.

The link for donations

https://www.justgiving.com/remember/883236/Pam-Jeffery?fbclid=IwAR3GzcPWDI_1AGnRR2uiFnAZkpT_Aj7qgGw7LdjXDpKSlEBYs0yANaSuqHM

Delete button. Or is it the divorce button.

Tags

attitude, divorce, energy, faith, Families, family, health, help, love, partner, passion, raise awareness, relentless, strength, together

Delete button. Or is it the divorce button.

All to easy to do that isn’t it. Press delete and it’s no longer there, the app or the frustrating game you waste so much time playing. But what’s frustrating me so much with this want it now society? Well it’s not the fact that people drive around in cars that they don’t own, or the fact that people want a burger and fries with immediate affect when they want it. Not so much that now isn’t soon enough. My concern is for the mental state of mankind. That it’s becoming so easy to get a 55inch TV without paying for it. That you can get a settee and pay nothing for 2 years or what ever. What bothers me is people don’t TALK anymore. That people have a difference of opinion and that’s the end of that. That friendships and relationships seem to be about what people can get rather than what they can give.

My parents married for 50 years!

That “what can I get” is more heard of than what can I give. You see that’s why relationships and friendships break down. Not because they are not loved by you, or that you are not loved. Infact you are either inconsiderate, or selfish. The world ends up with so much disharmony because people think they can just throw stuff away. Even people are thrown away, which is why device is on the rise. The older generation had it right, once you were married it was for life. Still is in my book. But not all of us have the very noble and healthy opinions. Because it’s all to easy to separate. Than to carry on working things out. 

People that have been married for long periods of time, have to work at it. They have to say sorry and not go to bed on an argument. Me and Andie my wife always start the day with a kiss and end it with a kiss. We always  have a kiss to look forwards to. We trust that we have each other no matter what. Loving someone takes effort it’s not something that’s easy.  I don’t understand these girls and boys that have children together and then split up. 

Listen I know life’s tough, but choose to give and not take away and life would be better for everyone. Putting your arm around someone is not difficult. But saying sorry means so much. Let’s make choices that give, as opposed to taking. To have the attitude, what can I give, is so much more attractive that what can I have. 

Possibly people’s mental health would be improved, and in turn lives children ect ect we all need security. Will you choose to give that? Or do you want what you can get? Choose what’s best for others not just you.

Have a great weekend

Fonz

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter

@fonzmark

Instagram

 @fonzymark

Email – fonzicloud@icloud.com

Our support group on our FB

Cancer stories (people helping people through experience) 

It’s a group where people’s experiences are used to encourage others. 

Everything you read are better based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Pleapse share with others, if it meant something tou you it owill to someone

 else. All images are from a Google search. Or my own, taken whilst creating memories every day.
You could change a life by sharing this post! Will you?

Copyright ©2017

The ripple effect.

Tags

achieve, animal, attitude, blood cancer, Bloodcancer, bone, cancer, desire, destiny, encouragement, energy, facebook, family, friends, given, help, Hodgkin'sLymphoma, hope, hospital, life, lire, love, loved, muscle, neurology, oncology, partner, raise awareness, relentless, silverback, Spirituality, stories, struggle, survived, survivor, together, transplant, travel, tvr, twitter, Writing

I personally would love to start a wave of paying it forward, I remember starting a group called pay back where people put up what they had done for other people in selfless acts. You will never know what your actions do in people’s lives, how much something so little can mean so much. Oh you have heard it before, you don’t want to read because you know what’s coming. Just bear with me. You see I am learning about the ripple effect at the moment, what you do can effect a persons life. But what if that person also decides to do something good themselves, because of what you did. Do we not help to enhance more than one persons life, do we not encourage many without realising it.

It’s like blogging for me, for me everyday it’s about giving something, of course it’s always my time. For me though it’s so much deeper than that, it’s about energy, honesty and showing someone there is hope. Yesterday, although it should be today’s blog. I talked about how I was struggling to rise up above the negativity. How I was finding it tough at times, what happens. Oh well that created a wave, that came and washed over me, renewing my strength by what people said to me. People told me that I should carry on writing, I was encouraged so very much. Because I bothered to write, because I bothered to tell you how I felt. I found something out as well which was quite amazing, that I could never have known.

  
 It turns out that one of the Royal Liverpool staff that came in to make my room spotless everyday has been talking about my blog to other bone marrow transplant patients. Telling them what my website is so that they can read whilst in hospital, being encouraged by what they were reading. I only found out because a friend of mine was round at the house yesterday and she knew the person who had been on the unit having a transplant. It’s such a small world, yet my time in that room is still having a ripple effect. I can’t tell how pleased I was to hear that.

  
Why don’t you start your own ripple effect, it’s beautiful no matter what the reaction. That reaction makes another ripple and before we know it many lives have been touched by that ripple. But guess what, there could be no ripples what so ever if you choose to do nothing. If you choose not to make one, but then you will not achieve anything in another’s life if you don’t start your own ripple. What’s stopping you doing that today, this lunch time, tonight. Don’t put it off rejoice in the day you have today and make some ripples. what ever you decide to do, you will find out sooner or later that it had an effect somewhere. How humbling to know there are people out there still being touched by I ripple Bourne out of a negative situation. If we live then so should we give, it’s the circle of life that makes us stronger.

Have fun and please let me know how you got on.

Have a great day

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else. It took me an hour to write, but will take you a second to share.

5 years.

Tags

achieve, animal, attitude, blood cancer, Bloodcancer, bone, cancer, desire, destiny, encouragement, energy, facebook, family, friends, given, help, Hodgkin'sLymphoma, hope, hospital, life, lire, love, loved, muscle, neurology, oncology, partner, raise awareness, relentless, silverback, Spirituality, stories, struggle, survived, survivor, together, transplant, travel, tvr, twitter, Writing

5years
Wow, we made it if you are reading this, we have been married for 5 years today. There have been times we thought we would not make it due to my illness. But here we are celebrating 5 years marriage after the most cruel 5 years anyone could have imagined. Even yesterday a friend of mine lost his fight. It’s so sad that life has to end at some point, but it’s the same for us all.

  
I don’t want to be alive and do nothing with this precious life, it does not matter to me that we have fought to be here, what matters is that we are here, that our love has lasted. That I have a wife that’s not only faithful, but loves me with her whole heart. I can’t get through today without remembering my friend James we talked often on messenger. It’s amazing to have had a friend in him, an honest fun person.

  
I have to thank my wife for being my rock for 11 years, it’s now our 12th together. But oh what an amazing day 07/10/10 was. I am so grateful to have you as my wife Andie your amazing. Thank you for being with me and making our life together special. Thank you for being there for me always, you are not only my world but my everything. You give me reason to breath, you are my everything.

  
So today, everything is put aside to celebrate our life together, more over because it’s a miracle that I am alive. I thank God, I thank my mum, my dad, and all of my family and friends for all your support to bring us to this day. Thanks to all who are here with us today, your here because you mean something to us.

  
Have a great day.
Cheers
Mark n Andie 
http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

How re mission accomplished feels. Pt 1

Tags

achieve, animal, attitude, blood cancer, Bloodcancer, bone, cancer, desire, destiny, encouragement, energy, facebook, family, friends, given, help, Hodgkin'sLymphoma, hope, hospital, life, lire, love, loved, muscle, neurology, oncology, partner, raise awareness, relentless, silverback, stories, struggle, survived, survivor, together, transplant, travel, tvr, twitter, Writing

Hi all, I had a message from one of our Cancer stories members yesterday asking to hear more about mark, than from Mark. So Leanne storey here it is just for you.

It’s hard to think back and remember how things felt at certain times in this battle, what I do know is that my brain tends to shut out how it really felt. It’s a self preservation part of me, a part of me we all have to protect us. 

  
Before cancer arrives, you are just a normal person that thinks cancer is something that happens to others, not me. I did not know what chemo was, I just knew it was how cancer was treated. I had no picture in my mind as to what it looks like. I had no idea what side effects it had, how sick it made you feel, how emotionally it floors you. 

This is how I see cancer, when you hear you have it you have 2 choices. It’s like you have arrived at the sea front and the only options are to turn left or right. One way is rocky and up hill and difficult, the other is down hill towards a black hole called Death. Which ever way you go it seems a negative way.  I chose the rocky uphill road, because I believed I was more than I had become. That cancer did not belong in my life or body. I did not care what this journey would throw at me, I was determined to win. I was determined to cross the finish line. As I travelled I realised there were more people than I had realised on the journey, my thoughts were to help them no matter what. My odds were not great at getting into remission which made me want to help more people in case my efforts were futile. 

  
As I walked along the road, I saw faces more regularly. My wife all the time, she was and is dependable. She always looked me in the eye with belief, encouraging me. Crying with me, laughing with me, and grieving with me. My parents and my brother were of great strength to us. My sister in law was a great support to Andrea keeping her awake after hospital visits. Bev and Josh did lots of fund raising. The further we walked the more people there were near us. Like a Tour de France uphill stage, the further we went the more people arrived to encourage us forwards. Spurring us on, sometimes looking back at the road with the black hole in it. Wondering if I had gone the wrong way. The road began to break up tumbling down the mountain, the road became a cliff face. A steep cliff which was impossible to climb, but still people remained holding out their hands, they cheered believing we would reach the summit. 

I was getting cut on the rocks, hurt by procedures at times believing cancer would be beaten almost left me. I would feel overwhelming feelings that this could NOT be beaten. 
  You see before I was diagnosed with relapsed Hodgkins Lymphoma  I started the group Cancer stories on face book. It’s now renamed as cancer stories (a support group) this group grew with other fighters, other people that were a source of strength, giving strength to all that were in that group.

Although the feeling on this road were overwhelming the people, Gods people. Were there for me, there for us. People we did not know became friends, and still are friends. Some days were impossible, even minutes became impossible. So I blogged and I blogged and never gave up, taking people on the journey with us, we found that the weight of the people with us was not a hinderance. The strength from them eased the load instead of weighing us down.  The people that were to matter for the rest of our lives showed themselves. People you thought were going to be there for the rest of my life recoiled, showing they did not have the right to be in our future. Learning to forgive those that made those choices learning to pray in a new way. Forgiving people for their limited knowledge and putting in the bin some words people say. But holding so close some of the amazing things people have said to us, holding on to everything that was positive in our eyes.

  
When the trudge was halted by a small shed 15 ft x 12ft a place I was to have a transplant. On looking inside the small shed we saw many jagged rocks, there was nowhere comfortable to sit, there were no comfy seats, no positive words on the walls. As we looked closer though there were allot of people looking through the window. More people than I could count, we were amazed at who was there looking through. They held up signs one said ” in order to see a rainbow, you need to see a little rain” there was no way out of this shed. It was a one way ticket until further notice. A period again of unknown which required faith, love and encouragement. …….. Part 2 tomorrow.

Keep strong

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Being happy.

Tags

achieve, animal, attitude, blood cancer, Bloodcancer, bone, cancer, desire, destiny, encouragement, energy, facebook, family, friends, given, help, Hodgkin'sLymphoma, hope, hospital, life, lire, love, loved, muscle, neurology, oncology, partner, raise awareness, relentless, silverback, Spirituality, stories, struggle, survived, survivor, together, transplant, travel, tvr, twitter, Writing

I have said for a very long time now, but appreciate it even more having gone through the cancer journey twice. That the people that are millionaires in this world, are the ones that are happy. Today we went to a show that I did not want to go to really. The leg pain was unbearable, but even so we did it. My attitude to it stank, I was a grumpy middle aged man thinking about the things I wanted to do. Not what was important for my wife to do.

  
Part way in I realised that I had worked hard to be alive and what was the point in that if I was not to enjoy the day we had together. So I physically changed what my thought pattern was, changing it to a grateful one. One that I appreciated what we saw, appreciated that Andies mum would have been with her today if I had not been there. But Norma sadly is not with us, and I am. I quickly realised that it was a privalage not a chore. But it was up to me to change my own thinking, to be grateful and to think about my Andie not the pain that I am burdened with. 

  
It was amazing, what happened moments later. We bumped into Andies Auntie who lives 50 miles from where we were in southport. It was almost like a acknowledgment that I was putting my wife first. Great isn’t it how it makes us feel to put someone else first, I am just so grateful that I was able to make this happen. Although seeing Andies auntie was awesome and it brought back lots of fond memories of her mum and dad, and other family members. I hope you have had a great weekend and hope you have a great week.

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

How laughter helps..

Tags

achieve, animal, attitude, blood cancer, Bloodcancer, bone, cancer, desire, destiny, encouragement, energy, facebook, family, friends, given, help, Hodgkin'sLymphoma, hope, hospital, life, lire, love, loved, muscle, neurology, oncology, partner, raise awareness, relentless, silverback, Spirituality, stories, struggle, survived, survivor, together, transplant, travel, tvr, twitter, Writing

For me all the way through cancer I have needed people around me that make me laugh, fortunately I have a wife with a great sense of humour. I have learnt to find things funny, I have learnt to feel comfortable laughing at myself. Good job really when you see the reflection I have to look at. I believe laughter disperses the weight that problems give to us. I believe all people should have a day a week where you spend it with people that can make you laugh like no one is watching. Spend time with people that you don’t care what happens whilst your with them because you can be yourself.

  
Us Boys make time every week to have what we call Pool night. Where we all hook up for a game of pool, and some food, it’s a time where we forget the weeks hassle and let your hair down. It’s so vital to our health that we make time for friends as well as the family we have. Friends are our tonic, they help keep us sane and walk our walk with us. These people you will find smiling at you whilst pushing you in the Limo when it’s broken down. These people will show you unconditional love, it’s a beautiful thing. Something I for one absolutely value. 

  
If you know someone that is fighting, give them a smile today. Go on you know it will be good for you to, don’t go to comfort go to laugh together like no one is watching. The down time will be remembered and appreciated.

Mark

Dealing with anger in cancer.

Tags

achieve, animal, attitude, blood cancer, Bloodcancer, bone, cancer, desire, destiny, encouragement, energy, facebook, family, friends, given, help, Hodgkin'sLymphoma, hope, hospital, life, lire, love, loved, muscle, neurology, oncology, partner, raise awareness, relentless, silverback, Spirituality, stories, struggle, survived, survivor, together, transplant, travel, tvr, twitter, Writing

Hi guys, how does today find you. I am verY conscious that people want to turn their back on the exsperiences they had fighting cancer when it’s over. This is because of a few reasons. Your brain is amazing and quickly shuts down memories that are harmful to our future. That’s why I documented my fight so I would not forget. When you fight cancer, you really do have to fight, nothing comes to you easily. It has the potential to make you lose it. What I am about to share with you is very private, but a true example of how I managed to get through the isolation side. There is a particular day I want to share with you, the day I Experienced being neutrapeenic for the first time. Bear in mind your body is capable of overcoming any emotional feeling.

  
Please bear with me while I exsplain. When you go into hospital to have a transplant, the chemo you have pumped into your Hickman line directly into your main arteries. The medicine flattens your blood so you have no defence against germs at all. That’s what being neutrapeenic is, having no defence system, so that when your stem cells are introduced into the body, that your body does not try to reject them. I will attempt to discribe what this feels like.

Ok so the day I am thinking of, I was so very very scared. I felt as though I was falling in my mind, not like I was falling out of a window. But like I was floating very fast towards earth from space. Totally out of control, nothing to hold on to. No where to gain strength, just falling with no way of stopping it. I was shaking bent over, dribbling as I cried with my hands clenched hard. Digging in further than I ever had, I was experiencing feelings I had never known before. Feelings of complete helplessness. Which was making me very angry, I started to imagine ways I could escape from my room, great escape style. Maybe tying sheets together to get away from the feeling you have inside of you.  My wife was sat next to me reassuring me, I remember asking her. “What’s wrong with me Andie” she did not know. We called a nurse to ask her what was going on. I was to hear the words “it’s normal what you are feeling” WOW what relief that gave me. How much relief I felt inside, so although I am out of control ( seemingly ) it was at least normal.
  
Many times in there I got angry, I used twitter to help me. Putting into the search box things like. Positivity, positive, encouragement, belief, anything that would give me positive vibes. Writing my blog for you helped allot as well. Although knowing my wife would be there every morning was the best thing I could wish for. When she left I would go to the bath room, and when I came out she would have gone. But in my mind she would be back in the morning. 

  
The hardest part of cancer treatment, is staying calm and focused whilst enduring the crap you have to face. I say have to, you have a choice to not do it. But not when you have promised your wife and best mates that you will complete the transplant to give yourself the best chance at an exstended life. Cancer stories group was a huge help, and having many people to talk to everyday was such a blessing. You have to use every conceivable tool possible to keep yourself from losing it. Having a long suffering wife is a huge blessing to. 

The purpose of this honesty is to say. You can be the very best of you in that situation, should you choose. You can achieve what ever you decide to. It boils down to a decision that you make, many things can make us angry. It’s how we respond that matters.

Have a great day

Mark 

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Your beautiful. (No really YOU are)

Tags

achieve, animal, attitude, blood cancer, Bloodcancer, bone, cancer, desire, destiny, encouragement, energy, facebook, family, friends, given, help, Hodgkin'sLymphoma, hope, hospital, life, lire, love, loved, muscle, neurology, oncology, partner, raise awareness, relentless, silverback, Spirituality, stories, struggle, survived, survivor, together, transplant, travel, tvr, twitter, Writing

Who are you? Those words, they just leave so much unsaid. But I want you to look in the mirror today, I just want to to have a word with the person in the mirror. Because you are beautiful, you are the one. No one else can walk your steps and be you. I am not saying your perfect because no one is, but you have beauty. You chose and choose to see it or not see it. Have you watched the lion king? I know I have mentioned it before but YOU are more than what you have become. You are so much more, and the beauty that’s in you can only be brought out by you.  it’s you who chooses to see it or not.

  There are so many people that need what you, and only you can offer. It’s in your hands, to see what you want to see. You see for me it’s a clarifying moment for Simba the Lion, he saw his own reflection in the water. What everyone sees right. Wrong. People don’t see what you look like, they only see that when they first meet you so they are able to tell what you look like. What people see is in what you say, what you do, and how you smile. Your beauty can be seen from far away if we allow it to be seen. The guy that asks for your change everyday, he sees your beauty. 

  
What I love about this part of the movie is when the monkey replies to him. Simba says “it’s just my reflection” the monkey was trying to get Simbe to see that his father was alive. He says “Simba, look harder” only then does he see the reflection of his father in the water.  That’s because we have our parents in us. We are a reflection of what our parents have taught us. The parts of them that we choose to be, and the parts of us we let others see of us. This song says what I am trying to say to you. 

When I travelled across Australia I found my inner beauty, some people call it insecurity when they don’t allow someone to see inside them. I call it stubbornness, the longer we don’t let people see who we are is more time when we can’t truly bless someone. 

  
I hope you can become your Beautiful? I hope you choose to allow someone to see who you really are. I remember 20 years ago, I was walking threw Exeter. I had a little time to kill as I was going to get on a bus bk up to Lancashire. There was a guy begging, so I sat down next to him and opened my sandwich box. I turned to him offering him 1 of my 2 rolls. It was an unspoken moment that we shared, but I know he remembers it like I do. That’s called showing your inner beauty, not wanting anything in return just allowing someone to see how beautiful you are. 

The most precious gift in life is free, LOVE.

Have a great day

Mark
http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Travelling guy.

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10.10am and I am still in bed, leg pain is bad today. So is the ill feeling so I am resting today. So here is a blog I wrote some time ago for you.

Travellinguy 
Back in 2003 I sold my house in Preston put all my property in storage and got my dad to drop me off at airport.

  
Sat at the airport with a rucksack and a few quid, it was going to be an adventure. A time to find out who I was, as I sit here in isolation disconnected from the world 1 of the only ways to keep sane is to remove yourself from the situation in your mind. So right now I have just landed in Perth. I was to meet a guy with an Aston villa top on, never having met him I had no idea what to expect. He was a short stocky guy with a bald head. We smiled at each other and that familia sound of that horrible Midlands accent came out. But it was kinda diluted by a Aussie twang and sounded quite cool.

 
Many things were to happen before me but after he feel asleep at work and printed 38 pages off of the letter p that was the end I had to leave. I had bought a car, picture below. Blow up mattress in the back and off I went on the adventure of my life.

  
To places with 2 Swedish girls with me, the most boring girls I had ever met in my life. I was not to leave them until I got to Albany where I just got up real early got money off them for the fuel they owed me and drove off to Esperance. 

   
Esperance is where I will leave writing this blog today. But the point of this blog is to say. You have amazing u inside you, you just have to be willing to allow yourself to find it. Love you, don’t take any negatives from anyone. Be the best you can be, love the best of your ability but most of all find the real you. The you that’s amazing, refuse anything the world says and protect your heart and what you believe in. Go where you want to go, and let nothing stop you from achieving what you feel you can.

  
You are unique and no one is on YOUR journey.
Have a great day
mark

Christmas Eve 2014

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Update – so house phones rings, it’s my consultant. I am thinking well he must be ringing to let me know the results of the needle biopsy. Alas it was inconclusive. Which means I have to have it cut out of my neck after all. Right now right at this moment I am definitely contemplating (thinking) of just not having a second lot of chemo. See the facts are I live everyday with pain in my legs, walking the dog is not even a consideration some days so I run her in the garden instead. My hands are numb most of the time, and the chemo they propose is 1500 times stronger than the last lot. They can’t tell me what damage will happen above what I have already. So I quander live what I have left. Or have the chemo that will make the damage to my body worse. Some of you know what I face, see last time I went on a trial which meant the information they learnt would save someone’s life maybe. So of course I went on the trial. There is no chance of a trial this time. It’s just to save my life. Dunno how I feel about it really, just unhappy and furious. Sorry to witter. Above was written October 2014.

Seems light years away since I wrote the above words, but every word is the truth. 

  
I would need to go in for a pre op, it’s like an mot, or a check to see how well you are. To see if you are fit enough for an operation. The lady there had had cancer herself, she was quite upset herself talking to me as it brought it all back and I guess she was reminded what is involved in my journey ahead. We are all human, and I guess when you work in the medical profession you have a caring nature, and compassion. We have to bear that in mind when we talk to folk, it does not matter where we work. We all have feelings.

The day of the operation was Christmas Eve, I decided to drive myself to the hospital in my Rocky balboa robe that my sister had bought me. The eye of the tiger should have been playing thinking about it, it was just my way of getting strength to go through with it. 

  
Of course I got some looks but I didn’t care, I had to find out if it was cancer again. The only way to do that was to have the mass removed from my neck. I had had this operation before, but last time I was awake whilst they took a slither sample. They said 20 minutes but it took 1hr 20mins awake and remaining still whilst they cut away. I can’t remember a time that I was more scared, I remember praying out loud for God to help me as they wheeled me into the theatre. Bear in mind I was not aware how hard cancer was to beat the first time, I just knew that being at stage 4a was very advanced. Having beaten it at that late stage, you may think I had confidence I would beat it again.

  
 The answer to that is No. I could not have all the information, all I needed to know was what I needed to do next. What I needed to prepare myself for next, not in a few months! now. By taking 1 step at a time was vital. Although I was aware of what was ahead, all those steps had to put to the back of my mind whilst I just concentrated on what was next.

  
No one knows except the person who is told they have cancer what it feels like to hear those words. I can still feel that feeling, even smell what it was like. I can’t exsplain that. I remember asking my consultant questions like. What happens if I don’t have chemo, then hearing the Brutal words “you will die” Andie said my face changed at that moment. 

  
Now you have to know, I am very very confident in how I do everything in life, I believed I would beat what ever life threw at me, I even remember Andie looking at me saying, “you can do this” I whole heartedly believed it. That I could do it what ever it was, right up until the moment I got my answer to that question. It’s hard to be told you WILL lose your life because of cancer, now I know my journey has not been as bad as some. Really..? Cancer is cancer and it’s horrific what ever has to be done to beat it.

 I am documenting my journey even writing a book. Which I plan to finish before the end of the year. I want others to know that your not alone there is help out there. 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/1595998743956536/

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

You are not alone.

Now I am recovering, and still positive in my recovery, but hope everyday to help someone out there. That’s all I want to do every day, encourage you.

  
Have a great day

Mark

Giving is a beautiful gift.

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The best things that have happened to me this week have been born out of giving. It’s amazing the pleasure I get from it. Take seeing my parents this week, you can’t go out and buy the look my dad gives to me when he claps eyes on me. It’s to be treasured. My wife Andie has made me see that, time can bring its last tock at any moment. Why some people are taken early and others have a long life is just the way life is.  But you never know how much you will miss them till they are gone. Just to see my dads face light up yesterday was worth the effort that’s floored me today.

  
See the point is, (this I got from my wife to) it’s not what you do for someone when they are gone that matters. It’s what you do when they are here that matters, how you make them feel inside when you see someone. What you give does not need to cost money, it’s time that means so much as far as I can work out. Time with people that matter to you, so that when they or you have past you leave behind happiness and memories.
  Since being infected by cancer, I have chosen to bless others where ever possible. I hope every time I write that someone chooses to do something they otherwise would not have done. Don’t think about it, make it a memory, I am proud to be married to such an amazing person. Now I think it’s time to give to her, in the shape of a thrashing at pool. 

  
Have a great weekend

Mark.
http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Why me.

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Have you ever done that, wondered that question. I know Balliotelli did. But I don’t mean why me, in the sense of why I got cancer. More why did I survive, why did I make it. What’s the reason behind it. All I know is I am a prayed for man, many people around the world have held me in prayer, some people (well most) don’t even know me. I have a loving family for which I am grateful for.

  
Sometimes though, even though I have allot to live for as we all do. I just feel an overwhelming feeling of guilt that brings me to tears. That I made it where others didn’t, but maybe that brings others hope that there is some light in the darkness we all call cancer. This invasive intruder of life we call cancer, it has no right to come and change the direction of our life. You spend so much time getting into remission, then hear of someone who did not make it. You feel like you want to take their place, that it should be you that was there. I don’t understand all these feelings, but what I do know is that I long to use this negative experience to help others. NO MATTER what I WILL tell my story. 

  
Life is about learning, then giving, or sharing what we have learnt. My hope everyday is that someone somewhere is encouraged to carry on, get up, or keep moving forwards. I want to take nothing from this world just encourage. That’s all. To encourage people to keep moving forward no matter how small the steps are. It’s about moving forward, no matter what. 

  
I don’t have all the answers, but I still have a life. I intend to use my life to encourage others every day.  Whilst struggling to answer my own unanswered questions. No matter what there is always morning, and morning means I am alive and there are opportunities to be a better person and use this life I have been given.

  
What ever you give, will mean something to someone somewhere. So I encourage you to encourage others, no matter what. Imagine if everyone did the same, the world would just be full of awesomeness. Whilst I am not there yet, I WILL never give up. 

Markwww.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Today we celebrate Grandma Jennies life.

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It’s hard to find the right words today, being a day we remember a life that’s lived for over 90 years. It drives it home again once more how short and precious  this life we live really is. 

  

Everyone who holds Grandma Jennie dear are in our prayers today. Love and prayers to all the family.
Sorry it’s short today, but don’t forget to tell your loved ones you love them today.  Enjoy having them with us. Instead of regretting what we didn’t do.

.
 
 

GRANDMA JENNIE – Today Is your day,  a day we remember and pray. We will miss you gramma Jennie,  your smile I miss more than any. I know you are safe, in a special place now. We will see you again, but not yet, not yet. You won’t be made to walk again, never again will I see you here. But Grandma Jennie – you will know when I think of you.  Goodnight Grandma Jennie, and God bless. 

XxxxX

A tribute to Norma Winn. 70 today.

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A tribute to Norma Winn.
If Norma was with us today she would have been 70. Norma was taken suddenly, non of us expected it to happen so quickly. Norma was a Manchester City fan, not a part time football fan. She was an avid fan passionate about the game and absolutely loved Franny Lee. I remember chatting to Mike summer bee one afternoon, I rang Andie who seemed hysterical at the other end saying “my mum would have loved to have spoken to you” 

  
Norma gave birth to 3 girls in her life, Malcolm had an adopted daughter to. Although I was not there in the family whilst they grew up together, I believe football took a big part in their lives. Norma was the secretary to wilmslow Albion and the family all pulled together whilst making the football club a success.

  
My own experience of Norma was a very nice one, she did not complain. She did her best and worked right up to her last days. She made fancy dress costumes for her daughters boys, ironed the uniforms etc. She was just so kind, considerate and a best friend to Andie my wife.

I remember taking Norma out, it was a big deal for me as I was to ask for her eldest daughters hand in marriage. Up I rocked with my shirt and tie on expecting to take her somewhere expensive. Where did she want to go. Burger King, ok we can do that I said. So off we went to Burger King, I had a whopper with a strawberry milk shake. I was soon to learn that that was exactly what Malcolm used to have. We sat down, and I asked her if she minded me and Andie getting married. She was so pleased, and said she would need to buy a new hat. I loved that lady, so innocent and loving. 

  Norma’s mum, and Bev.
Norma had a brother called Phil and a sister called Anne. Norma had her mother live with them for many years 16 years I believe giving up much of her time to look after her. It was a big sacrifice for Malcolm and Norma to make. This just showed what amazing people they were, whilst looking after 4 children. 

Norma would have been 70 today, Norma died suddenly from Liver cancer, although the primary was never found. All I ask is you like this for Norma. We miss you. X

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

So what’s life like. After transplant?

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Ok you ready for a dose of real honesty from Fonz. This is the true me, just like you really, I got hungry and ate. I got tired and pushed myself past being tired. I did my own shopping, I enjoyed weight training. I can safely say I enjoyed my life. It was a life where I did not fear anything much. Apart from spiders and snakes, I was cool with most things.  I didn’t really have money worries, because I used my abilities to bridge the gap. In fact you would think life was great for us. That is if you never considered cancer, taking both My wife’s parents at a young age. Your never forgotten, Malcolm and Norma. We are here in their honour.

  
I never considered what was in foods, I did not consider much to be able to harm me. That’s pretty much all of us though isn’t it. We just get on with our lives, not even thinking to take a breath, considering how fast our heart beats. It just does it, and we take it for granted. We never consider it, you may never have considered it until now. Humans are amazing, how we work is absolutely astounding. How do we last as long as we do.

I had become as complacent with life as I had with my body working in harmony. I just had a zeal for life, I never expected anything to go wrong in life, I only ever expected to win. Even if I lost I believed I would win the next time. 

  
Then I found myself in a place where everyone tip toed around me, held me like broken glass felt sorry for me and did not know what to say to me. It was like I had a, oh. I did have a disease. But why was I ostracised  why did people stop talking. Why didn’t some people treat me like they did before, then you think how hard it must be for them to watch a person they love to endure such a thing as Cancer. You see people go into survival mode, where you have to save your own life. Yea all sounds a bit dramatic doesn’t it. Maybe that’s because it is exactly like that, but you just yearn to be treated normally. To talk about normal stuff and to laugh at normal stuff.

  
 I have been treated for cancer twice now, and we live a very different life to that which we had before. We don’t take our breath for granted, when we hear birds sing we listen, when butterfly’s show themselves we are grateful. I appreciate bees, watching the cat play. Seeing the cat lick the dogs ears and visa versa. Everything is so much more important since treatment, the love people show me I value more. People, friendships and other people become more real as you realise how precious they are. 

  
Everything I do now has more meaning than ever before, because I have learnt. I have learnt one thing. That the life we live is a gift, a very precious gift. What cancer has given me is an ear to listen and eyes to see. I personally do not hate the journey we have had, rather thankful my eyes can now see just how amazing life is. I would never have felt this joy to see people enjoying life if I had not had these steps to walk. It’s like having the path before you lit by a thousand candles. 

  
Thank you to all my friends that have helped us push the limo  and continue to do so as my body holds me back, whilst my body is weak I will continue to tell my story. Remember how amazing you are. Have a great week.

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Remembering people.

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Good morning, how are you today. My thoughts are with family’s of people that have been lost today. People who have been left behind. As I do, I start to feel Grateful that I still have my life. That I WILL get stronger once again.  I am thankful for all those that are in my life, and for those that did not make it to my future.

  
Don’t forget about the families left behind will you, try and remember them today and send them a message, or maybe use that thing they call a phone. Send some cheer, some love and encouragement today, you may want to  take some food to them. It must be hard to be left alone, especially after a full life together.

  
I was stood on the brow of the marshes yesterday, a short walk from the car. It was so nice with the wind in my face to hear the music being carried on the wind all the way from St Anne’s festival. To see the birds nesting, and just hear nature at its best. We don’t know what we have till we have to live without someone, or life changes abruptly. It makes me more determined to enjoy today with the people that are in it. Life is our gift to use, thank you for being a part of mine.

  
Mark

Www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

How writing has helped me beat cancer.

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Every day I have tried to write a blog, since being admitted to hospital for 3 weeks. Some blogs have just been a means of focusing on something different. Remembering good times in our lives, feeling useful that I perhaps encourage some folk by what they read. Maybe even what you have read, blogging has been a great distraction from the reality I faced on some occasions. As it draws close to scan time, I am nervous that the stubborn mule has stayed. But hope and pray it will be a time to celebrate. 

  
What I have tried to do, is to turn a negative situation into something positive. I don’t know how many blogs I have done to date but it has to be over 100. I have challenged myself to write 1 a day for 365 days. We have a small group on Facebook called #365 day writer challenge. It’s just a place to blog. Writing has been an outlet for me, let’s have it right, there were not allot of things I could do. So I am very grateful that I have been able to see writing as not only an exspression, but a way of giving something to others. 

  
See some people need to help others, some people don’t feel good inside unless they have witnessed a smile from someone that you gave them. I am one of those people, I love to see a face light up because of what they read. I know I can’t actually see the effect it has on people. I learn that people like or are affected by people’s comments. It so nice to smile myself because you had made someone smile when in a situation where you really feel you can’t smile. 
  
So blogging has been a real blessing to me, you have blessed me by reading this. Thank you, thank you for your encouragement, for your uplifting words and the things you have done for us in this situation. The things you have done for me without knowing it. It’s amazing how the circle of life works, how giving makes you feel so good. How the reaction of someone else can be changed just because you read something uplifting. Well I hope you are able to enjoy the sun today. I wish you all the happiness you deserve and more. Happiness is what makes us millionaires. 

  
 Have a great day

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Energy you give to others.

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You may never know how much you affect someone’s life, how much the things you do mean to someone else. I guess the greatest measure of how others are affected by something is how we ourselves are. I try to find positives in everything I am faced with, I choose to see the good in people not the bad. However I am finding it strange that the first thing I think of sometimes is not positive. I am training myself. Although my wife does a pretty good job of reminding me what my blogs have said.

  
I believe just a compliment can make all the differance to someone, imagine doing something that warms someone inside. It’s amazing to get that feedback. You know what I have learnt recently is very special. So simple yet so effective to everyone.

That is, that every time I/we do something for someone and they feel good about themselves and I/we find out, it makes me feel awesome. So in doing something for someone else we actually make ourselves feel better, it has a similar effect to me as laughing, such is the feel good factor. Why have I not learnt this sooner, that life is about how you can affect someone in a positive way. Can you imagine the effect on the planet if we all did that everyday. The world would be full of people smiling at each other, life’s not like that is it. 

  
That is the reason I do it though, because it’s not the way of the world. I was never a follower, always wanted to do things differently. The first exsperience of cancer I wasted, I am determined that this experience will be positive to others. I want to thank you for reading, and hope that you will share what you read so others can benefit aswell. That could be the thing you do for someone right now.  I don’t know why I want to share this link in particular, apart from it really spoke to me. I hope it speaks to you to.

 http://youtu.be/RX_HvLVOEZ0

Have a good day

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

What people think.

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Its amazing how our very opinions of a person can be changed by what they wear. Don’t you think it’s amazing how children just don’t care what your wearing unless the parent has taught that child what trends are. That they will look silly wearing certain things at certain times. I watched the below video and it got me thinking.

  
What really motivates people, what really makes people think nice thoughts about others.  Because it seems we are in a world where people seem so hung up of what we wear, how we look. The next trend etc. I absolutely love it when I see people working together to make something happen. 

  
When I was in hospital I had a team of people with me, these people were encouraging, motivational, and considerate towards me. At a time in my life where I needed people in it. Cancer stories is there to support people facing cancer in what ever guise.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/1595998743956536/

These people did not care what I drove, where I lived, they just cared and said what they could to encourage me. I truly don’t know what I would have done if those people were not there to turn to.  But what I do know is that there are amazing people out there who are “human kindness” they are an example of what human kindness is. 

  
Be the guy that helps the struggling mum off the bus, the person that slows to let someone cross, as opposed to getting cross because you have to wait a few more seconds.

Trust me when I say there is so much truth in the circle of life, one of the main principles I live by is. You reap what you sow. Fact. What we give always comes back around to bless us sooner or later. I hope this video blesses you like it blessed us.

Have a great day

Markwww.fonzandcancer.com
Follow me on Twitter
@fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

You are what you say you are.

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What we say is what we are, you ever heard somebody say words like. I am useless, what we say we are is what we are. Let’s look into it a little. When I was told I had cancer, I told cancer I would win. I told cancer I would not accept you here. I spoke nothing negative intentionally, every action was to defeat cancer.
  
One thing I know is what I am about to tell you. It changed my life when I realised. You see I believe in God, I believe in satan to. I believe God can hear everything we say, I also believe satan can to. I believe that God knows what I am thinking, I also believe that satan can’t. Yep that’s right, only God knows what is in our minds. Therefore only God hears our non audible prayers right. Then surly if we only ever speak positivity in our lives, positivity to others. Believe positives, speak, and act positively. Will affect you and others in a good way.

  

How can a person be brought down by words, that speak strength, power and positivity in someone’s life. Now don’t think I am this amazingly positive guy that’s never down. Of course I do, but every time I am there, I speak out with faith, I speak out believing that I will achieve what ever I set out to do. Not being swayed by people’s negativity.

  
What we say we are is what we become, the only trouble is. When we speak it out loud both good and bad hear the words. Our weapon is what we say in our minds, what we say in private can be so effective. You are what you say you are, people will believe what you say you are.

  
I don’t want to hear words like “can’t” I want to hear words like “will” you are without doubt more than what you have become. We are all living a life, it’s our choice what we do with it. But then sometimes a stumbling block gets in our way, which means our lives have a different direction chosen for us. That does not mean you are less, it means you are more because you have more to deal with.

  
Do your best to speak strong positive words into people’s lives and you will win your battle. Go try it and see.
When I was 4 I asked God for a bike, then in the same prayer thanked God for the bike I did not have yet. Believing I would get a bike. It was red with solid tyres, I loved it. What will you believe?
Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Follow me on Twitter @fonzmark
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Day before ICE March 2015

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Ok so tomorrow is first chemo day, but let me just tell you   a little story. So today we were having chilli sausage and bacon baps at ours today. Johnny Wilson Karl Boardman Alison Wilson and Chris Dale came to see us. We had a few games of pool and then went for a walk. We jumped a couple of brooks, threw the ball in the estuary for the dog and just chatted and laughed. It was really nice, quality time with good friends. As we strolled back we came across quite a wide brook hardly any water in it. But at least 10 feet deep I really was contemplating jumping it. Till Johnny (Against the opinion of the group majority. Said) “I can do that.” Ok I said “after you” at which point Johnny jumped.
  
Now you know how ducks land on water. Well that was how he landed. His feet carried on forwards as his body fell backwards. Now I have to say at this point I was very sorry I did not have my phone with me, as I had dropped it earlier. I was very disappointed I could not take advantage of this tremendous photo opportunity.

  
Johnny had managed to fall all the way down to the bottom. Funny though as he seemed to be in the recovery position growning in pain. I asked him if he broken anything he said no. His wife however was holding back her laughter. And eventually did one of those very hearty laughs.

I don’t think Johnny liked us laughing at him ALL the way back to the car.

  
Karl Boardman got int front and put on the blonde wig ( prefer blondes ) we have in our car. I have pictures if you want to see.

  
Sadly not of Johnny because on his removal from the embarrassing position he put himself in, it revealed the wheel that his whole body had been impailed on. Johns reaction when he saw it was “it’s not even an alloy” n they said master cards are priceless.

  
The next day was to be the first day of treating relapsed Hodgkin’s lymphoma. That was nearly 6 months ago, we find out next month If it’s been kept at bay. Have a great day. 
Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Human kindness

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Why is there hate in the world, what motivates someone to harm another human being. What motivates a person to show Hatred towards their fellow man, I guess it’s a differance of opinion. Is it? I mean let’s make it simple, what has it got to do with me what, or who someone decides to worship. What has it got to do with me if someone decides to live in a certain way.? How does it affect me? It’s doesn’t does it? What matters is what we do for others, how we are with other people. Isn’t it better to concentrate on us and make sure we are doing things that we believe in as opposed to worrying about what others are doing. Isn’t life about example. About making the first move ourselves as opposed to wanting life to change, and others to change.

  
I personally love to think that a simple act has changed the direction of someone’s life, I love to think someone has done something nice for someone that makes a differance to them. That improves the direction their life was headed. Would it not be better rather than complaining about people. Rather to lead by example, helping the world to be a better place with every act. I know life is not like that, but what’s stopping us.

  
Would you step out and make the world a better place somehow, would you do something for somebody to help their lives and get nothing in return. Do something for someone without reward, just because it benefits them and not you.

  
It happened to me yesterday, someone paid my bill and gave us some human kindness. The feel good factor felt great, now I am not saying go and spend money on others that you have not got. But what I am saying is give what you can this next week. Just once to one person, give them something. Your time, your energy, money, love, whatever it is make sure it helps someone. I will do the same, and look forward to telling you how that worked out next week. I just put into YouTube “human kindness”  this is what I decided to post in this blog.

Life is your choice

Mark
http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

The dream

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The dream for me was always way above what I could reach, pie in the sky some might say.  Well that certainly was not the case, I mean how hard can it be to have standards and stick to them. I have had to meet allot of people to find the right person for me. A person that would allow me to be me, someone that would laugh whole heartedly with me. Someone that was secure in who they were, somone who was not afraid of work. She did not have to be a super model, but I certainly did not want to wake up scared of what I saw every day.

  
To fulfil a dream, everything has to be the best. In a dream impossible things are made possible, made possible by the amazing imagination that we all have. What we dream is not always the best for us though, there is someone who has better plans for us than ours could ever be. For ours are restricted by us, we always come in the way are try to make our dreams tangable.

  
The reality is this cliche “you have to have a dream to make a dream come true”  so dream as much as you like. Because the dreams you have WILL come true if you believe they will. You have to believe, and in believing be prepared to put in the effort. As life moves on our exspectations change, what we hope for changes and we start to persue different avenues. I guess some may say I live the dream, roof over my head, an amazing wife, our lab Faith and of course our puss in boots Jenson. 

  
 The one thing you have to have before a dream comes a reality, is belief. Belief it’s possible, and belief in yourself to make it happen. There are to many unhappy people in the world because they settled for second best. In doing that contentment is never achieved, the best for us leads us to be happy. Oh how I love to look out of the window and see our garden grow. But better I like to look at our garden grow with my wife by my side.

  
There is no reason for you to stop believing in your dream in a different way. Just because life throws you a rough deal we can still find beauty and happiness if we choose. Anyone can sit in a seat and complain. It’s the winners that get up everyday and make it happen. We all have points where we get slowed down because of the things that happen in our lives. Just make sure you never lose sight of your dream.

Mark
http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Determination

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This is a word that I have come to understand in many different ways over the past few years, although I have come close to the word in different situations. The translation of the word speaks of success because of grit and determination. I am not so sure if all determination brings success, in my case it gave me more life to enjoy. I suppose that can be classed as success. It just depends what you see as success.  I don’t think things is a mark of that, I personally think if you want to see the substance of a man look at his friends.

  
Mine are very diverse, but one thing all of them have in common they are considerate. They are all caring people, always wanting to help others as they walk the path we call life. I have been very disappointed by some people I regarded as friends, people I had been there for were not there for me when I needed them in my fight with cancer. I cannot come up with the answers as to why people would all of a sudden become silent because you are in trouble with your health. If you have any thoughts I would be glad to hear what your opinions are.

  
Love is the greatest gift of all the Bible teaches us. But despite the bible teaching this, I hold this opinion anyway. What greater gift is there to have from someone other than love. It costs nothing, yet means everything. It brings renewed energy, but yet costs nothing. I believe that it’s actions that show a person not words, so anything you do for a person shows the love you have within you. You were given the gift of love within you when you were born. But you learnt how to hate, you were taught it, by television, others opinions, reactions and actions showed you how to be horrible. But you never had to learn how to love. Why?

  
Because every person is born out of an act of love, you already knew what love is. Something you never had to learn, but what you can do is learn how to use your free gift better than before. All you have to do is do. It’s that simple do for someone else not you, it’s the secret to success. The secret is giving. Someone said to me there are two types of people in life. Givers and takers. By being determined you can make more of a difference, a determined person, makes things happen. Someone that takes is restricted by their lack of determination. Your choice to be determined will change lives.

  
But that’s your choice.

Mark
http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Life is a gift.

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You ever sat down and truly tried to understand what makes YOU work. That your heart, lungs work without having you thinking about it seamlessly whilst you go about your day. How amazing it is that we are given time on this earth, it does not matter how long we are here for each day of our lives is a special gift. 

  
As I was writing this, I felt compelled to go across to see the lady with the beautiful smile. Wendy is her name, only to find her mum had died. How very very sad, that today she was taken. It was a privalage to sit with her and her son for a short time speaking fondly of Grandma Jenny’s life and memories. Life is indeed precious and who would have thought it would have been shown to us today in such a real way. Can we just pause for a moment and say a prayer.

  
“Father thank you for this gift of life, you have given to us. Please draw close to grandma Jenny’s family at this time. Show them your love through the Holy Spirit in Jesus name I ask. Amen

Thank you for reading today, but I find my thoughts are with this family today. Even though this is the case I still feel compelled to finish writing this. 

It’s you that has the gift of life, it’s a gift you have been given. Use it well, use your exsperiences well. Even if you have a life threatening disease, your fighting. What ever situation you find yourself in please use it the best you can. Bless others with the breath you have, help others to know there is hope. Give with a pure heart never counting the cost. I for one will do my best to love my fellow man and help someone today to see how precious this life is. 

  
You are unique no one else can do what you can the way you can.

Have a great day.

Mark
http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Compliments In cancer.

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Good morning, I hope your feeling good. I want to share with you again today how I feel, what makes me feel good as a cancer patient, or even as I am now in recovery. The sentence we all dread “you look great” as a seasoned cancer patient, these words grate on me. We all know we don’t look grate, we have had chemo and or radiation. Which makes us look crap, our hair falls out, (in all locations) your skin colour changes and you actually look fatigued. Now I don’t want to go on about how the things people say make us feel bad rather I would like you to know things we appreciate. These things are usually unspoken.

  
A hug – man, I can’t tell you how much energy a hug gives me. It’s like you have pulled into a petrol station and are being refilled with love. We often have so much on our minds, when’s the next appointment, what can’t and can I eat. Have I had enough water today, did I have my anti sickness, did I take my tablets at the right time. All these single tasks take us away from normal living.

  
A meal – this means a colossal amount to a home that’s buried in cancer, a home affected by cancer. Because eating is actually perfunctory, you have no taste, and most things taste like rubber. But a good nutritional meal brought to your home, gives rest bite. Not only for the person with cancer but for the person caring. A one pot is usually perfect.

  
Note – please make sure extra care in cleanliness is taken if doing this for someone on chemo. Also to check what things they are maybe not allowed.

A cuppa – this must come without the question “how are you doing” ( How am I doing …. Man I am mid chemo) is what we think whilst smiling and saying ” yea not bad thanks” whilst also thinking there will be blood spillage if they ask that again.

  
A smile – a really nice genuine smile really boosts me I can’t speak for anyone else. But I have a Nieghbour and when she smiles at me I know she means it, and warms my heart.

  
A few encouraging words – like your doing great keep it up. Comments about your garden or something else can be a real God send as you don’t think about cancer for that period. It’s all you think about is CANCER. It’s a massive stone around your neck. 

A phone call – talk about something you both love, that’s easy with my brother as we both love anything with an engine. Try and get the person who has cancer to engage with you about what you both love note – they may be exstemly fatigued sometimes best to text before calling. But trust me it’s nice to get a call from someone. If they call you, then you are trusted to make their day that little bit better.  

i believed people when they said “you look better without hair” that’s not the right thing to say to a girl. In a female case I may ask if they want to make any changes. It’s about providing a need for a sufferer not your need to see them that is important here. People say to me “I need to see you” what is that all about. I mean where are the thoughts for the person suffering there. 

Look I know it’s tough for everyone.

Never ever forget the carer. I remember the people that asked about my Andie and still do, generally if you ask how the carer is it goes a long way and they may even forgive you for saying they look great. People like this are genuine friends with a huge heart for you. I am so fortunate, I have a number of good friends like that.

  
The best compliment you can give someone is to say “I WILL be there for you, and will call you soon” please note. You know where we are if you need anything!! Is not any help what so ever. In fact it’s just someone to remember. But contact via text, sending happy vibes is so needed and nice. You know your cared for. That’s the bottom line really, the best compliment is knowing your cared for by what ever action you think is fit. It does include the word action though. Friends know they are friends by what they do, not what they say.

  
Lastly laughter, make sure you laugh.

Mark
http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

88lbs of cheese.

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When I was leaving school we had to do something known as a YTS, (youth training scheme) I opted to do retail. My first placement was at a fruit and veg stall in our local kwick save in leyland. I was given the opportunity to work on the meat counter after a while. It’s was good, as my mum and dad had always rattled on at me to get a skill. Which of course butchery was. 
This particular day I went into work to earn my £5.50 £27.50 weekly. And was asked to go in the fridge where I would find 88lbs of cheese, I was given a small flimsy hand grater and away I went, by mid morning I had 2 blue plasters on my knuckles where the skin had ended up in the cheese. But I kept going swopping hands. I then obviously cut the knuckles on my other hand to that also required blue plasters. The grated cheese came with some red speckles in it to.

  
On finishing I was told there was another 88lbs in the fridge that I could make a start on after my lunch. 

  
No way I thought, not a chance I am doing that. Not a chance. So off I went for lunch making a bee line for my local butchers called Chris coombers. They offered me a job and said I would start the next day. I took grate pleasure in going back to kwick save and taking my white coat off and putting it next to the cheese that needed grating.

  
What are you doing said the boss. “Leaving the grating for you, I am off I have a new job. Enjoy your life” off I went for an afternoon riding my bike. It was amazing to feel I was employed. The feeling of freedom was immense.

  
 Well So what’s the point in this blog. Well it’s to encourage you that You have your own destiny in your hands. You can do what ever you like, but you have to make it happen. Don’t carry on being unhappy, your life is yours be happy in it. 

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Recommended blogs

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These are blogs that I feel MAY encourage you. Your feedback fellow bloggers would be appreciated. Why? Because I have included blog links. Do you think I should recommend more or less blogs, I am considering doing a top 3 weekly recommendation. Every single week, I will post blogs to encourage the person that is blogging. (I will only do this if I actually think they deserve to be shared.)

You may want to tell me of a blog you think deserves a mention. But please let me know what you think.

Recommended blogs
http://www.shanneva.com/5-summer-savers/

https://saradoolittle.wordpress.com/2015/07/23/sparkles/

http://deannahp.blogspot.co.uk/

Mark

Heart and soul

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The passion is in us, wether it’s for wood, plants, or fast cars we all are passionate about something. For me it’s fast cars, it’s my love and passion. It’s something I imagined me doing at a young age, sadly it would never happen proberbly due to the commitments our family had to the church and of course we were not wealthy either which did not help.

It’s over 20 years since Senna died, arguably the best driver to ever sit behind the wheel of an F1 car. It’s F1 race day at Hungary today, a really fun track. Clouded by the fact that Jules Bianchi died this week, a life wasted some might say. I am sure for Jules it was the 1 thing he wanted to do and passed doing it. What are your thoughts?  

  
For me it’s to be the best you can be in what ever you do. What’s the point in shuffulling from place to place never giving what you love 100% indeed is there a point in being in a career that you don’t give your all to. Life is ours, it’s ours to enjoy or endure. It’s our choice isn’t it.

  
One day you won’t have these choices to make they will be made for you, by your health or in old age. Life is about doing what you can now, not tomorrow. You have heard me speak of tomorrow the day that never arrives. Let’s not put off till tomorrow what we can do today. Today is what matters, your choices are what matters today. Be who you are, not what someone else wants to be. My wife wanted a career, so I support that whole heartedly. It’s my job to support and encourage my wife. Not make her be what I want her to be, she is her own person and should be allowed to be just that.

  
Some have to fight for their life, like I have. One thing is for sure, I will use what life I have left to encourage as many people as possible. I will continue to endeavour to make a differance, to challenge whilst being the best that I can be. Saying I WILL  and dismissing the negative words where ever possible from my life.

Have a great day

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

How far you have come.

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when ever I am on the right track I always come across people that make your life harder. If I am not on the right road it’s always easier. Am I on my own here. Or is this not the same for all of us? For me doing this everyday as well as reminding myself of different things, and bringing myself to a positive place daily. I hope beyond all hope that others are in turn being encouraged. Someone said to me in a group I joined that my blogs were self promotion. It really annoyed me, even made me feel like not bothering to do this anymore.. But (not wanting to labour) then I saw this.

  
Many of you if not ALL of you reading this will have faced moments when you feel like throwing the towel in. That’s when real people show their real substance, how we respond is everything.  I was definetley deflated last night, I could not even sleep it affected me that much. Anyway that’s behind me now, I am only human.

  
It’s ironic as its made me remember what we have suffered, we as sufferers tend to forget what we felt at certain times. It’s far to distressing to recall. But I realised something, that if I did not write it down it will be lost forever, you never know maybe even folk will understand the road of treatment better.

I believe the word forgiveness is one of the most powerful things we can do. When we forgive someone, it’s not our problem anymore, it also kind of evaporates what we felt. I have talked about forgiveness before in another blog. You may want to read that one to after you have read this one. 

  
One thing I know, is that as people we are unique and hold different opinions. The opinions held by others are thiers, not ours to judge. Learning to not take on others problems as your own is a vital skill in this journey we all call life. You are without doubt unique, you have something to give in all situations. It’s important that we are reminded of how valuable we are, even if it’s us ourselves doing the reminding.

Can I just take the opertunity by saying thank you to all the people that share and comment on these blogs. It means so much to see them spread. 

  
Just remember your the best you can be right now, you also have the opertunity to learn from your past and be a better best by putting it into practice. Remember what you were so you can see how far you have come, victory is so much closer than it was. There is an opertunity in every situation if we look for it.

Have a great weekend

Mark  

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

Come prepared to fight.

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I hope you have a great day today. Today I want to talk to you about my attitude, what drives me and how I am made. 

  
Yes of course I have a side of me that’s considered, genuine, loving and maybe even gentle. But there is a side to me that will not give up, it does not matter what people say to me. I will shun it if it’s negative, even cut that person out of my life completely. I will not allow negativity in my house although I do slip up now and again as I am sure many do.  In the main, we will stop with a coffee and discuss our direction and then get back on track again. 

  
The day I was told I had cancer invoked a reaction, that reaction is what saved my life. We all have a choice in how we respond, the moment we respond is when we show who we really are, what our substance is, what we are made of.  You see I could have adopted the shoulder shrug, then just given in to it. I hear some people do. It’s tough, not something you can take on with a can’t do it attitude. It takes tanacity, it takes depth of who you are, and it takes friendships. 

  
People that spur you on, people you see at the winning line. Only they are there with you holding the spit bucket, mopping your brow, people that help you maintain focus. People that are there because they want to be, not because they have to be. People like my wife. My dad has sent me a message every single day without fail, loving me through some really tough times. Friends that have helped push me up when I had no more in me. We can all be that person for someone, it’s us that chooses to or not to. 

I have been inspired today by a video which I will link at the end of this blog, inspired because we can always do something for someone. It’s our choice to make, I know I keep on about helping others. I make no opology, sorry. 

Surely love is better than hate.

It’s your choice.

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com
Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

What’s impossible?

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How are you? Having a good week? Or are you getting in the way?  I am not sure if people realise that it’s your own mind that restricts us from being a success. The trouble with that word is it means so many different things to so many different people. I mean for me success is about getting into remission. For you it maybe paying off your mortgage, or that new car you have your eye on.  Is that really success though well I don’t think so, because my perimeters have changed.

  
What makes us who we are is what we expect out of life, our expectations are who we are. I used to think that things mattered, that having something matters. Well I have come to the conclusion that  things do NOT show who we are, but how we respond to others depicts what and who we are. We as humans when we see someone we judge them in a few seconds, we assess what sort of person they are. What we drive, how we look, how we dress, how shallow are humans really.  We are so ready to talk about ourselves, I know we have talked about the fact we have 2 ears and 1 mouth therefore we should listen more. 

  
Anyone remember?  That we listen to respond as opposed to listening to what is actually being said in a previous blog. How many of you have put it into practice? Only you know why or what you get out of reading these blogs, but I need you to know something.

It’s really important and I hope you remember this next sentence. ” only what you perceive to be possible can be done, what ever YOU perceive to be impossible will not be done by you” 

  
Everything you believe in your mind IS true. To you anyway, although others may not see it the way you do. That’s what makes them them. We have to accept the parameters people set for themselves, not trying to change what they believe but showing them what you believe. Recovery won’t allow me to be who I am. But what your reading now, is my effort at expression. My way of trying to get you to believe that anything is possible if you believe it. 

  
The only thing between you and success is YOU.

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Everything you read are based on my own experience and my own opinions. I express them here to encourage you. Please share with others, if it meant something to you it will to someone else.

11 years ago

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My how time flies, isn’t it amazing how quickly life passes us by. Well let me paint you a happy picture, so it was a Saturday more than 11 years ago. I had gone to a party in Warrington but by 5 pm they were starting to get a bit silly. No explanation required. Anyway, I decided to phone a friend of mine who met me at Piccadilly in Manchester. The best nights out are never planned, we embarked on a regular night out that would change my life forever in the best way you can imagine. 

  
I remember walking from Piccadilly to the locks, jumping on a few cows in the mean time. Plastic ones. The locks was dead so we moved on stopping off at a place that we had never been to. As I walked into the pub there was this gorgeous blonde sat with her boyfriend and a few of what I assumed were his friends. Even though I had my back to her I was talking to stu about her. I walked past flicking her hair so it stuck to her lip gloss, and whispered “I will be back when you boyfriend gets up” 

He got up n went to the bar, as he did I sat on his seat asking “was that your boyfriend”? “No” she said “do you have a boyfriend” I asked… Again “no” was her answer. “Well give me your number then because I am taking you out next week” was my response. I then rang my phone from her phone to make sure I did not get the flert divert number. 

  
Unfortunately she could not meet me on the Tuesday as she was picking her up from the airport. The only problem was that she called me on the Tuesday and I made up an excuse as to where I was, ( print works ) that I was meeting friends to watch shriek 2 …. Yea right I had not even seen shriek 1. I was on a date on the Tuesday as I was on the Monday.

Anyway, this all led to the Wednesday the next day when we would go on our date. I decided to go out on my bike, a little 900cc ninja that could manage speeds in the high 180,s mph. 

So we met at Stretford Arndale car park, I was leaning on my bike with my ray bans on tight white t shirt and my leather jacket hanging from the handlebars. Then it happened, she turned the corner. ( this scene needs a cloudy look around the edge and slow mo for effect) as she walked towards me, my whole body went weak. I was very pleased I was leaning on my bike. As she walked all the right bits were moving rather attractively in my mind, her steps sped up slightly when she saw me. My word I thought, I wonder if she is thinking the same as me… I was pretty sure my life was going to be changed forever but I had to play it cool. I had to I could not mess this one up.

  
We arrived at the pub in knuts ford where she bought the first drink. We got on quite well, well very well in fact. 

After dropping her back at home, I rode home to North Manchester. (Heat on park) where I sat for an hour, no TV on, no nothing I just sat. I sat thinking that I must now delete all the numbers of potential girlfriends from my phone. Knowing I had met someone special.

  
That girl is now my wife, 11 years on. She is without doubt my best friend a great person to be around and brightens my day every day. We tell each other how much we care everyday, and I will be with her till my dying breath. We have faced losing Andie in the first 2 weeks of marriage and we have fought my cancer for years. But hear we are. Still as crazy about each other as we were 11 years ago.

Happy anniversary my love.

  
Mark

46 and lost In blogs and cancer.

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Why I blog, well for me it’s a way of communicating without leaving my house. I finally decided to do it when we were on holiday in Northumberland. When I realised that cancer was going to beat me if I didn’t have a bonemarrow transplant. 

  
I wanted a way of getting it written down and people would know what thoughts I had had, if indeed I was to die because of the transplant. It was a very real danger to me. But then as time progressed I was getting quite addicted to how many people were reading, and indeed who were not reading my blogs. I regard my blogs as honest and helpful. But to be honest (oh the irony) I feel like I am trying to swim in a place people call Blogging with out any buoyancy aids what so ever.  I don’t understand what I am supposed to do, if  there are any rules. I don’t know, all I do know is how sad I feel. That my legs won’t let me run, how walking is so painful. Yet blogging gives me a way of exspession. Oh how I need to express myself, but feel like I am just a small dot trying to get noticed in a massive sea. 

  
It seems like an impossible task to find the right audience, in fact is there a right audience? I don’t know, but what I do know is that it helps me to release myself of the thoughts I have. It’s a place where I can be me, where do I start in my quest to be a helping hand for those that are experiencing cancer.. People who are fighting to be an arm or an ear to rest on or be heard. Where are the people that need to hear what my experience was like. Where are the people that we can help.

I don’t want to waste my life chasing money, I want to enhance my life by helping others face and beat cancer. we have a site on FB called cancer stories (friends) this has helped many face different issues, even talk about things they never would have. We have had people tell their story before leaving earth. Some of the things that have happened there have been amazing. I need to help, it’s a need not a requirement but yet I feel so lost.

  
I have my hand out, with my heart on my sleeve wanting to help. I don’t want to feel ill everyday I want to feel someone’s hand in mine, to help others move forwards. Using what is available to me now, I just hope someone reads this who can help me. I know God is bigger than this, and maybe I am just not doing the right things. 

When I walked out of the hospital after my transplant, there has been no help offered to me since then. Just a person that did his treatment then left. I guess it’s a snippet of what a soldier feels like when they have served the years they signed up for now left alone. For them to find their way on civi street, away from all the people and banter. It’s similar for me trying to keep my sanity whilst having that feeling of helplessness. With no life jacket just treading water in the big blue sea.  I know God is with me but where are the doors to open, how can a door open when I can’t find one.

One day I was happy, content to have found my wife. Building a life together. Then that ended and I got cancer, I hope to find out in August if the transplant has worked. Then it’s time for a party for all those that have been there for us. 

  
Mark

All my blogs can be found at http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Honest with yourself.

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Ok, I am sorry. Truly sorry. Many years ago when all this stuff came along and potentially ruined my life, stopping me in my tracks, slowing me down and making me think about things more. Maybe my dad was right, maybe I was on self destruct for a time. You see all I ever wanted to do was race, everything was a race, even now I am not happy to be behind another car. I have a feeling in me that wants to be in front of anyone that’s ahead of me. 

  
My dad said he did not help me to persue racing, as I seemed to want to end my life, and had no respect for the consequences of any of my actions. Since being aware that there are other things that we can’t see that can kill you, I slowly gained a respect for my surroundings. A respect for people, for what they stood for, accepting what Others believed, accepting people for who they are not what you hope they would be.
I used to be a 100mph go getta type of person. Not someone that wanted someone else to be the bread winner. I expected that of myself. 

 
 I entered into many business ideas, losing many times. I ran to fast, drove to fast and generally missed everything I was looking for due to my inability to be able to stop and listen. To enjoy what was around me, to rest in the music of the planet. To look for truth in music, it took some unlikely people to turn that around. People that love music, no I mean really love music. Seem to have more depth, more understanding. Of course I had heard music before, but I had never listened to music. 

  
Listening to music you find a new you, a more real balanced you. A you that everyone deserves to see. We have one mouth and 2 ears there has to be a reason for that? No?  It hurts that I can’t get those years back. But what I can do is remember the words that my dad found in the B I B L E.  

  
Joel 2 vs 25   I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten

So how has that happened, I have had to fight. So how have I been repayed. I guess I have had the mud cleaned from my eyes so I can see again. So that I can see what’s important, hear what’s real.  Hear words in music that I otherwise could not, because I was always skipping onto the next song. Or rushing to get somewhere, everything passing me at 100 mph. My wife always says I would look at the view but it’s just a blur when I am with you. Regaining love of a family again, remembering how that feels.

Times like these.  
Please everybody forgive me for my hast, forgive me for rushing. Today is not about being miserable it’s Monday, it’s about accepting it’s Monday and doing yourself a favour and enjoying it as opposed to moaning about it. Love your life, don’t hate it. Change what you can, whilst accepting what you can’t.
  
I used to be able to run, now I can’t but I do get to see what’s in and on the planet now.  

Mark

http://www.fonzandcancer.com

Your kind of world.

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What would the world be like if it was exactly how you wanted it. How would it look, well this is the kind of world I would like to see in my world.  The idea being that, nobody has nobody, that we all have somebody. We have freinds that are selfless but I do see some People just looking out for themselves not others . In fact I was one of those people before I realised how short life truly is. When you reach your 40’s fairly unscathed you have gotta be pleased with that. What do we need really. I mean to say we came into this world with nothing, and we will leave with nothing won’t we. 

  
Some want to leave a legacy, which I admire. Others just want to provide for their families, what we do In between arriving on this planet and leaving is our choice. 

   
But let me put it to you like this, what if every person you came into contact with, was helping you. Looking out for you, making sure you were and are safe. As apposed to keeping your hand on what’s important to you in a crowd. As opposed to being suspicious of everyone wanting something from you. Does it not start with us, start with us making the first move. Helping where we can as opposed to driving past, thinking someone else will do it.

  
This theory has existed for a long time, you only have to look at the story of the Good Samaritan in the bible. People have been kind for years, people have been selfish for years. I would love to hear your good stories. Stories you have heard, or things you have done. Your sharing with us, not bragging to us. It’s nice to be nice, I love kindness so much. I love seeing people smile,  the smile being reward enough.

  
This video says all I want to say, and hope that this blog inspires you to do something for someone. Please comment below about what you saw, or did. Let’s encourage the world to be better for each other. 

  
What will you do?

  
Mark

I hate cancer.

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Not allot happy in me today, today’s blog is dedicated to our friend Becca Parkes who passed yesterday. Becca was terminal. Becca was a selfless person, one of life’s givers, she was a kind bubbly person. When she was in hospital recently, she messaged me asking how I was. 

  
Becca had lung cancer and lived a full life leaving behind a wonderful daughter Ambur. I knew Becca, not that we have been out partying together. But through cancer, through our disease. The very illness that brought us together took her away. Cancer is so cruel, I can’t even think of a word that’s enough, that says enough. Yet does not give cancer respect. 

  
This lady was loving in life, she gave so much to all around her. She was selfless yet tough, kind whilst being thoughtful. She was a person who was real, she was not a person who hid behind a fassard. Becca was who she was, kind to all. Always looking on the bright side of life. Never allowing cancer to crush her, she was a real inspiration to me in that dark room. There will always be a part of me that remembers Beccas kindness.

Today the sun shines, but it’s oh so dark outside. Life is not fair, life’s cruel. But cancer is just a coward, a lying cheating horrible little piece of crap. It’s nothing yet does so much damage to those it touches.

Thank you Becca for encouraging us through the dark times. You will be sadly missed. X

  
 I wonder (as a sign of respect) who will join me in lighting a candle to remember Becca tonight. Whilst remembering her we remember  all those sadly taken by this scrawny cheating thing we call cancer. We will be whilst remembering her family in prayer.

RIP Becca Parkes

This is a song she wanted played at her funeral. 

Please forward this so as many people as possible so people know who Becca was. Xx

Who are you now. Part 4

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So you do your best, Do you? Are you really happy that you have done your best, that you have done all you can to be the best of you? The whole point of the 5 parts of “who are you now” is so that you by the time you have reached part 5. That you yourself have found a better you, and what that takes to be that you thats better. 

  
Confidence

Confidence, is not as bigger deal as some make it out to be. You see once you don’t care what others think, then why is confidence needed? Please let me know if u think I am wrong. The way I see it, it’s about you putting your feet in front of each other. If you don’t care what people think then it does not matter what someone may think of you. I love people that make an effort to achieve, I love it when I see someone get up and dust themselves down and start again. That breeds confidence, something we all need to achieve. Something we rely on more than you think we do. Let’s make it simple again, a chair. You sit on them without thinking. Yet you have the confidence that it will hold your weight. I need allot of faith to, as I tend to be quite heavy handed when I do anything. 

  
I make no opology for keep bringing up my transplant. But when I walked into it, I broke like a crayon and had to have confidence in the people that were going to administer the drugs. That they knew what they were doing, because I know I didn’t have a scooby do what was going on. I had to be confident that I would survive, that I was not going to die. Although it was a tough thing to do, I knew it had to be by the second. when you believe in someone like my wife believes in me. It breeds confidence. I believed I would do it because my wife believed in me, my family believed in me, my friends believed in me. Cancer stories believed in me. These people all gave me the confidence that I needed to do what I needed to. 

  
There were many times I wanted to throw in the towel, many times I wanted to walk away. But then I had to remember a face of someone that believed in me. Someone that helped me have confidence that I would win the fight,  the people that did that for me know darn well who they are. You are more than you have become, you are a better person than you were. I am to. See my wife is with me ” no matter what”  you can’t buy that kind of love. It breeds all sorts of things, confidence being one of them. You are a better person because of the people that are committed to you. Your amazing because of who believes in you.

The bottom line is though, that you have to believe in you. Because.

  
Always give your best, or just don’t bother. You don’t deserve second best, nor does anyone else.

Mark

who are you now. Part 3

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In giving though, don’t we lose out. Isn’t what we have given now owed to us. This is how I used to think, in my school days sometimes. As I grew up I realised that actually it made me feel good, I never understood why some people used me though. Why did people use me like that, why did I do that to others. Why did I have that in my nature. It’s sad how growing up takes so long, but it does because experience takes time, it can’t be rushed. It just takes time. I remember a time when I had many friends,  that taught me though that some people have totally different agendas to me. They wanted different things to me in life, certainly not the things I was thinking of. 

  
I know what it’s like to lose a marriage, I know what it’s like to have your best mate cheat on you with your girlfriend. I know what it’s like to feel loss, I know what it feels like to have your heart broken, i know what it’s like to pray tirelessly by someone you loves bed? Believing she would walk again. I know what it’s like to be hurt both physically and mentally. Life can turn some really cruel blows towards you. 

  
When I was in hospital having my bone marrow transplant, I remember how hard every second was in that room. I say second because 1 second was all I could manage. So I put 60 of those together to make 1 impossible minute. Then string 60 of them together to make 1 impossible hour. Then 24 of those to make an impossible day. Everything was impossible in that room, made possible because of the strength GOD had given me to get through 60 seconds to make an impossible minute. 

“It’s not about how hard you hit, it’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forwards. That’s how winning is done” 

  
Have you ever noticed the people that can look you in the eye. Those people who can look you in the eye. Do you know what they are called? People that keep moving forwards with relentlessness, with seeming unrest. People that keep putting one foot in front of the other. No matter what. These people are known as Winners, people that believe in something. People that have others that believe in them. It does not make them rich all the time financially, but it does make you content that you have done your best. If you do that, (your best) what more can a person ask, but make sure you never give up. Never turn your back on what life has given to you, life may never be that good to you again. 

  
I want my home filled with laughter, love, faith and hope. But one thing there will always be in our home is effort to make things better. We will never give up being better tomorrow than we were today.

Mark

Who are you now, part 2..

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IMorning, how are you today? How we ended yesterday talking about others feeling what’s inside us. I want to cast your mind back to an early memory, the earliest that you can recal, a moment where you felt what the person who was talking to you. Expressed what they were saying and you felt it. It’s a natural skill and we all had it when we were kids. But we were taught to live the way we were taught, which made us selfish, it made us greedy, and self opinionated. When you meet a small child (baby even) they suss you out in seconds. They are the best judge of character on the planet. They know who’s bad and who’s good, they can just pick up your intentions by the way you are with them. Because they have not been taught what’s bad, but they know what’s good. So they. Cry when they don’t understand and smile when they like us.

  
It’s the same with us, only we are not so innocent as we grow older, we are diluted by the world. We have to work out, what someone’s smile is. We become suspicious and thoughts run through our minds like. – what do they want, or what’s in his mind.. Etc why can’t we just smile back.. I love it when someone smiles bk at me, it gives me such a warmth when it’s meant. It makes my day and sets me up. 

  
It’s a pleasure I have but in a fleeting moment most days. It’s like the smile my wife gives me, that just says everything. It’s special in different ways. But non the less they are things that give me the greatest pleasure. I found that when my wife wants something, I might as well just get it for her. It will make her life easier, and mine quieter.

  
I have found in short that, giving is so much more rewarding than taking. The pleasure is in the giving, not the taking. When I give things away, rather than taking a small amount of money. It makes me feel nice, because I wanted to do that. Giving can be our time, and can mean so very much to the person you have given to.
Mark

Muddy glasses

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How are you today?

Muddy glasses, well I guess it’s a bit like you can’t see the wood for the trees. Life can get a bit full sometimes and we just go with what we are used to. What we have been doing for years. If it ain’t broke don’t fix it right? Wrong… Sometimes we need to do a little maintainance to make sure nothing does break so we don’t end up repairing it. (service)
  
These are my opinions based on my experience. Sometimes we just need to inspect our glasses to see if they are working at optimum level. Sometimes we just have to clean them anyway, take a stock take of your life or even how things are between you and the ones you love. Making sure you’re doing enough to keep your relationship on track or even just a health check of how you both see things.

  
Cancer causes us to take a different route, to go down a road we did not have in our thoughts. A road that was not factored into the route we were on. None of it is anyone’s fault, it’s just the route we have to take. We can’t change what we are given. What we can do though is make the best of the worst we have. When we do this, making the best of the worst we have, we find ourselves really enjoying the things we love to do. 
Always remember Cancer is not your fault. It’s not a punishment or a consequence. It’s called “Life” oh yeah I know how rough life can be. But it’s how we deal with it, how we live with it, that makes us the people we are. Yes cancer has changed your life, but one thing I realise is. It has not changed who I am, just the ability to be able to do allot of things. The parameters I have to operate in have changed that’s all, my brother said this to me the first time I had cancer. “We allow visits from cancer, but it’s not allowed to stay” such a positive statement in a negative situation. 

  
Remember to, that your friends and family struggle to know what to say to you to. It’s not their fault either, and the route was not factored into their game plan either. Some people become more compassionate, some distant. They all have reasons, but I bet you if you asked them what the reasons were. They would have no clue what so ever. Little info here. http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/cancer/Pages/life-after-cancer.aspx
Oh and if you need a chat there is a support group called cancer stories (friends) 

https://www.facebook.com/groups/1595998743956536/?fref=ts 

Don’t forget to clean your glasses.
Mark

Sweeter

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Sweeter
Hi all, seems the audience is becoming stronger. So I had better be careful what I write… Really…? No don’t think so! But I am really happy people seem to get something out of reading these blogs everyday. We learn as life goes on, I am not sure if we all learn the same lessons. So I will share one I learnt about sweeter. I always say “you can never know the sweet, without the sour.” It’s the difference in the tastes that makes sweet taste better. If we had never known just how sour, sour is. Then how can we possibly know how sweet really is.

  
A sour in my life was without doubt isolation at Liverpool royal hospital. A very dark place, a place where I feel sick to even to remember how horrible it was. It is good for me to remember how it was, how sour that experience was. It’s now my measure against how good things that are better than that room are. 

  
 What has happened to me, is I actually tolerate things that really used to wind me up before. Things I greatly disliked are not really an issue anymore. If I had not had the experience, I would not know how bad life could get, how harsh life can be to a family. That’s just it though isn’t it, your family and friends ideas change to. It affects everyone connected with your journey because it’s their journey to. 

  
We don’t know who’s life we touch, but I do know it’s important to be honest and allow what you learn to be learnt by someone else to. You will never learn my lesson, but you may learn your own because of my experience . 

  
I am sat in my garden right now, I can feel the sun on my face, my dog by my side of course waiting for me to throw the ball. I have David Guetta playing. Things I imagined doing again in the darkness of L1 and am doing. The sweet things in life which is what sitting in the garden is, is oh sooo much sweeter now. Why because I am using negative things and making them positive. They are your choices to make to.
Mark

Fonzandcancer (grateful)

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Hi guys, have you ever stopped to wonder. No I mean really wonder, how amazing life is. I mean, seriously, It’s amazing. I remember going into have a check done to see how my heart was working. I was asked to ley on my left side and they put some slippery stuff on me (Gel), so I could have an ultra sound on my heart. Wow, how awesome to look at the screen and see your heart pumping like it does. It blew me away just seeing that one organ doing its work to move my blood around my veins. Meanwhile the lungs are supplying the blood with oxygen, whilst many others process food for energy and help us grow. Ok so some points in our life we grow in areas we don’t want to, but our bodies are still amazing things. 

  Myself, when I think of the opportunity I have had for a fresh start. To rid myself of cancer and move forwards without it. I am filled with gratitude that I was able to have the treatment I have had. Now I am not saying that the journey was easy. Far from it, but surly if we put our feet in front of the other one we make some progress. That’s what we have done for the last 4 and a bit years. Taken each day as it comes and looked forwards to each morning. Looking forwards to hearing the birds, the wind on my face, the fish in my stream. Every day is a gift, everyday is a new start where we can receive forgiveness and start again.
  We are loved, whole heartedly, we are compassionately cherished even on the days we don’t feel like we are. God loves us. It’s unconditional, it’s real and God is faithful. 
I am so passionate about reaching out to others, to help them believe that they have the strength within them to beat cancer. To still stand, to continue to move forwards, to maintain focus. For me, whilst never ever asking why me, it’s a case of appreciating that not only do we have a life, but that we have lived the years we have lived. 

When was the last time you got your photos out and remembered the things you did when you were younger. When did you last open a bottle of wine and laugh together at your past instead of remembering the bad things. My mum and dad are really good at reminding us of the good times, my mum was great at making times that we would remember right up until I was 46 (I am 46 now) I hope and pray that me and my wife can be a blessing to others in the future. So many cliches are running through my head right now, but.

 To be happy in a life, is better than to regret a life.

  Every day I want to be a better person, and every day I am shown something new. Why? Because I am willing to accept something new, to accept new ideas. Not believing that mine are the best and only ones. Those that are willing WILL achieve, but from what I have learnt in my life, nothing and no one comes along and gifts you anything. Except love, love is everywhere, in everything, and in everyone. We were created with love, so why would that not be true. It’s down to us what we give to others, 

It’s our life to live, and our love to give.
Mark
http://www.fonzandcancer.com 

Fonzandcancer (Emotions)

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It’s a little bit weird sat here today, I am feeling worn out. Both mentally and physically, I don’t feel I have a direction at the moment. It’s the frustration of wanting to be better, but not having the strength to do what you want to do. Everybody’s situation is different in recovery but it is sad to say that I had it in my bones which is proberbly why I get so much pain in my limbs. Although as I write my eyes are like taps running that won’t stop, I want to try and explain what’s happening. You see God gave us emotions, why would they exsist if we are not meant to use them. We all need to be able to release what ever feeling it is within us. If it’s happiness we smile or laugh, sadness we cry or get angry. I must not and cannot get angry, I have to allow myself to cry or the build up turns to rage which is not only distructive to the person that’s angry, but can be to others around us to.

  Every piece of this track needs to be working correctly to get the train that runs on it to where it’s going. Every link, bolt, sleeper, and piece of metal needs to function. If a piece fails, cracks, or is not perfect it needs to be fixed or it can cause a catastrophe. It will affect thousands of people’s lives, it will affect them all for many years maybe never ever getting over the accident that happened. 
But what happens if there is no tangable reason for us to be in our situation. What happens if you can’t put it down to a bad weld, or a slack bolt. What happens if it’s just a horrendous thing we have to deal with through no fault of our own. A devastating blow that hit us, that takes years to deal with then years to recover from. It’s a tough old place to be, and you know what. Sometimes you just don’t want to fight anymore, sometimes you just want to let it all out through our emotions so we CAN be strong again. So we WILL get up again to make that difference. That’s why we sleep to regain strength, but sometimes sleep is not enough. Sometimes gritting our teeth through a situation is not possible, because you have to just Let. Allow your body to do its thing.

  
Guess what, I cannot change the fact I have to fight, I can’t change the fact that I have had cancer twice and have had to have 30 days of my life with chemo being pumped into my veins. I cannot change any of that, I don’t want to be upset but I have to let my body do its thing. I have to allow the grief (because that’s what it is) to leave me. I am guessing what I feel is similar (no feeling is exactly the same) to losing someone close. The fact that life will never be the same again. That who you were is not who you will be. Isn’t that the same for everyday of our lives though. That we will never be who we were yesterday because. (My words) “today is yesterday’s blessing that somebody missed”.

  Remember there is always someone worse off than you are, but that does not make the mountain you are climbing any less steep.  It does not mean your battle is small in comparasum. You are important, your emotions are important. As a man there is a stigma that men don’t cry. What a load of crap. 
  
Mark
http://www.fonzandcancer.com

When will this end!!

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The doctors say I will get stronger, when? I am so sick of feeling weak, being weak. Digging in to gain more strength. When will it end, there are things I want to do, people I want to bless and I can’t all because of bloody cancer. I hate the word, I hate being weak. I hate feeling inadequate. I am, there is no getting away from it. I am not me. The true reality of recovery, is not just getting over cancer. It’s becoming strong again, becoming mentally strong again. My mental health, my physical strength, my hope needs to return. All aspects of life need to start afresh.

  
This is a real hard time in life, no one will understand where I am at unless u have been a sufferer. I want so much to be out there, but I have to rest. Bloody rest they keep telling me, I am in pieces today. Absolute bits, why because I guess that’s what fights do. They break you down, they crush you until u have nothing more to give. Jesus says, when you are weak then I am am strong. Sometime you don’t even want to live, it’s such a long battle. Such hard work every second of every day. 

  
I know one day I will beat this, but I long for a day I can laugh and enjoy just 1 day. To laugh without a care, to just be me without that horrible word in my life. I am angry even furious right now, why does it always have to be about cancer. When will it stop. Please wake me in a year!

Maybe you will never again see the Mark in the picture above, but the one you do see will listen more, be more considerate. Maybe even have some of the old strength back. But right now I am like a tipped over Jenga stack. I HATE CANCER! 

  

 
See that wave, I just wish it would wash all this away.

Mark

The Johnny Herbert ethos.

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Wow, have you read the Johnny passion. What drove a man who had seemingly lost all hope for but a few seconds. Brands hatch F3000 1988 looks like he has lost his legs, Johnny looked through the whole at the front of the car. Fleeting thoughts that he may have lost his legs. Then seeing his feet still attached to his legs, then believing that racing was still a possibility.  That’s called courage, and belief.

  
I am sure many of us can relate Johnny Herbert’s fight to our own lives, but what did you do. Did you give up or dig in? Unfortunately it takes me back to a very hard time in my life, where a battle commenced. Although I was not the one who had to over come the physical injuries but to support, the person who’s situation seemed so hopeless.

  
To encourage, to believe that although the person in questions leg was hanging off we had to trust that she would walk again.  The omagh bomb a time that I have spoken about in my book, but as it’s not even published yet I won’t expand to much. But I will say it was a similar situation, caused by evil men that ruined many many people’s lives. We all have situations where we get tested to the maximum. This is the video of johnnys accident, just to try and bring your day a little balance. 

It’s the ethos though, the comparison to our own life I am sure you know. It’s not nessasaraly a body part but maybe a moment in your life that changes you. Makes you believe in you more than you did, have to dig in and move forwards no matter what is thrown at you. This is what I try to explain every day the winning spirit,  winning is not always a trophy or something tangable.  It is with in you, the will to carry on. To be a winner and not an excuse person. It takes grit, commitment. It takes relentlessness, tanacity and a spirit that only winners have.

  
Johnny got into a Benneton F1 car years later and scored points in his first race. This was Johnny in 1995 winning the British Grand Prix. An amazing feat after all that Johnny had faced 7 years previous. I respect anyone that can stand in the face of adversity. Then move forwards, it’s all about moving forwards and holding your head up knowing that you have done your best to be your best. My spelling was horrendous when I first started blogging, I am better now I am sure.

Most of you know I have been fighting cancer for 7 yrs, not something man has done to me. By his Evil, nor a terrible accident. What I have is a fight anyone of us could have, or have had.

  
How would you deal with it? It’s about faith for me, believing that the strength God has given me is more than enough to sustain me. It’s not possible that there is not someone more powerful than us out there looking after us. Is there? I just can’t see how such beautiful people can just evolve. We are amazing and I believe the only restriction is us. You are your worst enemy, or your greatest adversary; it’s your choice.

But I choose to have faith and undertake the Johnny Herbert attitude and believe i will race again. 

What’s your choice?

Mark

Getting up.

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There is one thing I love to do in life, but it’s not pleasant. Falling down I love it, it hurts and sometimes hurts for a little while. But have you ever thought about where you end up after you have fallen over. Ok here’s my thoughts for today. 

  Nobody likes to look silly, or fall over in front of people. I remember once picking up my watch and waiting for a friend who saw coming towards me. So I ran to meet him at the lights in the middle of the day with shoppers everywhere. What did I do I tripped at full pelt, (I had put my watch on by this point) putting my hands forwards. Down the path sliding on the metal bracelet of my watch, that my wife bought me for our engagement. I was so embarrassed, I just got straight back up and got in the van. I was cut and I had to go back to the watch shop.
  There is a lesson to be learnt every time we fall over,  every time we make a mistake there is something positive to take from it. I spend my life trying to get something positive from every situation. My cups half full you might say, or I focus on the things that matter in life as opposed to the worldly patheticness that we get entwined in sometimes. Things like, the reason I got married, not why did you forget the milk. Life’s so precious, and I tell you the older you get the more precious it gets. Life can change in an instant, but goodness can be found everywhere if we look. But the trick is we have to be willing to look.

  You see when you fall over where do you end up, when you stand back up?

Further ahead, you have actually “moved on” now I don’t know if that’s where the term comes from but it sure would make sense. The fact remains though that when we get back up we are further on than we were, or in a different place than we were. That depends how it fits into your life.

Now all you have to do is decide what you will do the next time you fall.

Mark
You can get my blog every morning at 6am at http://www.fonzandcancer.com  

The diaries.

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You never thought about how much things have changed in the last 30 years. I mean 30 years ago a diary were private, under lock and key even. My sister would never let us read her diary. My how things have changed, from not being able to read a diary, to people unhappy if what they write is not read. It’s all about the stats these days, so what happened to us. Why such a drastic change, has the www. Generation changed our personalities and created different people. Well as always here is my take on it. 

  
 Generally people don’t like family reading our personal thoughts (this was the case for me) but why. Surly family are the people we should trust more than anyone else, surly being vulnerable to your family is a good thing. Maybe it is, and if I had children it would be a very open house. 

People seem to want their most private thoughts to be made available to the world using media, like face pig, twit accounts, it’s amazing how much we have changed. But is it us that has changed or the method. See I think it’s easier to be open with someone that does not know you. It’s easier to be honest, because you won’t be judged. Or maybe if you are it does not matter because you can just unfollow them or unfriend them. We can’t unfriend family. Because family is family, I am talking brothers sisters, and mums n dads. These are the people you can rely on, people that know us inside out. They know us more than the partner they have. That is until they have their own children. 

  

 Social – media. It’s exactly what it says on the tin isn’t it. Social… Media. It’s a place where we can be who we want, create an avatar and be someone different. I however use it for honesty, to tell people how it is for me and introduce new ideas into people’s lives. To learn myself, be guided by others moments. Maybe a new way of thinking about someone, a new way of thinking Yourself maybe. All the same it’s about sharing what we learn in life.. 

Mines been quite colourful, from being expelled from school, rehabilitation in my 20’s to experiencing what it’s like to know and love someone involved in a bomb blast. My exsperiences are real, not manufactured in anyway. Not fiction, just real reality. Sad, happy, lovely, and loving moments all shared with you. 

  
I want you to know how it feels. I want you to know what I felt. I want you to know what it takes to be a winner, I want you to know that success is just around the corner. I want you to know love exsists, I want you to know in your heart God loves you, he does not want to change you. He wants you to learn so you improve who you are. All my life I did not know what Gods grace was, God was a God of judgment and discipline. I have taught my dog with praise not by telling her off. I have encouraged her to be a better dog. Isn’t that why we share, isn’t that what we want for others. To be encouraged to be better people, that others would hear of our mistakes so they don’t have to make them. Are we not a caring nation?   

So there you have it, social media for me is about sharing experiences. We could not do that with our locked diaries, even though we can stop some from reading what we put. There is some control, but it’s a great thing used in the right way. I WILL NOT waste my time judging, or getting involved in negative chat, I want to hear others opinions, I want to know what makes others tick, so maybe I can learn to be a better person. 

Giving others love and encouragement is priceless. What do you think? 

Mark

You can log onto http://www.fonzandcancer.com to see my latest post after 6am every morning.